Author Topic: The Contessa  (Read 3309 times)

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Thipu1

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The Contessa
« on: February 05, 2014, 11:31:36 AM »
For several reasons, it was decided that I would spend the night before my Wedding at the home of the MOH and her sister.  It was to be a quiet little party.  We'd go out to a nice local bistro for dinner, (my treat), share a bottle of wine and get to bed early. 

When I arrived, they already had a guest for the evening.  It was the Contessa and she was at the garrulous drunk stage. She had an amazing story to tell and I was to get the full benefit of it.

She was a teacher when she met the man of her dreams.  He belonged to an illustrious Italian family and they were to be married.  The Wedding would be held at his ancestral home in Tuscany.  No expense was to be spared.  Her relatives would be flown in and housed at the expense of the Groom and his family.  Her dress would cost XX thousand dollars.  Her jewelry would cost XXX thousand dollars.  On and on she went. 

Now comes the drama.  About two weeks before this extravaganza was due to happen, the Groom stated that, once they were married she would certainly give up her career and devote herself to his happiness. 

That tore it!  She called everything off on the spot. 

What then followed was a tirade about the perfidy of men and the 'slavery' of marriage.  Just the thing you want to hear on the night before your Wedding, right?

Oh yes, the Contessa had gotten hungry earlier in the evening so the sisters had ordered in food.  There were left-overs in the fridge if I wanted anything. 

To try to bean dip, I showed her the pearls my ILs had given me as part of our Wedding gifts. She sniffed.  'They are pretty but, you know, they are cultured'. 

I almost bit my tongue in half not to reply, 'yes, I know they are.  It's a shame you're not'. 

When the Contessa passed out on the sofa, the Bridezilla in me came out. I informed the sisters that she had to be out of here before my mother arrived in the morning.  Eventually, she was poured into a taxi and taken home.  I paid for that.

While I doubt that the Contessa's story was completely truthful, I can assure readers the proceedings of the evening happened exactly as I've related them here. 


Kaypeep

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Re: The Contessa
« Reply #1 on: February 05, 2014, 12:06:40 PM »
I think the real problem here was your MOH who knew this was a special evening, and she allowed this extra guest to tag along and monopolize everything and throw your plans off track.

lady_disdain

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Re: The Contessa
« Reply #2 on: February 05, 2014, 03:34:07 PM »
Oh, dear.

You know, people putting down marriage to brides seem to be amazingly common. When my sister got married, she had a very small wedding, with exquisite food. She knew she didn't want the traditional wedding cake so I took her to this little French bakery that is divine. We sat down with the chef to tell him what she needed and sort everything out. He showed us a delicious cake, filled with mango cream and covered in a snowy white coconut frosting, decorated with flecks of gold. Perfect! Then, he heard it was to be her wedding cake. We got treated to a long diatribe against marriage, how it changes everything, how couples got along perfectly well until they married, etc, etc, etc.

The cake was good enough for us to ignore his rants and get it anyway.

Magnet

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Re: The Contessa
« Reply #3 on: February 05, 2014, 07:42:47 PM »
I'm sorry that this happened to you and the non-Contessa sounds like a pill.

I agree that some topics trigger people to tell horrible stories and marriage is certainly one of them.  It is an odd reaction that, not surprisingly, is held by people who had a bad marriage. 

Promise

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Re: The Contessa
« Reply #4 on: February 05, 2014, 10:40:16 PM »
How odd that she chose this night of all nights to have this woman there. I suppose it gave you a good story to share down through the years... but still, so odd. I wish you could have had the night you anticipated instead of what you got!

Twik

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Re: The Contessa
« Reply #5 on: February 06, 2014, 05:17:14 PM »
It always reminds me of the Ogden Nash poem:

"Cuckoos lead Bohemian lives,
They fail as husbands, and as wives.
Therefore, they cynically disparage
Everybody else's marriage."
My cousin's memoir of love and loneliness while raising a child with multiple disabilities will be out on Amazon soon! Know the Night, by Maria Mutch, has been called "full of hope, light, and companionship for surviving the small hours of the night."

Lynda_34

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Re: The Contessa
« Reply #6 on: February 08, 2014, 10:56:30 PM »
You have my sympathy, she reaped what she sowed.

I'd have called a restaurant that delivered and as happened poured this woman into a taxi and waited a week and sent her a sympathy card.
Please give us feedback, how was your wedding and how are things going?

Thipu1

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Re: The Contessa
« Reply #7 on: February 09, 2014, 06:51:44 PM »
Thank you for your concern but the Contessa story was a blast from the past I never got around to posting on the original incarnation of E-Hell. 

We were married in 1983.  The Wedding went off beautifully and we're still quite happily chugging along.  Our 31st anniversary will be next month. 

BarensMom

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Re: The Contessa
« Reply #8 on: February 09, 2014, 09:36:35 PM »
But Thipu1, did you ever see the Contessa again?

Thipu1

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Re: The Contessa
« Reply #9 on: February 10, 2014, 08:54:38 AM »
But Thipu1, did you ever see the Contessa again?

Nope.  I never saw her before that night and never saw her again. 

lady_disdain

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Re: The Contessa
« Reply #10 on: February 10, 2014, 09:16:03 AM »
But Thipu1, did you ever see the Contessa again?

Nope.  I never saw her before that night and never saw her again. 

And I can just imagine how sad that makes you. Although it does seem like a treasure trove of eHell stories got away ;)

Thipu1

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Re: The Contessa
« Reply #11 on: February 10, 2014, 10:06:18 AM »
But Thipu1, did you ever see the Contessa again?

Nope.  I never saw her before that night and never saw her again. 

And I can just imagine how sad that makes you. Although it does seem like a treasure trove of eHell stories got away ;)

Oh, I'm sure there are plenty out there.  No matter how lovely a Wedding is, almost every Bride experiences the 'Death of a Thousand Paper Cuts' during the planning.  Each one seems like an annoying little quibble at the time but, if you put them all together, the result might almost qualify as a Marx Brothers movie. 

I've got a lot of funny stories about our Wedding but there's no place to put them here. 

lowspark

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Re: The Contessa
« Reply #12 on: February 11, 2014, 03:51:30 PM »
Oh, dear.

You know, people putting down marriage to brides seem to be amazingly common.
<snip>

I think it's amazingly common for people to badmouth other people's happiness. At least that's been my experience. (And I've never understood it although I imagine a great deal of it stems from jealousy.)

Not related to this topic but along the same lines, I'll never forget attending the baby shower of a friend many years ago. The vast majority of the invited guests, friends of the mother-to-be, had never had a child. I spent the entire party cringing at the comments people made about the perceived/expected pain of childbirth and the horrors of actually having to take care of a baby. I mean the comments were insulting, rude and relentless.

I just thought, well, she's going to have that baby. No going back now! So can't we just try to be happy for her? I tried throwing in a few comments about how the pain was temporary but worth it considering how rewarding having a child was (my own son was maybe about two years old at the time) but it was like swimming against the tide. Oh well, they were her friends!

lady_disdain

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Re: The Contessa
« Reply #13 on: February 11, 2014, 04:26:30 PM »
Talking about the horrors of child birth seems to be an almost integral part of baby showers. I think it is so the mother can say, in most cases, "well, it wasn't as bad as I was expecting."

lowspark

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Re: The Contessa
« Reply #14 on: February 11, 2014, 04:33:41 PM »
Well, yeah, sure, a comment here and there is normal although I still find it to be in bad taste. But this was an ongoing barrage throughout the entire gift-opening process. They just wouldn't stop.

And again, these were women who had not had any children, essentially saying, "How awful it must be to be pregnant; How awful it will be to give birth; How awful it will be to take care of a baby." It was not at all what I would remotely consider to be appropriate conversation at a baby shower, a party whose specific purpose is to celebrate the pregnancy and impending birth.