General Etiquette > Family and Children

Is My Thank You Note Good Enough?

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I don't want people here to blast me for this (it's happened in other forums), so let me include a few disclaimers.

1) I have social anxiety disorder - this basically means that I'm terrified of social situations and even starting conversations with people, especially a loved one. I visibly shake when talking to people - even people I really like. I often have panic attacks in most normal daily social situations. I dread calling someone on the phone and even a simple email turns into a nightmare of anxiety. No one in my family knows I have this even though I've been like this all my life. I didn't even realize I had it until a few years ago. I guess because I've always been like this I must've learned to adapt, hide, and get around it as a child, but it's worse now. Most people just labeled me as being shy. There is no cure for this disorder.

2) I have Asperger's syndrome which is basically a mild form of autism. No one knows I have this either as I only realized it a few years ago. This also adds to my social awkwardness. People with this disorder often refer to ourselves as being socially retarded. We can sometimes pass for normal, but we're not. We live on Mars while everyone else lives on Earth.

Here's my problem: I need to write a thank you note for a check that was sent to me by my great auntie. I do not want to call her to thank her because I'm terrified to. I'd rather spend a day at the dentist getting my teeth drilled. I've written thank you notes before, but they end up being very lame. I'm currently looking at a website which details what a thank you note should contain, but some of these things don't apply to the situation.

I never ever see auntie. The only communication we have is when she sends me greeting cards with a check in them and I send her a thank you note. I am unable to visit her because of my disorder. I don't know why she doesn't visit me. She's perfectly welcome here, but I honestly don't have much to say to her because I'm unable to make conversation with people. Seeing her is very awkward because of all the silence.

Here is the kind of thing I usually write:
Dear Aunt Jane,
Thank you so much for the generous gift. I'm going to save it for something special - perhaps a concert. Thank you for thinking of me.
Love, lilblu

I should probably write more, but I don't know what to write. I can write a research paper very easily and sometimes I do so just for fun. Heck, I once got an A on a term paper where I only read half the book I was supposed to read. But I cannot write a simple thank you note or anything personal. I end up with writer's block.

Any suggestions for what else to write? Or is this good enough since it's really the thought that counts? Also, I realize I'm supposed to use a blank card, but is it ok to sometimes use one with a thank you message already printed inside? I usually add my own thank you to it, but I feel like a pre-printed one adds a little bulk to it, if you know what I mean.

Your note sounds fine.

Your note is fine, but if I were Auntie, I'd wish for something a little more. And letters are great, because you can write them without actually interacting.

What are you doing lately? Anything mildly interesting, fun, etc.? something to brag about?

Can you add a paragraph that says, "I've been working overtime on a Halloween costume--my friend is having a party, and I want to go as a cowgirl, since I already have the boots. I hope I can wear the skirt again later."

Or, "Work has been particularly rewarding lately--we had a big project, and spent a lot of late hours. The best part is that my boss and coworkers noticed my work."

Or, "I'm experimenting with cooking fish lately--I made some tilapia with Indian spices that was good."

Just one or two sentences that says there is something going on in your life that you're wiling to share with her.

If you tell us what's up in your life, we can help you come up with a sentence.

OP, your note is fine.

shhh its me:
Op I think your note is acceptable but I second Toots suggestion.


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