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Author Topic: S/O You can't come...Bringing friend to work event  (Read 22384 times)

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Re: S/O You can't come...Bringing friend to work event
« Reply #45 on: December 13, 2013, 05:34:36 AM »
Our Christmas party is next is a catered event being held on site (which we didn't want but oh well).  The sign up sheet specified that you could only bring your spouse or partner and any kids had to be your own.  They have, in the past people bring friends, other relatives, nieces, nephews.  This is for immediate family/long time partners.

It's kind of sad that they actually had to spell this out, but I understand why.

But, this is exactly what this OP is asking about. In my view, an employee with an immediate family (married with kids) is highly privileged in this rationale over someone who is single. So, due to the fact that the OP does not have a significant other, or any kids (my assumption based on the fact that none were mentioned), they get to go alone to an event whereas someone who has married and procreated could be bringing their own version of a soccer team.

I don't know that it is really "sad" to be spelled out, but rather sad that a single person might simply forgo their work festivities, and that people are fine with that when it clearly is not an issue of numbers.

I was not looking at it in that way. I was seeing the problem was that some people were bringing all and sundry and the company was sick of paying for it. I do think that if spouses/significant others are invited, then single people should be allowed to bring a +1 of their choice.


Actually, according to inviteseller, my interpretation was correct:

The reason my company had to institute the rule was because it is a catered event at the facility (we are 24/7 and because of this if they had it off site some people by default of their schedule would not be 'invited') was in the last few years, from what the ED and a few others have told me, people were bringing not only their SO, but parents, siblings, their kids, nieces and nephews.  There was one girl who showed up with her new BF, her mom, aunt, 2 sisters and all their kids (5 or 6 of them).  These companies try to put on something decent, spending a lot of money, for the employees and their spouses/partners and kids as a thank you for all our hard work and to our other halves, a thanks for putting up with sometimes weird hours.  I have set these events up at previous jobs and I always see people take advantage of the companies generosity, be it on or off company property.  I know my ex husbands company had to go to the pay for the +1 because people were bringing anyone for guests and people who didn't care about their behavior because they had no connection with the company were chugging the free alcohol and one guy had a serious drunk driving accident leaving and sued the company..they figured employees would pay for their spouses/partners..not so much for their drunken friend. 

People were taking advantage of the company's generosity. That's the sad part - the fact that people had to be told that it's inappropriate to bring their entire extended family just because it's free.
« Last Edit: December 13, 2013, 07:21:29 AM by KarenK »


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Re: S/O You can't come...Bringing friend to work event
« Reply #46 on: December 13, 2013, 03:07:01 PM »
My previous employer had a lovely dinner provided to all staff, and closed the business during the party so all employees could come.

Some people really made an effort to come and be social and one of our junior employees brought her dog, since he was her family. That was the last one of those parties I attended.

In my current field (higher education), it is important to attend these events for networking purposes and to socialize. When employees do not attend, it is noticed.
ďAll that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost."
-J.R.R Tolkien