I would never charge. But, if I am available, everyone just assumes I'm cooking and that's that.
To be honest, at my job I have to work every other holiday, and it alternates year to year. This year I had Thanksgiving off, but volunteered to work. Reason being, I couldn't afford to feed everyone. I am divorced, live on my own, haven't had a raise in 4 years, yet my insurance has gone up, and deductibles for prescriptions have gone up, not to mention the cost of food. Plus, in my state, car registrations/inspections are in your birthday month, which is next month, plus Christmas.
My family all has other places to go, but prefer here, which makes me feel good, I just can't do it this year.
I guess the one thing that bothers me about guests, is they do not realize how much money and time go into preparing a big dinner, unless they have done it themselves. I know so many that have never hosted and don't understand. I also am not sympathetic to the ones of "oh, what shall we do?" My response is, make your own dinner!
Sorry, don't mean to sound so bitter, but it seems like some many depend on others for their holiday dinner.