POD. I confront/call out people who are abusing disabled spaces sometimes (my mother who's had walking problems for decades always used to do the same), just as I do/would call out witnessing racism or homophobia. I don't do it in an aggressive way, or where the situation might be unclear, or in circumstances where it might put my own safety in danger, but for me as an activist speaking up against abuse is important. And I agree, I think that etiquette rule relates to calling out non-harmful faux pas, not calling out actual abuse.
"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing."
But how do you know
100% for certain that the person is not
disabled? Appearances can be deceiving. Is the possibility that they MIGHT be perfectly abled really worth harassing someone with an invisible disability like Fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue, or early stages/some forms of MS?
How do you know
for certain that they just haven't put their tag up? How do you know they just keep it in their purse or wallet until it's needed to prevent other drivers of the vehicle from misusing it? How do you know
for certain that they keep it put away until the days they actually
need it so as to not abuse the privilege themselves? And should they really have to deal with you harrassing them over a parking space?
Isn't it honestly better to just let the police sort it out?
I'm not advocating misuse of parking spaces. I'm advocating going through the right channels. The woman was wrong to misuse the parking space. But it is more wrong to confront her without knowing her personal situation and without being absolutely 100% certain that she was not disabled (and not being her dr or someone who knows her well -or at all- means you simply do not have that information).
And honestly, the possibility of a situation escalating is rarely worth it. No one has ever thought 'gee, I must be a jerk' from being confronted by a stranger. Anyone who is enough of a jerk to misuse a parking space is not going to walk away feeling embarrassed or thinking 'I'll never do that again'. They will walk away thinking "Gee, what a nosy [redacted]".
Very rarely are people inclined to examine or change their behaviour based on interference from a stranger they are never likely to see again.
You can speak up to friends and family, but confronting a stranger is rarely the correct thing to do in terms of both etiquette and safety.
Also, calling rudeness "evil" is a slight overstatement. This hardly falls into the category of homophobia or racism.