Health Advice When You're Pregnant, Everyone Has Some

[Lauds]

I think the reason the list of things pregnant women shouldn't eat/drink/do is so long is that there are lots of things that could pose a risk to the unborn baby but no one is willing to test pregnant women to find out, mostly due to the ethics of such an experiment. So what we know comes from animal studies which may not be the same as in humans, or from long running studies that look at a whole range of things but are few and far between. So, in the absence of known limits and actual risks, medics err on the side of caution and recommend avoiding something entirely just in case.

[Alli8098]

I will admit that I was a judgy breastfeeding person before giving birth to my first.  Someone said she nursed for 6 weeks and I was thinking some not nice things about how easily they gave up.  Guess who didn't even make it 2 weeks breastfeeding my first?  Humble pie for me. but my second one is breastfed and has been for 6 months.  I have been tired as the baby has been getting up in the night for an extra feeding My mother in law made a crack about how if i still "Insisted on nursing." 

I tried for two months, I was in tears half the time thinking I wasn't trying hard enough.  For some reason I just couldn't seem to make enough milk for DD.  So we just went to formula and my DH was there for me assuring me that I wasn't a bad mother.  That DD was getting a healthy alternative, and that she would be just fine.  I am going to try again with DS and hope I have more success.  My mother assured me that just because my body didn't cooperate the first time does not mean it won't the second time.

[KimberlyM]

I will admit that I was a judgy breastfeeding person before giving birth to my first.  Someone said she nursed for 6 weeks and I was thinking some not nice things about how easily they gave up.  Guess who didn't even make it 2 weeks breastfeeding my first?  Humble pie for me. but my second one is breastfed and has been for 6 months.  I have been tired as the baby has been getting up in the night for an extra feeding My mother in law made a crack about how if i still "Insisted on nursing." 

I tried for two months, I was in tears half the time thinking I wasn't trying hard enough.  For some reason I just couldn't seem to make enough milk for DD.  So we just went to formula and my DH was there for me assuring me that I wasn't a bad mother.  That DD was getting a healthy alternative, and that she would be just fine.  I am going to try again with DS and hope I have more success.  My mother assured me that just because my body didn't cooperate the first time does not mean it won't the second time.

I barely made it 4 weeks with my first and it as a nightmare.  I expected the same with number 2, but he latched on immediately after birth, and he happily nursed for 14 months without a single problem.  They're all different!

[Ceallach]

I will admit that I was a judgy breastfeeding person before giving birth to my first.  Someone said she nursed for 6 weeks and I was thinking some not nice things about how easily they gave up.  Guess who didn't even make it 2 weeks breastfeeding my first?  Humble pie for me. but my second one is breastfed and has been for 6 months.  I have been tired as the baby has been getting up in the night for an extra feeding My mother in law made a crack about how if i still "Insisted on nursing." 

I tried for two months, I was in tears half the time thinking I wasn't trying hard enough.  For some reason I just couldn't seem to make enough milk for DD.  So we just went to formula and my DH was there for me assuring me that I wasn't a bad mother.  That DD was getting a healthy alternative, and that she would be just fine.  I am going to try again with DS and hope I have more success.  My mother assured me that just because my body didn't cooperate the first time does not mean it won't the second time.

It can work the other way too, I have to keep reminding myself.    I had no trouble feeding DS, easy peasy and he was a milk guzzler (only problem was I struggled to eat enough to give my body nutrition too, I literally wasted away to an incredibly skinny frame, while he grew big and plump!)  but it might not be the same for a number two.    I know a lady who fed her first 3 babies without issue but the fourth baby had so many problems with latch, supply, and painful complications.  She ended up having to pump and even that was painful and not working right.    Every baby is different and our body responds differently each time as well!   So I'm going to try to go into this the same as I did with my first one - be flexible, be adaptable, and be open-minded!   Otherwise I'll end up miserable when my idea of how things should be doesn't match up with reality....

[Southern_Continent]

I'm 26 weeks right now and the "oh, let me help you, don't carry that" drives me nuts. I'll let you know if I need help. I've cut my weightlifting way back, but I'm still pressing 55lbs overhead, deadlifting 90lbs, doing pushups, dips, pullups, I can handle carrying most stuff...

My worst story is the neighbor who told me, as I made my way painfully and slowly out of the house for the first time after my MC to get the mail, that she just knew it was all that exercising she saw me doing and that maybe next time I'll listen to my dr. I should have done the silence thing, but I told her she was completely wrong, he didn't form right, and that my dr was 100% on board with my exercise routine and said it was absolutely not related. I can't hardly stand to look at her. She peeks out her windows at me now as I slowly jog by...I'm always tempted to make a gesture that is not etiquette-approved.

[Katana_Geldar]

What an awful terribly under informed woman! Since when is a MC your fault? Most of the time it isn't.

[MrsJWine]

I'm 26 weeks right now and the "oh, let me help you, don't carry that" drives me nuts. I'll let you know if I need help. I've cut my weightlifting way back, but I'm still pressing 55lbs overhead, deadlifting 90lbs, doing pushups, dips, pullups, I can handle carrying most stuff...

The best part is that they don't blink an eye at a pregnant mom carrying around her firstborn, no matter how large.

[Ceallach]

I'm 26 weeks right now and the "oh, let me help you, don't carry that" drives me nuts. I'll let you know if I need help. I've cut my weightlifting way back, but I'm still pressing 55lbs overhead, deadlifting 90lbs, doing pushups, dips, pullups, I can handle carrying most stuff...

The best part is that they don't blink an eye at a pregnant mom carrying around her firstborn, no matter how large.

Glad I don't have nosy neighbours - I literally crawled around in the backyard with my 1 year old sitting on my back playing "horsey" this afternoon.   I was even neighing like a horse!    Even if I weren't in my 2nd trimester of pregnancy they might think I was crazy.

[Gyburc]

I will admit that I was a judgy breastfeeding person before giving birth to my first.  Someone said she nursed for 6 weeks and I was thinking some not nice things about how easily they gave up.  Guess who didn't even make it 2 weeks breastfeeding my first?  Humble pie for me. but my second one is breastfed and has been for 6 months.  I have been tired as the baby has been getting up in the night for an extra feeding My mother in law made a crack about how if i still "Insisted on nursing." 

I tried for two months, I was in tears half the time thinking I wasn't trying hard enough.  For some reason I just couldn't seem to make enough milk for DD.  So we just went to formula and my DH was there for me assuring me that I wasn't a bad mother.  That DD was getting a healthy alternative, and that she would be just fine.  I am going to try again with DS and hope I have more success.  My mother assured me that just because my body didn't cooperate the first time does not mean it won't the second time.

It can work the other way too, I have to keep reminding myself.    I had no trouble feeding DS, easy peasy and he was a milk guzzler (only problem was I struggled to eat enough to give my body nutrition too, I literally wasted away to an incredibly skinny frame, while he grew big and plump!)  but it might not be the same for a number two.    I know a lady who fed her first 3 babies without issue but the fourth baby had so many problems with latch, supply, and painful complications.  She ended up having to pump and even that was painful and not working right.    Every baby is different and our body responds differently each time as well!   So I'm going to try to go into this the same as I did with my first one - be flexible, be adaptable, and be open-minded!   Otherwise I'll end up miserable when my idea of how things should be doesn't match up with reality....

I think the words 'be flexible, be adaptable and be open-minded' should be printed on a t-shirt and given to all first-time parents. FWIW, I had Little G in late November and we had quite a bit of difficulty with feeding. I've ended up giving him both breast and formula, and he seems to be thriving, fortunately.

A bit more on topic - I've been very lucky so far with people's comments and advice - only the one problem encounter so far:

I ran into the mother of a friend of mine who told me little G was hungry (he was crying because he was in an unfamiliar place and had just been woken up). I said he had been fed less than an hour previously so I didn't think he needed any more right then.

She said: 'Yes, but newborns need to eat little and often. This is your first baby, isn't it?' Of course, she had me second-guessing myself, despite the fact that she had had roughly 3 minutes' acquaintance with little G at that point, and at 8 weeks he wasn't exactly a newborn any more... So I took a deep breath and smiled politely, and fortunately she shut up.

[Lynda_34]

This has been an interesting thread.  My babies are 28 and 32 years.
I work with  a man whose wife is 7 months pregnant.  He was telling me about all the advice she was getting.  I told him well here's some more. He looked apprehensive and I gave him these non committal phrases and he thought they were great.

I'll have to think about that.
My doctor/the pediatrician told me this was ok.
That sounds like a good idea.

I breast fed them both with supplemental bottles for about 3 months.  They weaned themselves.  It is very humbling to be "spit out."  They're fine today.

[alkira6]

My worst story is the neighbor who told me, as I made my way painfully and slowly out of the house for the first time after my MC to get the mail, that she just knew it was all that exercising she saw me doing and that maybe next time I'll listen to my dr. I should have done the silence thing, but I told her she was completely wrong, he didn't form right, and that my dr was 100% on board with my exercise routine and said it was absolutely not related. I can't hardly stand to look at her. She peeks out her windows at me now as I slowly jog by...I'm always tempted to make a gesture that is not etiquette-approved.

When I had my last MC I had an old biddy (so named because I can't call her what I really want) try to tell me that God was punishing me for not knowing a woman's place because I *gasp* was still working fulltime and going to school.

I said some very not nice things at a very loud volume.

That aside, the only advise I give pregnant women is when they ask for it.  I tend to have really good natural remedies for nausea and home made diaper rash cream.

[Katana_Geldar]

My dad asked me last week if I'd been reaching up a lot as he said it can mean the cord is looped around the neck. I tried to laugh it off, saying that I'd looked it up and there wasn't anything to it and the cord around the neck is usually not much of a problem unless it's really constiucted.

[Coralreef]

LOL! 

Sorry if this changes the topic a bit, but my two pieces of parenting advice to new parents are:

1) Always stand perpendicular to the baby during a diaper change.  (It's amazing how far things can squirt, and you don't want to be in the line of fire.)

2) You are the parents and decide what's best/right for the baby.  No matter what anyone else (non-medical) tells you, the final decision is yours, and that makes it the right one.

For the new parents, I only advise to sleep whenever the baby sleeps.

[MommyPenguin]

Just don't advise this for people who are having a child who isn't their first.  I got soooo sick of hearing that when it was my third.  The baby might be sleeping, but my 3-year-old sure wasn't! 

[Ceallach]

LOL! 

Sorry if this changes the topic a bit, but my two pieces of parenting advice to new parents are:

1) Always stand perpendicular to the baby during a diaper change.  (It's amazing how far things can squirt, and you don't want to be in the line of fire.)

2) You are the parents and decide what's best/right for the baby.  No matter what anyone else (non-medical) tells you, the final decision is yours, and that makes it the right one.

For the new parents, I only advise to sleep whenever the baby sleeps.

Oh I loathed that advice with a passion when I had my first baby!   I could list all of the reasons but.... let's just say I didn't think it was very practical advice.