Author Topic: Advice for a meet-up/new group, time sensitive  (Read 628 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

PurpleFrog

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 628
Advice for a meet-up/new group, time sensitive
« on: November 05, 2013, 09:26:23 AM »
I've decided its time to force myself out of my rut and meet some people, ouside of mummys and work. So I joined meetup and I'm going to a women's one this evening. While I used to be quite social, since I had the boys I've lost my confidence, so actually doing this is a big deal for me, as silly as it sounds.  Does anyone have any advice, general or etiquette for me.
Thank
[img width=400 height=88]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/4;10773;484/st/20120825/e/Our+Wedding/dt/-1/k/450f/eve

Redsoil

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2116
Re: Advice for a meet-up/new group, time sensitive
« Reply #1 on: November 05, 2013, 09:36:17 AM »
One thing I've found to be useful in such situations is to think more about others than how you may be feeling.  Shift the focus to them, rather than dwelling on feeling under-confident.  Chances are, they'll be feeling much the same!

Try to think of topics of interest ahead of time (maybe do some light reading on current issues of general interest/see a current film etc.) so you can engage in chit-chat.  Have a list of questions that may spark conversations, and show a real interest in other's lives.  You may be pleasantly surprised at how much you can relax, once you conquer any feelings of supposed "inadequacy" in social situations.  Maybe even pretend you're chatting to someone from EHell, so you can engage more effectively?

Good luck with the meet-up.  I hope you really enjoy expanding your social experiences!
Look out... 
It's one of the Aussie Contingent!


cwm

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2427
Re: Advice for a meet-up/new group, time sensitive
« Reply #2 on: November 05, 2013, 09:57:52 AM »
The most important thing I've ever done in a meetup situation was to realize that I was not the only person there who was socially nervous. Before you do anything else, look around at everyone else in the group. Then realize that they all have their own insecurities, anxieties, and fears that they carry around.

Another thing that's helped me immensely is my posture, weirdly enough. When I stand up straight and square my shoulders and raise my head, I feel more confident.

Remember, you don't have to be the center of everything. All you have to do is show up and socialize, and most of all enjoy yourself.

Congrats for stepping out and doing something new!

Oh Joy

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1405
Re: Advice for a meet-up/new group, time sensitive
« Reply #3 on: November 05, 2013, 10:02:53 AM »
Good for you!  I love Meetup groups.  They're all a little different, but a little prep might help your confidence.

Do some 'stalking' on the group's page before you go.  Learn the names and faces of the organizers.  They will likely approach and welcome you, but you can hover toward them if you feel lost.  Read about past events so you can make small talk of 'I saw there was an event at ABC...I haven't been there before.  Did you go?' 

Don't be afraid to say it's your first Meetup ever, as a veteran member may take you a bit under their wing.  Another conversation starter is to ask about other groups they recommend.

And if this group isn't right for you, check out some others.

Have fun!

PurpleFrog

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 628
Re: Advice for a meet-up/new group, time sensitive
« Reply #4 on: November 05, 2013, 12:59:15 PM »
Thank everyone. Advice taken. On my way now.
[img width=400 height=88]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/4;10773;484/st/20120825/e/Our+Wedding/dt/-1/k/450f/eve

jpcher

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 8768
Re: Advice for a meet-up/new group, time sensitive
« Reply #5 on: November 05, 2013, 01:31:04 PM »
I think you were given some great advice.

Good luck! Let us know how it went.

PurpleFrog

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 628
Re: Advice for a meet-up/new group, time sensitive
« Reply #6 on: November 06, 2013, 03:11:43 AM »
Thank you again. You're advice was excellent. It went really well, I enjoyed it and will definitely be going again. :)
[img width=400 height=88]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/4;10773;484/st/20120825/e/Our+Wedding/dt/-1/k/450f/eve

Oh Joy

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1405
Re: Advice for a meet-up/new group, time sensitive
« Reply #7 on: November 06, 2013, 07:39:33 AM »
Yay!

cwm

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2427
Re: Advice for a meet-up/new group, time sensitive
« Reply #8 on: November 06, 2013, 11:23:55 AM »
Glad to hear it!