Author Topic: inviting coworkers to social events?  (Read 1710 times)

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lellah

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inviting coworkers to social events?
« on: October 26, 2013, 03:19:00 AM »
I'm reasonably new to town and am interested in making friends. Also, I work at a very large corporation where I interact daily with dozens of people.

Not long ago I had a party. I invited a number of coworkers.  For the sake of keeping my guest list manageable and not making any exclusionary choices, I extended invitations, outside of work, to the six people whose cubes adjoin mine.  Social ease through geometry!  Most of them were unable to make it due to a scheduling conflict I probably should've forseen, and only one coworker came to the party.  Since then, I've re-invited a second coworker from the original guest list to fill out a dinner party.  Now I'm a little concerned: do I have some kind of obligation to systematically reinvite my original invitees?  Or am I within bounds to invite only the people I like best to future social events? 

My party was quite fabulous and the one person who made it keeps mentioning the quality of the food, music, etc and people have expressed interest coming to future parties.

Ceallach

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Re: inviting coworkers to social events?
« Reply #1 on: October 26, 2013, 03:52:14 AM »
No obligation to extend further invitations to those who declined, in fact if they actually declined because they didnt want to attend or socialize outside of work you don't want to make things awkward by repeating it - they are capable of extending invitations themselves if they want to reciprocate and share a non-work social relationship.

I definitely think that work and social life can be mixed, and personally have made some great life long friends that way.  But the key to remember is that once done its very hard to undo.  For that reason be selective as to who you invite into your non-work life - remember they stay in your life regardless even if you decide you don't gel socially, which can lead to work awkwardness if you try to withdraw from the friendship.
"Nobody can do everything, but everybody can do something"


cwm

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Re: inviting coworkers to social events?
« Reply #2 on: October 28, 2013, 01:45:30 PM »
I agree, there's no further obligation.

I'm very picky when accepting non-work social invitations from co-workers that aren't in any way work related. Frequently a bunch of the salespeople go out for happy hour and everyone from the sales floor is invited. That's fine. But if I had an open house when I got a home of my own, I'd only be inviting a handful of people from the whole company. If someone I sit beside who was new in town had invited me to something, I'd be wary of accepting until I knew that person better, and if I was re-invited to something I'd find it awkward as well to keep declining.