Author Topic: Rude woman at restaurant and my kids  (Read 6968 times)

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Twik

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Re: Rude woman at restaurant and my kids
« Reply #30 on: December 06, 2013, 12:17:17 PM »
(headdesk)

People at Joe's Crab Shack are above sitting near children? Are they afraid they won't know the words when the servers start singing "YMCA"?
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Re: Rude woman at restaurant and my kids
« Reply #31 on: December 06, 2013, 12:29:11 PM »
(headdesk)

People at Joe's Crab Shack are above sitting near children? Are they afraid they won't know the words when the servers start singing "YMCA"?

I know!  There have been times that we've been there and it's been so loud that I couldn't hear the kids talking to me and I'm at the same table as them!  I got the feeling that all 4 of the other people were just people who resent kids no matter what. 
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Venus193

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Re: Rude woman at restaurant and my kids
« Reply #32 on: December 06, 2013, 12:32:57 PM »
Better that they moved when they did rather than after being served any food.  That would have subjected you to P/A remarks and the sounds of moving plates, glasses, flatware, etc.

Elfmama

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Re: Rude woman at restaurant and my kids
« Reply #33 on: December 06, 2013, 07:19:24 PM »
She didn't say anything else, and we were moved to the other side of the restaurant, well away from the air duct.
:o :o :o Where do you live, Figgie?  I will move there IMMEDIATELY!!!!!!  Every  restaurant in Maryland has its cold air ducts fiendishly placed so that no matter WHERE you sit, it blows cold air either down your neck or in your face.  And DH won't move more than once.   >:(   I keep a hoodie in the car all summer, just so that I can be comfortable indoors in a public place.
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Piratelvr1121

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Re: Rude woman at restaurant and my kids
« Reply #34 on: December 06, 2013, 08:13:33 PM »
Ooh, too bad you didn't say, "Oh, good!" in a greatly relieved tone of voice with a big smile.


Because that's how I'd feel--that goodness those people weren't going to be near you, making snide little remarks, and sighing, and maybe even admonishing your kids.

AND you didn't have to listen to them being loud and obnoxious themselves.

POD.  Our boys are generally very well behaved in public, often better behaved in restaurants than at home actually.  Were we to run into a woman like this I would have possibly shook my head, shrugged and decided they were doing us a favor, most likely.
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Re: Rude woman at restaurant and my kids
« Reply #35 on: December 07, 2013, 08:06:27 PM »
This is just odd and weird that she did that. Maybe she did have bad experience previously with other kids who disrupted her meal, but that really is on her. Not all kids misbehave, the majority of kids that I've encountered have had very good manners when seated in a restaurant.

Millionaire Maria

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Re: Rude woman at restaurant and my kids
« Reply #36 on: December 07, 2013, 11:17:07 PM »
This is just odd and weird that she did that. Maybe she did have bad experience previously with other kids who disrupted her meal, but that really is on her. Not all kids misbehave, the majority of kids that I've encountered have had very good manners when seated in a restaurant.

And, as a parent, I'd like to say, that most other patrons are perfectly pleasant and even pleased to see my children. We are always encountering people smiling at them, engaging with them, and sympathizing with us when they're difficult.
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Venus193

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Re: Rude woman at restaurant and my kids
« Reply #37 on: December 08, 2013, 08:56:39 AM »
This is just odd and weird that she did that. Maybe she did have bad experience previously with other kids who disrupted her meal, but that really is on her. Not all kids misbehave, the majority of kids that I've encountered have had very good manners when seated in a restaurant.

I think we all need to note when kids are well-behaved.  I was in a diner one Saturday morning near a table with a father and two kids who were about 8 or 9 years old.  They said "Please" and "Thank you" to the waitress without prompting, spoke in whole sentences, and were polite to each other.  They also displayed no impatience while waiting for their food, even deciding to spend the waiting time by making up a ghost story.  The father exchanged greetings with a couple of people and one of the kids commented "Dad's always talking to everybody" but didn't say this in a rude way.

Before I left I complimented the father on raising such polite and intelligent kids.  I think that made his day.

Piratelvr1121

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Re: Rude woman at restaurant and my kids
« Reply #38 on: December 08, 2013, 02:30:11 PM »
It certainly made our day when we once took our elder two out for dinner (before the littlest came along) and a retired school teacher came over our table to tell us we had some of the best behaved children she'd had the pleasure of sitting near. :)

It certainly does the parents and the kids a world of good..
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

ettiquit

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Re: Rude woman at restaurant and my kids
« Reply #39 on: December 08, 2013, 03:30:54 PM »
I think everyone has a right to sit where they'll feel most comfortable, when possible (obviously, airplanes make that difficult). With the OP's situation, I would be more amused than offended, since my DS is pretty good in restaurants. He sometimes has a tendency to talk louder than necessary, but we always correct him on that. If the women in the OP's story hadn't moved, I likely would have, considering how loud they were.

I also applaud the poster who moved away from the grumblers at Joe's Crab Shack. They moved to where they would feel more comfortable, and there's nothing wrong with that. We're not dining with the other patrons at a restaurant, so we have no obligation to stay sitting near someone who makes us uncomfortable. In the OP, the ladies moved because they assumed the kids would be annoying. Wrong or not, they certainly had the right to move. The "Oh great" comment and dirty looks were definitely rude, but not worth engaging.

I've occasionally had strangers comment on how well-behaved my kid is, and it definitely makes my day.

We should all do that more often.  :)

lorelai

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Re: Rude woman at restaurant and my kids
« Reply #40 on: December 08, 2013, 04:16:47 PM »
I've been guilty of doing this but not so blatantly rude. On airplanes I have a tough time with motion sickness so I try very hard to fall asleep, which can be hard to do with loud or crying kids. I also have back issues and have had bad luck with kids kicking my seat. I've had bad luck getting kicking to stop in the past, even with intervention from flight attendants. Most parents grin and say "what can we do, they're kids!" which is frustrating. Even if kids are well behaved, sometimes they just tend to talk/scream loudly in order to be heard, and that doesn't work for me either. I do use earplugs but with really rambunctious kids, they don't seem to help.

I usually fly Southwest so I have a choice where I sit, and I try to sit in front of adults and away from children. I don't make a big deal about it, but if someone with a child ends up sitting directly behind me I do get up and move. I don't make rude gestures or faces, I don't say anything at all. In restaurants, I think it's a little different because you're not in an enclosed space, and I've noticed that kids tend to be a little more well behaved in non-enclosed spaces. So I give everyone a chance. If anyone, adult or child, is doing something that is so outrageous that it interferes with our enjoyment of our meal, then I think it's perfectly alright to request to move elsewhere. (As long as you're discreet).

I've always tried to have compassion for parents dealing with difficult children - my father taught me that a long time ago and reminded me that we were also young once. With my first little one on the way, I'm interested to see how my behavior changes!

catrunning

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Re: Rude woman at restaurant and my kids
« Reply #41 on: December 09, 2013, 12:34:38 PM »
I confess that I will usually try to get a restaurant/airplane seat as far away from infants and young children as possible.    That is because so many young ones do cause considerable disturbance and can be grossly messy with their food.   Unfortunately there are many parents out there either don't care or even encourage the obnoxious behavior because they think it's cute.    That said, I always do it very discretely so as not to offend those parents out there who really are concerned how their kids behave in public and who really try to teach them well.   The problem is you cannot always tell in advance.

And yes, when I go to family-type restaurants, I do expect to hear  "child noise".    But even at child-friendly restaurants, patrons should not have to endure ear-splitting screeching that goes on forever, they should not have to endure having their chair or booth constantly kicked,  they should not have to endure the sight and smell of  diaper changes at the next table,  they should not have to endure getting drooled on by the toddler leaning over from the booth behind them,  etc.    Family restaurants do not equate to "anything goes."

Allyson

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Re: Rude woman at restaurant and my kids
« Reply #42 on: December 09, 2013, 01:46:31 PM »
I don't think it's rude to move because there's a draft, or because there's kids, or any other reason really. It's just rude to make a whole production and drama out of it. What huffing and sighing is supposed to accomplish I will never know, especially since they're already getting what they want and being seated elsewhere! That goes both ways; if you see people moving, and think it might be because of your table, no need to make an issue of it.