I think you were wrong.
Now, wait, hear me out.
I think you were wrong for not getting offended and letting it show.
I think you were wrong for not saying, "What? No, sorry Friend A, but I invited you to -my- Thanksgiving dinner. If you would like to have your own, that would be fine. We'll miss you."
And hanging up.
And immediately calling everyone you had invited (or a mass text) to say, "Just got the turkey! And the fixings--hope you like brussels sprouts in bacon! I'm looking forward to all the cooking, so I hope you're looking forward to the food! This is going to be fun."
Then when FriendA calls and asks them to come to his house instead of yours, they can say, "Oh, no, I can't, BuffaloFang bought the food already."
Seriously, sometimes we get so focused on being nice that we go there first, when really the appropriate response is, "I -beg- your pardon!"
So, yes, you JADE-ed when you really would have been more powerful to NOT.
Phenomenally rude of them. Just amazingly rude. Incredible.
Apart from the unbelievable rudeness of their request the bit I really liked was it was too far for them to drive so they would prefer you to make the drive instead.
Actually, it wasn't their drive that they were worried about:
Also, they live very far away, so Friend B didn't want to drive that far. . . . Fortunately Friend B's objection tipped the scales,
Friend B didn't want to go to -their- house.
And ditto on the "DON'T CALL THAT WOMAN AND INVITE HER TO HELP YOU COOK!"
(sorry to yell)
Look, she's rude and whiney and selfish and has zero idea of the timing aspects of cooking a large meal and has no boundaries--I'm not being gratuitously insulting; all of these negative attributes are easily deduced from the first request, and greatly underlined by her apparently "begrudging" "agreement" to come to Thanksgiving at your place. And you thought you "ought" to extend this favor to her? That you ought to worry about making her comfortable
You've learned something very important about those friends.
You asked this:
How do you get over this feeling?
I think you get over it by realizing how incredibly presumptuous they were to ask.
Then, of course, you have to get over THAT feeling (nearly being taken advantage of. Going for a long walk will help. As will minimizing the things you invite them for.
And realizing that they are this way, and forgiving them for it. But you also don't