I'm not sure if I posted about it here, but several months ago my future MIL invited a bunch of LordL's relatives to the wedding without running it by us. Obviously we were upset, particularly since these are people he hasn't seen in 12 or more years and who I've never met in the 9+ years we've dated. But the reports from MIL were that everyone was SO EXCITED to be included, and they were already planning who would carpool with who, and we felt it wasn't a hill to die on - so we invited them. All told it added 15 people to our invite list.
Well, we have now finalized the guest list. Here's how it played out. I heard from ONE household from that group (so on behalf of 2 of the 15 people). They called to RSVP no and sent a card and a generous gift. From everyone else? It's been radio silence. We've gotten a bunch of second hand information from MIL that so and so *might* come, so and so is having medical issues so likely won't, etc. but none of them ever actually contacted me. They live far enough away that I don't expect them to show up without having RSVP'd, so it's not a big deal and overall I'm not surprised. They were probably wondering why they were being invited to a wedding for such distant relatives. I just hope they didn't think it was a gift grab.
Oh, and the relatives MIL swore would send "a VERY nice gift" but not actually come? Yeah they didn't RSVP either and no gifts have arrived (not that I was expecting/feeling entitled to any but she put a lot of emphasis on how generous she expected them to be).
All in all, I'm glad that most of the people coming are ones who I've had active relationships with in the recent past. It will be nice to see familiar faces during the ceremony instead of wondering "hmm, I wonder who that group is!"