Was anyone else bothered by the thought of kids getting points and getting prizes for who donates the most? Doesn't seem like a great way to foster a spirit of generosity to me, when it seems like setting kids up to think even more about themselves than those they're helping.
I don't see a problem with it. It happens all the time. Remember those toy and candy things we used to sell as kids? Girl Scout cookies? Marathons and bike-a-thons? Someone often gets a prize. My kids' grade school typically had a classroom party for for the room that brought in the most money/cans.
That said, the fact that Carol is putting out flyers for a "competing" charity and for her own personal gain, after being warned to knock it off, is beyond me.
I don't have a problem with people peddling their children's (or their own) wares and charity functions at work, so long as no one feels strong-armed into contributing. If these ladies were employed, they may fear retribution if they don't dig deep into their pockets and support Connor or his mother whenever she brings it up. I have lived in that world and it is not fun.
The said thing is, this is a charity the OP enjoys a great deal. Sure, she can leave. She doesn't really have to fear loss of income. But she may not be able to find a charity and coworkers and co-volunteers) she enjoys nearly as much. And the organization will lose valuable members if this nonsense continues. It sounds like it could get hostile.
I also feel badly for Carol. I probably wouldn't report the flyer just yet and give it a couple weeks to fizzle out and get back to normal. Tis' the season for charity and giving, and frankly, I'd hate to see Carol lose her job this time of year. If any other volunteers or employees wish to also raise cans/socks/toys (with permission), I think it would be great if everyone could put flyers, boxes, sign sheets in the employee area
with no expectations and no fear of retribution. I think Carol taking a more "anonymous" approach with the canned goods and flyers was a better approach and for a worthy cause, not personal acting camp, but on top of her other antics, she blew it and she still carries an aura of entitlement.
What I'm wondering is if Carol suddenly started exhibiting this behavior? Has she always gone after her subordinates to fund Connor and his events/charities? Has everything suddenly escalated?