Secretrebel, in many cases, an elderly person is emotionally fragile, especially considering the myriad health problems they face. This aunt is in a position of giving up her home and her independence.
I don't know how old you are or if you've ever had close elderly relatives, but imagine that someday you will be in this aunt's position...
BarensMom, I'm afraid I found this post very patronising. Yes, I have elderly relations. I do not lack imagination or compassion. And I have said all along that I don't think Larry should have brought his fiancÚ when she was not welcome.
In this thread I have simply being trying to point out that it is judgemental and unwelcoming to describe Larry's girlfriend as a "total stranger", "not family" and not in a serious relationship (all of which are views that have been expressed in this thread) and for the holiday to be considered 'ruined' by her attendance. It is those views I have been responding to.
But I am now going to bow out of this thread because the imagined viewpoint of an elderly woman moving into assisted living has reached a point of hyperbole that makes it impossible to put any alternative perspective without being characterised as a heartless monster.
I agree with secretrebel completely.
Ditto. I also agree with Perpetua's point that Larry was essentially being shoved between the devil and the deep blue sea, in some ways.
Larry can't bring the GF (and we all agree that he was rude to bring her, uninvited), and Larry probably can't realistically bow out, because it's 'Aunt's last thanksgiving'. I can see how that could be difficult for Larry, if the GF can't go to another celebration.
There's a lot of hyperbole going on here, and a lot of conjecture. What do we know?1) Larry was asked to not bring his GF. We do not know the length of the relationship ('new' can mean virtually anything), whether or not she is usually included, and whether or not the 'no GF/BF' rule affected anybody apart from Larry.
2) Larry brought his GF. We don't know whether that 'ruined' thanksgiving, and we certainly do not know the mind of a lady who none of us have ever met.
Larry could be a serial womaniser who brought some girl he picked up in a bar last night, and aunt could have had a breakdown in the pantry.
Larry could have a serious GF, who he has been seeing for almost a year, and who is usually included but was excluded from this event specifically. Aunt could have rolled her eyes and got somebody to pull up an extra chair.
I could go on. The point is, we don't know anything other than the facts I bolded. Yes, Larry was rude to bring the GF, but he's not necessarily a heinous, old-lady-upsetting monster. Or maybe he is. None of us knows!