Author Topic: Don't make me order "for the table", waiter!  (Read 6576 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

PastryGoddess

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4526
    • My Image Portfolio and Store
Re: Don't make me order "for the table", waiter!
« Reply #15 on: December 29, 2013, 04:37:56 PM »
I eat out at a lot of tapas style places and the above is not true in my experience.  Most places allow you to either order individual plates or you can order a sampler plate.  I've never had a waiter push for person to order for the entire table.  Most of the time me and my dining companions have agreed what on we want to share, but we almost always order individual items as well.

Its not the end of the world if someone has a plate in front of them and someone doesn't.  That's what sangria is for

delabela

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 585
Re: Don't make me order "for the table", waiter!
« Reply #16 on: December 29, 2013, 05:00:55 PM »
In my experience, this has never been an issue, even when at a tapas-style place.  Everyone at the table just orders whatever they intended to, and we do what we will when the plates come (usually sharing, but sometimes not).  I can't really see why the waiter would comment, so I would be taken aback if it happened to me.  I suppose if the waiter was trying to make sure you knew how it was usually done (most dishes shared, usually one is not enough for a meal, etc), but you state you've been to this place multiple times so I'm stumped. 

purple

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 386
Re: Don't make me order "for the table", waiter!
« Reply #17 on: December 29, 2013, 07:00:39 PM »
The waiter was way out of line.  I hope you didn't tip him!

It's a restaurant and you can order anything you want.  You can eat or drink as much as you want to.

I'm vegan and so I understand where you're coming from.  Generally, when I go out to restaurants there are only a couple of things on the menu that I can eat.  Sometimes there's actually nothing on the menu that I can eat, unless I ask for it to be tweaked a bit (please leave the cheese off, no cream, etc).  Sometimes I just order 'side' dishes like steamed veges or rice and ask for it to be made into a meal.  Sometimes I cite my veganism as the reason why I'm not ordering straight off the menu or why I seem to be so fussy, sometimes I don't.  Either way, I'd never put up with a waiter treating me like that.

miranova

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1877
Re: Don't make me order "for the table", waiter!
« Reply #18 on: December 29, 2013, 10:21:29 PM »
At every tapas place I've been to, it is either explained or stated on the menu that the dishes come out as they are ready and will not necessarily come out at the same time.  As long as this is explained, no one should be upset that they aren't eating when someone else is.  That's the nature of tapas, if you don't like the first dish (or can't eat it) you just wait until the next one comes along, which shouldn't be long at all. 

I do think at first the waiter was probably just trying to explain but once you've made clear that you are going to be ordering for yourself only, he needed to back off.  If he wanted to at that point, he could have explained that your dish may not arrive right with the others, that would have been ok but he should not have badgered you to change your order.

Hmmmmm

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 6260
Re: Don't make me order "for the table", waiter!
« Reply #19 on: December 30, 2013, 12:36:00 AM »
I've had waiters at tapas restaurants try to make sure patrons know that a dish that is being ordered wouldn't be enough for everyone at the table to try, like an order of stuffed mussels only has 3 on the plate and there is 4 people at the table.

I'm curious about how he was pushing this or how he even knew that what you were ordering wasn't to share.

Raintree

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 5942
Re: Don't make me order "for the table", waiter!
« Reply #20 on: December 30, 2013, 03:34:56 AM »
I'm curious about how he was pushing this or how he even knew that what you were ordering wasn't to share.

This thread has had me wondering, too. Several posters have indicated that some restaurants will only serve family style, or individual, but not both within the same group, or that they can't control in what order a dish comes out. I am not sure what's to stop someone from ordering a dish, waiting for it to come when it comes, and then putting it in front of the person who wants to eat it instead of in the middle of the table for everyone to take. How would it mess up the server or the kitchen in any way, shape or form, if only one person ate from a particular dish that was brought to the table, and everyone else refrained from eating it?

Cherry91

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 573
Re: Don't make me order "for the table", waiter!
« Reply #21 on: December 30, 2013, 06:59:06 AM »
The waiter's sins:

1. Trying to insist on a style of ordering even when told explicitly why it wouldn't work
2. Treating a customer like they're stupid
3. Judging a customer for their drink choice. Unless you were rolling around drunk (which I doubt), he had no right to pass comment
4. Trying to force you to order more

I don't like to make assumptions (and yet I do it all the time  ::) ) but I suspect that the waiter was trying to increase his tip by increasing the overall bill (10% of $20 is more than 10% of $10, as an example)

NyaChan

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4107
Re: Don't make me order "for the table", waiter!
« Reply #22 on: December 30, 2013, 10:28:38 AM »
I don't think it was wrong of him to point out that one dish each for yourself and your husband wouldn't be enough from his experience.  That's what I consider to be part of his job.  I obviously don't know what restaurant you were at, but I don't think I've ever been to a tapas place where one dish would be sufficient for dinner, especially if I was drinking a good bit (and I'm no lightweight).  Usually our waiters do say something to the effect of - for this size of a group, typically people would order X or Y number.  He should of course have listened when you confirmed what you wanted.

Everything else?  Rude and I would have docked his tip. 

TootsNYC

  • A Pillar of the Forum
  • *****
  • Posts: 30461
Re: Don't make me order "for the table", waiter!
« Reply #23 on: December 30, 2013, 11:15:36 AM »
Quote
The waiter asked when taking our order if we'd be ordering for the table, and I said no.  He suggested we should,

If he wasn't prepared for a "no" answer, then why did he ask this question?

Mikayla

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4043
Re: Don't make me order "for the table", waiter!
« Reply #24 on: December 31, 2013, 12:45:02 PM »
It's obvious the waiter was way out of line.  The only thing to make sure of is that the people you're dining with know what your plans are.

With me, we treated this humorously and my friends ended up using the phrase "Oh, she doesn't shaaaare!".  This was with Chinese food.  I'm not a fan and I don't like most of it.  But obviously it's a popular cuisine and I'll go when this is the group choice.

However, I don't share, because most of what they order isn't something I'll eat.  It's easier to just take me out of the equation.

Twik

  • A Pillar of the Forum
  • *****
  • Posts: 28299
Re: Don't make me order "for the table", waiter!
« Reply #25 on: December 31, 2013, 06:12:25 PM »
Quote
The waiter asked when taking our order if we'd be ordering for the table, and I said no.  He suggested we should,

If he wasn't prepared for a "no" answer, then why did he ask this question?

A very good point. Never offer an option that you don't want the customer to take.
My cousin's memoir of love and loneliness while raising a child with multiple disabilities will be out on Amazon soon! Know the Night, by Maria Mutch, has been called "full of hope, light, and companionship for surviving the small hours of the night."