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  • June 26, 2017, 05:36:20 AM

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Author Topic: not enough seating - is this new?  (Read 989 times)

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gellchom

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Re: not enough seating - is this new?
« Reply #15 on: June 19, 2017, 10:26:55 PM »
I, too, have been to a few receptions like this over the years, and I can tell you that most guests hate them.  No one says a word to the hosts, but they roll their eyes to each other.  It definitely doesn't make people mingle more; it makes them leave early (and it makes older guests feel unwelcome).

For a cocktail hour between the ceremony and the dinner, you don't need to have enough seats for everyone (and in my experience, no one does), but you do need to have enough seats for your elderly and mobility impaired guests to sit down.

It's fine to have just appetizers or just desserts for a reception, but you still have to have enough seating for everyone (and be prepared for people not staying as long). 
 
I agree, it does not have the breezy, mingly, cocktail party groove that the hosts imagine.  It just feels inconsiderate and uncomfortable.  (For that matter, people like to sit at cocktail parties, too.)  I'm not mobility impaired, and I can dance and walk comfortably in high heels, but standing still in them for long stretches is rough.

In addition, there are usually just a few little high top tables.  So those fill up very quickly with dirty plates, napkins, and glasses, and unless you have an awful lot of servers, guests have no place to put anything down.  If I have a drink in one hand and a plate in the other (not to mention a pocketbook), it's impossible to eat anything on the plate.  If it's food that requires a knife and fork, you really need both hands and a table.  Guests end up drifting out into the hall of the venue to find places to sit or at least to put things down.  This isn't a problem for cocktail hours, in my experience, because people aren't eating as much as they do when that is the only food for the evening, and most of the items are tiny pickups that servers pass; nothing you need a fork or a plate to eat.

Why anyone is recommending this is beyond me.  I've never heard anyone say they like it, let alone prefer it.  Maybe venue owners are trying to maximize the number of guests the hosts can squeeze into the venue, so that they will make more money on liquor.

sammycat

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Re: not enough seating - is this new?
« Reply #16 on: June 20, 2017, 12:43:56 AM »
I've walked out of events that have had insufficient seating before.  I haven't encountered it a wedding yet, but I would also walk out if I did end up at a wedding like this, and take my present with me. (All the weddings I've been too have been sit down two or three course or buffet events, and I hope they stay that way).

It's completely and utterly rude, for all the reasons mentioned by PP; no exceptions.

goldilocks

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Re: not enough seating - is this new?
« Reply #17 on: June 20, 2017, 10:48:10 AM »
Yes, I did notice the entire bridal party had a table reserved.   Apparently they don't have to mingle, just the rest of us.

Really I think what happened is the bride selected this venue and when they realized it wasn't big enough, they just decided to "make do".   Big mistake in my opinion.

Zizi-K

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Re: not enough seating - is this new?
« Reply #18 on: June 20, 2017, 10:58:10 AM »
I have found that a greater demand for seating than there is supply does not have the intended effect of causing people to get up and mingle. Quite the opposite, people that get seats first are terrified to lose them, so they refuse to budge from them during the whole event. Or, they camp out with close friends or family, who save the seats while people make food or beverage runs. It's terrible, IMO.

HannahGrace

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Re: not enough seating - is this new?
« Reply #19 on: June 20, 2017, 11:16:35 AM »
Curious, was this the same wedding you posted about with the loud band?

TeamBhakta

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Re: not enough seating - is this new?
« Reply #20 on: June 20, 2017, 11:25:39 AM »
Yes, I did notice the entire bridal party had a table reserved.   Apparently they don't have to mingle, just the rest of us.

Really I think what happened is the bride selected this venue and when they realized it wasn't big enough, they just decided to "make do".   Big mistake in my opinion.

Ah, the good old A-list vs B-list approach  :P

BigBadBetty

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Re: not enough seating - is this new?
« Reply #21 on: June 20, 2017, 12:28:27 PM »
I have found that a greater demand for seating than there is supply does not have the intended effect of causing people to get up and mingle. Quite the opposite, people that get seats first are terrified to lose them, so they refuse to budge from them during the whole event. Or, they camp out with close friends or family, who save the seats while people make food or beverage runs. It's terrible, IMO.
This has been my experience, too. I have never been to a wedding where this happened. However, I have been to other events where there has been a shortage of seats. People are terrified of losing their seats. Other people are like vultures waiting for a seat to open. While I am in relatively good health, I am a complete klutz. I cannot eat, hold a drink and maintain my balance at the same time.

goldilocks

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Re: not enough seating - is this new?
« Reply #22 on: June 20, 2017, 04:07:50 PM »
Curious, was this the same wedding you posted about with the loud band?

Yes.   I didn't really enjoy this wedding very much.