I don't think there is a one-size-fits-all answer.
In the UK, generally it's assumed that you are dating
only one person. Historically, anyway. However, I think that's changing with the increase in internet dating
/'influence of US TV etc - and there are people who now date more casually. It's only a problem if it's not clear to everyone involved. I wouldn't think that one or two dates necessarily meant a lot and it would be wrong to see someone else as well. Much more than that though is starting to get a bit...userish ...unless you all know about it and want to date casually.
When I met my ex I was already seeing two men on a casual basis (I know, I'm such a tart!) and I told all of them about each other. Ex was a little taken aback I think but carried on. After about 2 weeks of dating
ex I knew I wanted to give us a chance at a proper relationship
, not casual, so dumped the other two (sounds cruel but they knew we were only a temporary thing) and told ex I was no longer seeing anyone else. Those other two men - one had been on the scene for around 2 years, one for a couple of months. I think it's very quickly apparent to you how much you like someone and what you are looking for (at the time I wasn't really wanting a serious relationship
). A decent person spells it out honestly.
Current OH - we met through internet dating
and I think it was on our third date it was brought up and we confirmed had no intention of meeting up with anyone else now. We both cancelled our memberships a couple of weeks later.
more than one person at a time. It doesn't necessarily make you a creep!
"I think it's because to me it comes across a bit like treating people like commodities or trying to pick someone out of a line-up."
My mindset at the time was that I really did not want a serious relationship
(if the right person tripped over me, fine, but I wasn't looking for them). I had other priorities. I still enjoyed going out, having fun with someone, and yes, scrabble. I'm not cut out to live like a nun
. I liked both them men I was seeing, but also both of them were not interested in a proper relationship
either, for their own reasons. And while they were great in small doses, neither of them was the sort of man I'd want as a partner. I am genuinely fond of the one I saw for two years and we are still friends many years after we stopped 'seeing' each other. But we were never, and will never be, truly right for each other romantically.
You don't always have to date with marriage/commitment/long term in mind. I think that can be a big mistake, especially when you are young, as you can end up drifting into something serious with the wrong person.