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  • March 26, 2015, 11:44:39 PM

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Author Topic: declaring someone part of the wedding party  (Read 5288 times)

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mizasparkles

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Re: declaring someone part of the wedding party
« Reply #45 on: February 07, 2015, 01:16:30 PM »
I had a total opposite experience where I was declared to be part of a wedding party without officially being asked. The bride in question was my older cousin. Her younger sister made a comment about how the dress color was perfect for me, and Older Cousin exclaims "But I haven't even asked her yet! Miza, will you be a bridesmaid?" It had just been assumed that I would say yes, and would be part of the wedding party automatically.

I actually didn't mind in the least coming from my family. I love Older Cousin dearly, and was over the moon for her regardless of my wedding party status. Younger Cousin and Aunt knew I would say yes no matter what. Coming from anyone else, however, it would be a little more than rude, IMO.

Lynn2000

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Re: declaring someone part of the wedding party
« Reply #46 on: February 09, 2015, 04:00:54 PM »
Some people place a lot of importance on being part of the wedding party. As I said earlier in the thread, I've never wanted to be a bridesmaid, nor would I want to have any should the opportunity arise. Though, partly that's because I feel they are important, in the relationship they represent, and I don't have anyone who fulfills that relationship for me, so I would rather have none at all, than ask someone I'm not very close to, just to have the role filled.

People get very fraught about it. A friend of mine fully expected that when her cousin got married, Friend and Friend's sister would be asked to be bridesmaids; they are the bride's only female cousins, at least on the side they share (not sure about the other side). Instead the bride had seven bridesmaids, none of whom were Friend or her sister. Friend was so mad. There was talk that Friend could do a reading or something. I believe her exact quote was, "At this point, anything less than being a bridesmaid would be a slap in the face."  :o I had never realized before then how passionate some people can be about this subject. (Friend was not ever asked to be a bridesmaid.)
~Lynn2000

doodlemor

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Re: declaring someone part of the wedding party
« Reply #47 on: February 09, 2015, 07:51:48 PM »
Before my wedding my mother told my aunt that my cousin was going to be my MOH, without consulting me.  I was flabbergasted, and had already asked a college friend. 

I now wish that I had just had them both as attendants, but at that time my mother had already been so pushy and demanding about other aspects of the wedding that I made her undo what she had done.  I have no idea what she said to my aunt, but I feel rather bad about it all of these years later.

LtPowers

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Re: declaring someone part of the wedding party
« Reply #48 on: February 10, 2015, 02:23:09 PM »
Before my wedding my mother told my aunt that my cousin was going to be my MOH, without consulting me.  I was flabbergasted, and had already asked a college friend. 

I now wish that I had just had them both as attendants, but at that time my mother had already been so pushy and demanding about other aspects of the wedding that I made her undo what she had done.  I have no idea what she said to my aunt, but I feel rather bad about it all of these years later.

Whyever would you feel bad about it? You did nothing wrong.


Powers  &8^]