Author Topic: Best Comeback Ever!  (Read 4964 times)

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Winterlight

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Re: Best Comeback Ever!
« Reply #15 on: January 08, 2014, 12:55:33 PM »
I believe it means he stopped her.
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Amara

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Re: Best Comeback Ever!
« Reply #16 on: January 08, 2014, 01:01:33 PM »
I lived in Waikiki for several years and ran into this constantly. I always answered politely. I think your friend amused herself at the tourist's expense, and I find her behavior uncivil and rude.

VorFemme

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Re: Best Comeback Ever!
« Reply #17 on: January 08, 2014, 01:12:37 PM »
Some people deal with frustration by getting angry - this may cause them to be short with other people that they are having to ask for help because they are just so frustrated that if they say three extra words, they will all be profane ones.

Other people don't mind asking for help & admitting that they don't know the local layout. 

Guess which ones are easier to interact with when they are visiting your area as a tourist (or visiting family, relocating, or whatever reason they have to be there)?

Not the ones who get grumpy because they need to ask for help and they HATE to ask for help....

I've learned to deal with the grumpy ones by telling them the simplest way to get where they want to be or telling them clearly that I don't KNOW either, sorry.  I try not to let them infect me with the grumpiness.

That said, I am NOT a walking GPS - so, asking me where something is three or four times when I don't know is not going to get a different answer.
« Last Edit: January 08, 2014, 01:14:33 PM by VorFemme »
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Luci

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Re: Best Comeback Ever!
« Reply #18 on: January 08, 2014, 01:31:25 PM »
Both were rude.

Tea Drinker

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Re: Best Comeback Ever!
« Reply #19 on: January 08, 2014, 01:37:24 PM »
I think your friend's first "Excuse me?" was reasonable, but once the tourist rephrased his query as a polite sentence, even at high volume, she should have given him a useful answer, possibly of the form "Please don't shout. It's at $address." Otherwise the message the tourist got could be, not "be polite when you want information," but "when people demand that you ask politely, and you do, they still won't help," which probably isn't what she wants to convey.
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Mikayla

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Re: Best Comeback Ever!
« Reply #20 on: January 08, 2014, 01:44:15 PM »
I'm not sure we can say the OP's friend is rude when on this forum we've advocated addressing passive-aggresive comments literally. (Example: Snarky person says "Must be nice to have money to travel so much." Happy Traveler replies, "Yes! Isn't it wonderful?") OP's friend did the same thing: took a rudely stated question and pretended to be clueless about the rude one's intentions when framing a reply.

I think the OP's friend was unhelpful (and can't blame her!) but not rude. But I'm open to a rebuttal!

I totally agree with you on taking PA comments literally, but the problem is that this person wasn't being PA.  He picked a rude way to ask a question, and the OPs friend picked a rude way to respond. 

I liked Amara's way of putting it (that she amused herself at his expense).


veryfluffy

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Re: Best Comeback Ever!
« Reply #21 on: January 08, 2014, 02:00:28 PM »
Really, just because someone is a tourist does not entitle them to assistance from anyone who is passing. If someone rudely stops you and demands you direct them somewhere, you are under no obligation to do so.

Maybe I am too literal-minded, but if someone (rudely) asks a question, and you answer it politely, it isn't rude, even if you did not answer the question the person thought they were asking.
« Last Edit: January 08, 2014, 03:48:09 PM by veryfluffy »
   

emwithme

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Re: Best Comeback Ever!
« Reply #22 on: January 08, 2014, 03:28:01 PM »
I use a similar answer when I'm stopped when shopping by people selling from carts in the middle of shopping centres (they're usually trying to sell something overpriced that I don't want, like some magic crystals that will shrink me or something for my hair, or perfume...you know the type!)

In my area, at least, they all open the conversation the same way:

"Can I ask you a question?"

I reply: "You just did" and carry on my way. 

squeakers

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Re: Best Comeback Ever!
« Reply #23 on: January 08, 2014, 03:44:09 PM »
This is an etiquette forum so you won't see many people applauding "fishsticks!"

I have a hearing impaired sister and DH is getting there too so I am used to people yelling or talking very loud.  If the friend was at work she just left a bad image of her workplace in the mind of the "tourist".  And we all have heard the stories of new owners checking out how employees behave, the "Pretty Woman" syndrome and the "Millionaire dressed shabbily because he was painting his yacht".

So being witty vs helpful is not a good job move.
"I feel sarcasm is the lowest form of wit." "It is so low, in fact, that Miss Manners feels sure you would not want to resort to it yourself, even in your own defense. We do not believe in retaliatory rudeness." Judith Martin

lowspark

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Re: Best Comeback Ever!
« Reply #24 on: January 08, 2014, 03:56:01 PM »
I'm just wondering... how did your friend know this person was a tourist?

Fleur

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Re: Best Comeback Ever!
« Reply #25 on: January 08, 2014, 04:00:25 PM »
This is an etiquette forum so you won't see many people applauding "fishsticks!"

I have a hearing impaired sister and DH is getting there too so I am used to people yelling or talking very loud.  If the friend was at work she just left a bad image of her workplace in the mind of the "tourist".  And we all have heard the stories of new owners checking out how employees behave, the "Pretty Woman" syndrome and the "Millionaire dressed shabbily because he was painting his yacht".

So being witty vs helpful is not a good job move.

While I think that the friend was perhaps a little rude (only slightly, and I'm not even sure about that) I really think that this post is a huge stretch. The likelihood of the shouting tourist being some kind of hidden boss is extremely slim.
« Last Edit: January 08, 2014, 04:02:50 PM by Fleur »

sweetonsno

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Re: Best Comeback Ever!
« Reply #26 on: January 08, 2014, 04:04:08 PM »
I think the friend was rude as well. If she didn't want to help the guy, she should have said, "Sorry, I'm not sure." My guess is that he was either hard of hearing or was having trouble hearing because of noise from the road. It's also possible that your friend only caught the tail end of his first question for whatever reason, and he increased his volume because he thought she couldn't hear him.

This is kind of like the old "May I have this dance?"/"Sure, take it" gag. Yes, an audience might find it funny, but it's really a very nasty way to treat someone whose main crime is asking you for something that you don't care to give them.

Virg

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Re: Best Comeback Ever!
« Reply #27 on: January 08, 2014, 04:07:22 PM »
veryfluffy wrote:

"Really, just because someone is a tourist does not entitle them to assistance from anyone who is passing. If someone rudely stops you and demands you direct them somewhere, you are under no obligation to do so."

Firstly, there's nothing to say this person was a tourist, and secondly, nobody said that he was entitled to assistance.  It's just that if she chose to answer him at all, she was obligated to avoid rudeness in doing so.

"Maybe I am too literal-minded, but if someone (rudely) asks a question, and you answer it politely, it isn't rude, even if you did not answer the question the person thought they were asking."

That is being too literal-minded.  She didn't answer politely, she disguised a wisecrack with polite words.  She could have failed to answer the question at all, answered with "I don't" or "Please stop shouting", or given him directions, and any of those replies would have been polite.  What she did wasn't.

Virg

squeakers

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Re: Best Comeback Ever!
« Reply #28 on: January 08, 2014, 04:10:02 PM »
This is an etiquette forum so you won't see many people applauding "fishsticks!"

I have a hearing impaired sister and DH is getting there too so I am used to people yelling or talking very loud.  If the friend was at work she just left a bad image of her workplace in the mind of the "tourist".  And we all have heard the stories of new owners checking out how employees behave, the "Pretty Woman" syndrome and the "Millionaire dressed shabbily because he was painting his yacht".

So being witty vs helpful is not a good job move.

While I think that the friend was perhaps a little rude (only slightly, and I'm not even sure about that) I really think that this post is a huge stretch. The likelihood of the shouting tourist being some kind of hidden boss is extremely slim.

Any time you are at work where you work with the public you should treat them (the public) like they are your boss.  Does that mean you bend over backwards and twirl flaming batons with your toes? No.  It means you behave professionally.

"I feel sarcasm is the lowest form of wit." "It is so low, in fact, that Miss Manners feels sure you would not want to resort to it yourself, even in your own defense. We do not believe in retaliatory rudeness." Judith Martin

cass2591

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Re: Best Comeback Ever!
« Reply #29 on: January 08, 2014, 04:35:32 PM »
Well, as long as the OP's friend feels pretty good about herself is all that really matters here, isn't it? Never mind she had alternatives, being clever is what's important here, and then bragging on social media.

Thread locked.
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