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Author Topic: Team dinner question  (Read 18455 times)

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Re: Team dinner question
« Reply #45 on: October 16, 2013, 06:25:28 PM »
I swam competitively for ten years. The events are individual, but the team is very much a team. I would have felt very isolated from my teammates if I had been on a team for five years and couldn't have joined my teammates for the team dinner at the end of this huge event.

This. I got whisked away from a lot of team events as a kid because my dad didn't like socializing with the other parents and didn't trust the other parents as competent supervision (i.e. either he went or I didn't, and he didn't want to). I was never really a part of those teams, socially, and didn't bond with the other kids. And they didn't see the "mechanism" behind why I couldn't go, so I got a reputation for being kind of "precious" and thinking I was too good for them.


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Re: Team dinner question
« Reply #46 on: October 16, 2013, 07:25:05 PM »
Please let her go or take her. It's one night out of four or five, but it's a mght that can have a huge impact on her standing with the team and with her friends. Teammates who feel you aren't a team player - and never ever attending team dinners out of town can create that impression - can make your life miserable in a thousand ways.

As far as the issue of it being a chain restaurant, well, sorry, but I think you need to suck it up. They likely pick that place because it's relatively inexpensive (not all team members might be able to afford nicer restaurants) and a buffet provides a wide variety along with a solid quantity. Plus it's easier to accommodate pickiness and get everyone through quickly.


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Re: Team dinner question
« Reply #47 on: October 17, 2013, 08:57:35 AM »
I think this is a sack up and go moment. It's one night out of five- no, the food isn't exciting, but you can deal. This is part of being on a team sport.
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Five things observe with care,
To whom you speak,
Of whom you speak,
And how, and when, and where.
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Re: Team dinner question
« Reply #48 on: October 17, 2013, 04:18:23 PM »
Actually, I think there is a distinct difference between being on the team and supporting the team. The parents support the team by getting DD to team events, cheering at competitions, etc. I think problems can actually arise when parents imagine that they are on thr team.


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Re: Team dinner question
« Reply #49 on: October 17, 2013, 04:42:09 PM »
Much of the bonding, athletes and parents, happens outside of the actual event...say at a boring buffet.  At least that was the case when my brothers were on sport teams. 


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Re: Team dinner question
« Reply #50 on: October 17, 2013, 05:11:56 PM »
OP again. :)

As long as it is okay with the coach, and I think it will be, we're just going to drop DD off.
This one dinner is the only thing we miss out of the entire year.  DD is very active in the team and gets lots of bonding time besides this one dinner ( that not everyone makes it to anyway).

We are able to take small breaks during the day, usually just sitting in the parking lot for 10 minutes, but her swim schedule for this meet is such that we honestly can't stray far for the 12-13 hours we're there.  It's a larger city for *us* but not a "big city" by any means, so going to a mall or a meal during the meet involves considerable driving for the time between events.

We do realize team bonding and support is important, we've been with the team for 5 years now and give all the support we can to all the great kids :)