I think this came out OK, and I had a pleasant evening, but I wonder if I could have handled this more smoothly:
Myself, DD, DD's new boyfriend, and the BF's parents went out to dinner. In the negotiations over the restaurant, the "winner" was a Japanese grill, the type of place where you sit around a large hot surface and the chef cooks your food in front of you, usually throwing knives around, chopping with flourish, and setting things on fire for the grand finale.
I love most any Asian cuisine, but I have to approach this carefully. I am allergic to mushrooms and seafood, both of which are common ingredients in dishes. Southeast Asian cooking often involves fish sauce, which obviously could be problematic. I'm sensitive to too much soy, so I also avoid soy sauce and tofu. It's not a life-threatening situation, but I'd rather avoid puffing up or breaking out in front of people. Plus, I've heard some allergies can suddenly turn serious without warning, so I stay away. I don't often eat out at Asian places because of this, so I tried to steer the choices to Chili's or some generic place, but when the majority were so happy about the Japanese place, I didn't see how I could say anything.
When I've been to a restaurant of this type, I try to avoid sitting at the large grill because no matter how hard the chef tries to keep my order separate from the others, it's really fast and pieces fly around into one another's dishes. Plus, since I was meeting the BF and his family for the first time, I was concerned about looking like a snowflake by "directing" the chef.
Naturally, everyone wanted to sit at the grill
. The BF's mother and I had hit it off while visiting at their home, so I tried to inconspicuously take her aside and ask if we could sit at the other end of the restaurant, where there is a kind of make-your-own bowl that you then give to the chef for cooking-separately. I explained about the cross-contamination. She was immediately OK with that, quietly told her husband what the issue was, and it worked out well. I made my bowl as I needed to, and they got all the shrimps and mushrooms for theirs.
I can't see how I messed up (if I did), or if I was a snowflake, but I know you'll "tell it like it is"