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  • May 25, 2017, 12:35:49 AM

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Author Topic: What is typical attire for father of the groom in the US?  (Read 767 times)

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snappylt

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What is typical attire for father of the groom in the US?
« on: May 09, 2017, 07:38:25 PM »
What is typical attire for father of the groom in the US?

One of my old college friends will be the father of the groom at a wedding in the fall. He mentioned casually in an e-mail the other day that he'll be renting a tux for the wedding. (He commented something about it being the first time he'll be wearing a tux in many years.)

As far as I know, he is not a groomsman, by the way.

I was a little surprised. I had the impression that the father of the groom and other male guests usually wear regular business suits, and only the groom himself and the groomsmen wear tuxes.

Of course I will say nothing to my old friend! I think he should wear whatever he wants to (and/or whatever his son wants him to wear).

But I am curious. Is a tux typical? (Although no date has been set, I may need to know for myself for the spring of 2019.)

Alicia

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Re: What is typical attire for father of the groom in the US?
« Reply #1 on: May 09, 2017, 07:48:00 PM »
It is common for the father's to either match the groomsmen as they are part of wedding proccesion or to wear very nice version of guest attire. Either way if youbaare the father of bride or groom ideally you will wear what your kid wants.

Harriet Jones

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Re: What is typical attire for father of the groom in the US?
« Reply #2 on: May 09, 2017, 07:52:28 PM »
I'm not sure a tux is *typical* (I haven't been to *that* many weddings), but it wouldn't seem weird to me.

PastryGoddess

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Re: What is typical attire for father of the groom in the US?
« Reply #3 on: May 09, 2017, 10:16:08 PM »
these days a "tux" can be anything from a formal tuxedo, to a morning suit, and everything in between. 

I tend to take it to mean something that is more formal than what the wearer has in their closet.  Sometimes it matches the groomsmen, sometimes it matches the bride or MOB, and sometimes it's whatever he wants to wear.
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Dazi

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Re: What is typical attire for father of the groom in the US?
« Reply #4 on: May 09, 2017, 10:29:14 PM »
IME, the FOG either matches the groomsmen or wears a very nice, new suit. The bride and/or groom may have specified that he match the groomsmen. The other option is that the wedding attire is black tie.

ETA, my own father matched the groomsmen at my request, though his tux was slightly different from theirs.
« Last Edit: May 09, 2017, 10:31:42 PM by Dazi »
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TootsNYC

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Re: What is typical attire for father of the groom in the US?
« Reply #5 on: May 09, 2017, 10:49:37 PM »
I'm not sure a tux is *typical* (I haven't been to *that* many weddings), but it wouldn't seem weird to me.

I've been to lots of weddings. Every one of them that had groomsmen in tuxes also had both fathers in tuxes.

It's mostly so that everyone looks uniform in the photos. And people think of the fathers as being "in the wedding party" (though they are not).


Hmmmmm

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Re: What is typical attire for father of the groom in the US?
« Reply #6 on: May 10, 2017, 09:46:53 AM »
I can only think of the most casual weddings I've attended where the fathers weren't in a tux and then the groomsmen weren't in tuxs either. The father's tux may not be the same style (some men do have their own and prefer wearing it) as the groomsmen but he usually matches the groomsmen in formality.

Thipu1

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Re: What is typical attire for father of the groom in the US?
« Reply #7 on: May 10, 2017, 10:19:25 AM »
If only for the sake of continuity in Wedding pictures, the FOG should probably wear the same sort of clothing as the Groom and other men in the Wedding party. 

gellchom

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Re: What is typical attire for father of the groom in the US?
« Reply #8 on: May 10, 2017, 11:36:51 AM »
It's possible it's a black tie wedding, too, in which case all the male guests should be wearing tuxedos, or else black suits, preferably with white shirts and black neckties.

So the general answer to your question about what is the "typical" attire for fathers depends upon the formality of the wedding.  There is no one-size-fits-all answer for ballroom and beach weddings.

My experience with non-black tie weddings (and as a clergy spouse, I've been to hundreds) is exactly the same as Toots's: if the groom and groomsmen are wearing tuxedos, even though the guests are not, then the fathers do, too.  (In a Jewish wedding, the parents stand with the HC through the ceremony the same as the attendants, if any, do, so I'm not sure whether there is any meaningful distinction about whether they are or are not "in the wedding party.")  But anyway, I too see the dads matching the men in the wedding party.  Similarly, even if the female guests aren't in long gowns, often the mothers are.  In general, it seems like the immediate family are the dressiest people there -- when would you dress up, if not for your own child's or sibling's wedding? --  and it does make sense if only for the photos.  Who is it hurting, anyway?

So you are absolutely right to say nothing to your friend - even if he were making an etiquette blunder, which, it turns out, he is not.

LadyL

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Re: What is typical attire for father of the groom in the US?
« Reply #9 on: May 10, 2017, 02:49:58 PM »
I think the only hard and fast rule is that no wedding attendee should purposefully out-dress the bride or groom - so if the groom wears black tie, the father should not wear white tie. He can either match the groom's formality level or go one step down and wear a suit (especially if the wedding dress code is 'black tie optional'). Both my FIL and father wore black tie to my wedding, as did the groomsmen; my husband wore white tie.

crazycatlady331

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Re: What is typical attire for father of the groom in the US?
« Reply #10 on: May 13, 2017, 12:13:48 PM »
When my sister got married, both my dad and her (eventual) FIL wore suits.  They provided matching ties.