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• May 30, 2016, 11:59:23 AM

### Author Topic: How to say, “You already got your payment/thank you.” Updt #103!  (Read 33865 times)

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#### Two Ravens

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##### Re: How to say, “You already got your payment/thank you.” Updt #103!
« Reply #150 on: October 17, 2013, 11:16:31 AM »
The OP can continue to fester with outrage or accept it for what it was; a clueless and innocent mistake that they fixed with lesson learned (on both sides.)

I didn't get the impression from the updates that the OP was still festering with outrage?  Although I do really like that wording and plan to use it myself at the next possible opportunity.

I'm really not festering. No festering here.

I was never really "outraged" either. More like "really annoyed."

#### Drunken Housewife

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##### Re: How to say, “You already got your payment/thank you.” Updt #103!
« Reply #151 on: October 17, 2013, 11:27:48 AM »
I think the OP responded gracefully, by not speaking up about the loss of an expensive treat until she'd taken time to consult us & figure out a polite course of action.  By that time, her friends had responded gracefully, by spending a couple hundred dollars replacing the wine.

A horrible faux pas was made, but everyone responded with good humor.  The catsitters learned an expensive lesson about wine.  I would definitely use those same people for catsitting again, because they would probably be tiptoeing around the house for fear everything would be extremely expensive to replace.
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#### VorFemme

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##### Re: How to say, “You already got your payment/thank you.” Updt #103!
« Reply #152 on: October 17, 2013, 03:22:13 PM »
And the OP was willing to let them drink wine.  So the price difference between a 2007 and 2009 probably falls in the price range OP was willing to accept as part of the cost of pet sitting.

I ran a search - the price difference between the two is almost enough to cover two steak dinners at a mid-price steakhouse...not quite enough for two bottles of the replacement Opus One, though.
Let sleeping dragons be.......morning breath......need I explain?

#### veronaz

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##### Re: How to say, “You already got your payment/thank you.” Updt #103!
« Reply #153 on: October 17, 2013, 04:08:02 PM »
OP - could DH have subtly said something to co-worker.......or maybe just gone ahead and bought the replacements himself (knowing you were upset)?

Just something that occurred to me.

#### TinyVulgarUnicorn

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##### Re: How to say, “You already got your payment/thank you.” Updt #103!
« Reply #154 on: October 17, 2013, 04:17:54 PM »
And the OP was willing to let them drink wine.  So the price difference between a 2007 and 2009 probably falls in the price range OP was willing to accept as part of the cost of pet sitting.

I ran a search - the price difference between the two is almost enough to cover two steak dinners at a mid-price steakhouse...not quite enough for two bottles of the replacement Opus One, though.

Yeesh...I'd be seeing red then...red, red wine...

#### jedikaiti

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##### Re: How to say, “You already got your payment/thank you.” Updt #103!
« Reply #155 on: October 17, 2013, 04:20:09 PM »
And the OP was willing to let them drink wine.  So the price difference between a 2007 and 2009 probably falls in the price range OP was willing to accept as part of the cost of pet sitting.

I ran a search - the price difference between the two is almost enough to cover two steak dinners at a mid-price steakhouse...not quite enough for two bottles of the replacement Opus One, though.

I just looked on Wine.Com and the price difference between the 2007 and 2009 was more like $30, not enough for a couple steak dinners. What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science! "The problem with re-examining your brilliant ideas is that more often than not, you discover they are the intellectual equivalent of saying, 'Hold my beer and watch this!'" - Cindy Couture #### VorFemme • Member • Posts: 15228 • I am not sweating, I'm glowing! ##### Re: How to say, “You already got your payment/thank you.” Updt #103! « Reply #156 on: October 17, 2013, 04:38:30 PM » And the OP was willing to let them drink wine. So the price difference between a 2007 and 2009 probably falls in the price range OP was willing to accept as part of the cost of pet sitting. I ran a search - the price difference between the two is almost enough to cover two steak dinners at a mid-price steakhouse...not quite enough for two bottles of the replacement Opus One, though. I just looked on Wine.Com and the price difference between the 2007 and 2009 was more like$30, not enough for a couple steak dinners.

I used a different search engine and got a range of prices - the difference between the "average" was $75 or$80 USA - I think that it mentioned that the price did change sometimes, depending on various factors.

Today's search netted a bit under $45 USA as the difference - so, still two steak dinners, just you'd have to settle for small steaks at a chain restaurant. It was a BIG price jump from the 375 ml to the 750 ml - one or two places had the smaller bottle at$100 USA with the larger one averaging 2.5X that on the 2009.  I don't remember if the OP mentioned which size bottle it was.

I don't think I'll be drinking either year from that winery any time soon.
« Last Edit: October 17, 2013, 05:20:26 PM by VorFemme »
Let sleeping dragons be.......morning breath......need I explain?

#### jedikaiti

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##### Re: How to say, “You already got your payment/thank you.” Updt #103!
« Reply #157 on: October 17, 2013, 05:44:58 PM »
Me either, but I was telling the story to DH (a chef who knows a bit about wine) and had to wait until he put something down before I told him WHAT wine it was. His eyes went REALLY big and if he'd still been holding the bin of storage containers, they would have crashed to the floor. :-)
What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

"The problem with re-examining your brilliant ideas is that more often than not, you discover they are the intellectual equivalent of saying, 'Hold my beer and watch this!'" - Cindy Couture

#### Harriet Jones

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##### Re: How to say, “You already got your payment/thank you.” Updt #103!
« Reply #158 on: October 17, 2013, 05:55:29 PM »
I wouldn't be festering with outrage, either - they did try to make it right.  I'd probably be willing to let them catsit again, but I'd be more specific with my "make yourself at home" instructions.

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« Reply #159 on: October 17, 2013, 05:56:41 PM »
I don't think they purposely set out to drink your special wine.  If you told them to help themselves and to feel at home, well, they did just that.

I wouldn't have done the same but then, others have a different thought process.

At this point, I'd either write it off or ask for it to be replaced.

i completely agree.

#### IrishGenes

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##### Re: How to say, “You already got your payment/thank you.” Updt #103!
« Reply #160 on: October 17, 2013, 05:58:59 PM »
And the OP was willing to let them drink wine.  So the price difference between a 2007 and 2009 probably falls in the price range OP was willing to accept as part of the cost of pet sitting.

I ran a search - the price difference between the two is almost enough to cover two steak dinners at a mid-price steakhouse...not quite enough for two bottles of the replacement Opus One, though.

Yeesh...I'd be seeing red then...red, red wine...

Thanks for the earworm.

"Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world's grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it."  ~ The Talmud

#### GreenEyedHawk

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##### Re: How to say, “You already got your payment/thank you.” Updt #103!
« Reply #161 on: October 18, 2013, 08:14:56 AM »
I'm glad things came out well in the end.  They must have felt awful when they saw the price of the wine they'd taken.
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#### Bijou

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« Reply #162 on: October 20, 2013, 06:38:18 AM »
Unexpected and Conflict-free Resolution!

Husband came home today, bearing wine. One bottle of Opus One and two other decent bottles.

Apparently Friend and GF decided to drink the wine, figuring they would just buy us replacements. They apparently had quite a bit of sticker-shock when it came to the Opus One.

DH said Friend said they figured the wine would be okay to drink since:
1. It was from California (Apparently they thought only French wines were really expensive/good)
2. The label indicated it was a blend. The label says "A Napa Valley Red Wine." I guess they figured an expensive wine would be labeled as a Pinot or Cabernet or whatever.

So basically all is resolved. The wine they gave was a 2009, not a 2007, but we decided not to quibble. (My husband's whole opinion on the matter was "See, I told you we should have drank it when we got it." He wanted to open it right away, rather than save it for sometime special.)

So, all's well that ends well, I guess
Expensive lesson for them.  I hope it sticks.
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#### sammycat

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##### Re: How to say, “You already got your payment/thank you.” Updt #103!
« Reply #163 on: October 20, 2013, 07:26:19 AM »
I'm really pleased they planned all along to replace the wine and, in fact, did so! It's so rare that these stories have a happy ending.

That being said, I don't like to be a downer, but think of the angst their action has caused, because they didn't leave a note/email/etc. about their plan. And, the fact remains that they did drink something that was wrapped up and set aside a bit, apparently without researching it beforehand. The fact that they replaced it is great and makes their actions overall a whole lot better, don't get me wrong. But I might think to myself that they and I have different boundaries when it comes to being in someone's home, and maybe I'm not comfortable with them being in my home unsupervised any longer, just because of that.

I mean, they didn't rush to have the wine replaced by the time the OP got home, for example, or make sure to communicate their plan with her--what if next time they borrowed something the OP really needed right away? Or, since they didn't research the item they borrowed before consuming it (which they might have learned from now, granted), what if next time they consumed something that couldn't be replaced, or that they couldn't afford to replace? (Even with the wine they went with/had to go with a different year, so that's not an exact replacement.) To me--knowing nothing else about this couple except what's in this thread--it would make me wary of setting up this same situation again.

Definitely not a relationship-ender, but maybe I would just say to myself, "Okay, these aren't the people I'm going to ask to check on my house again while I'm gone. We'll do other things as friends."
I agree with this post completely. I'm glad this mostly worked out (mostly because they didn't actually replace the bottle with the same thing). I wouldn't be taking them out to an expensive dinner to thank them - I would thank them sincerely and make a mental note to find a different cat sitter. I wouldn't end a potential friendship over this as I do think that they were considerate to at least try to replace it, but they shouldn't be unwrapping bottles of wine that are separated from the rest of the wine and then drinking it. And I might not know a whole lot about wine, but I would assume that a wrapped bottle from 2007 probably has some sort of a value - monetary or sentimental or both - and leave it alone.

I agree with these two posts.

Just in general, I can't imagine poking around in another person's stuff, despite being told to 'make myself at home', whether that be a cupboard, fridge, pantry or whatever.  At most, I'd open the fridge and if a soft drink/juice was immediately visible I'd take that, but wouldn't go digging around. (I don't drink wine so the wine rack would be a non-issue).

#### mlogica

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##### Re: How to say, “You already got your payment/thank you.” Updt #103!
« Reply #164 on: October 20, 2013, 05:39:54 PM »
Since they tried to fix their mistake (although poorly because it wasn't an exact replacement) I would still be "miffed" if not outright mad. If something is wrapped you know it's special for some reason. Even if you have a relationship with a friend where you feel you can consume something and replace it later, you had better be sure it's replaceable. A can of coke? Sure. A wrapped gift bottle of wine? Absolutely not.

I don't think it's so clear cut.  I can see their logic:  "Hmm, OP is really into wine.  I don't want to take anything that's important, so I'll stay away from the wine rack.  What's this one in the back?  Oh, it's just a Californian.  It doesn't even say what kind it is, just 'red'.  They probably got it as a give away or something.  Let's go with this one."

Interesting thread and I'm glad the situation was resolved to the OP's satisfaction.

And I basically agree with what bonyk said, above.  It puts the best possible interpretation on the behaviour, and if I'm friendly enough with someone that I'm willing to trust them with my cats and my home, then I would be wanting to put the best possible interpretation on something that was unexpected and seemed "off".

My opinion is definitely coloured by the fact that I'm one of those people who mean "Help yourself to pretty much anything you want to eat/drink" when I tell the cat sitter to "make yourself at home".  We use a cat sitting service and we also have high maintenance, daily meds cats who get two visits a day.  And I have said to my sitter, to ensure there is no misunderstanding, that if she's busy and has a lot of visits to make, to feel free to make herself lunch, take a coffee break, etc. at our place.  We've never had anything on hand that I've specifically excluded, but if we did, it would be unusual enough that I'd mention it or leave a note.