General Etiquette > Life...in general

"But he's not dead yet!"

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yokozbornak:
This is a bit of an unprecedented situation for me.  I had been working a very PT job one night per week, but I resigned about a month ago because my DH's changing work schedule and the need for my family time.  I also agreed to continue to be on a "sub" list in case they need emergency help on a night when I am available.  During my last night there, I mentioned to the district manager that my FIL was very ill and had been in ICU and that my DH had been out of state to help his mom, etc.  She followed up with about a week later and asked me how he was doing, and I told her that he was finally on the mend and was expected to be released from the hospital soon.

Today in the mail received a package from the local corporate office that contained a book on grief and a sweet note from someone that I've never met offering condolences on the loss of my FIL.  I am at a loss about how to handle it because FIL is not dead and is headed for a full recovery.  I would just let it go if I were never planning to work there again, but I will most likely end up working at least occasionally for this company so I feel like I should clear the air. AT the same time, I don't want to embarrass anyone who is making an attempt to be kind and thoughtful especially since I have never met this person. 

Would you say anything?  If so, what would be the best approach?

bopper:
You could mention to the district manager what happened...that you are happy that the other employees are supportive, but that your FIL is still alive!

sweetonsno:
Whoops! I'd actually send them a card/email directly. If they are working in an official capacity, they'll pass on the news. If they were just trying to make a nice gesture as an individual, then you aren't going to inadvertently get them in trouble.

Something like this:

Dear Soandso:

Thank you so much for the kind gesture of the card and book, but my FIL hasn't passed away. I may have been unclear about his condition when I was speaking to you/DMů he was ill and in the ICU, but he is expected to make a full recovery. Again, I do appreciate your thoughtfulness and I look forward to working with you again in the future.

Best,
yokozbornak

girlmusic:
Anyone else thinking of Monty Python right now?? "I'm not dead!"

yokozbornak:

--- Quote from: girlmusic on November 15, 2013, 08:04:15 PM ---Anyone else thinking of Monty Python right now?? "I'm not dead!"

--- End quote ---

I was totally going for that! 

I am not sure what role this lady plays in the organization so I may find out before sending anything.  It was truly a kind and thoughtful gesture which is why I am reluctant to say anything, but at the same time, it feels wrong to not acknowledge that she reached out to me and I can't do that without correcting her. 

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