Author Topic: No dinner?  (Read 10020 times)

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shhh its me

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Re: No dinner?
« Reply #60 on: February 12, 2014, 03:30:37 PM »

With that said, my family member isn't the first I've noticed doing this type of thing lately.  I really hope this isn't turning into some trend because I have also read about it on money saving websites "just have cake!".  Although I'm pretty sure the advice is meant for the reader to take in consideration the time of day they are planning to just have cake.

PB&J and bologna sandwiches cost that much?

I'm not sure that peanut butter would fly these days.

I can see the appeal of a cake only party for logistics - you don't have to prepare a meal and clean it up in addition to the rest of the party stuff, you don't have to worry about food allergies and picky children demanding alternate meals, or figure out quantities based on how many parents and siblings show up, or need to serve something that also appeals to the parents.  *But*, if you want to do that, you have the party at 2-4 on a Saturday afternoon, not 6-8 in the evening.

I even think you can do a shorter party at dinner time from 6-7 and serve only cake. 

blarg314

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Re: No dinner?
« Reply #61 on: February 12, 2014, 07:59:42 PM »

With that said, my family member isn't the first I've noticed doing this type of thing lately.  I really hope this isn't turning into some trend because I have also read about it on money saving websites "just have cake!".  Although I'm pretty sure the advice is meant for the reader to take in consideration the time of day they are planning to just have cake.

PB&J and bologna sandwiches cost that much?

I'm not sure that peanut butter would fly these days.

I can see the appeal of a cake only party for logistics - you don't have to prepare a meal and clean it up in addition to the rest of the party stuff, you don't have to worry about food allergies and picky children demanding alternate meals, or figure out quantities based on how many parents and siblings show up, or need to serve something that also appeals to the parents.  *But*, if you want to do that, you have the party at 2-4 on a Saturday afternoon, not 6-8 in the evening.

I even think you can do a shorter party at dinner time from 6-7 and serve only cake.

I don't think even that would be appropriate. It's right in the middle of the dinner hour, and that one hour party is likely to take up two hours of your time or more, when you include getting the kid ready, driving to and from, and parking, which ends up covering most of the dinner period. If you have to get fast food and feed the kids in the car because you don't have time to cook and eat due to the party, or you need to make dinner the day in advance so it's ready the moment you get home, it's still an imposition on the guests for the convenience of the host. 

Bottom line - if your party overlaps the usual dinner period, even if it's short, you still need to serve dinner. And with kids, the limits are tighter than for adults, because kids tend to be worse at handling being hungry and cranky. 


Dindrane

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Re: No dinner?
« Reply #62 on: February 12, 2014, 10:39:50 PM »
Pretty much the entire point in having etiquette rules about proper hosting surrounding meal periods is to prevent people from feeling the way you did.

I wouldn't say it's the entire point--I think the point is also to keep little kids from being so hungry they're shaky, bcs their moms assumed that the hosting would involve some level of an actual meal.   ;)

Fair enough. :) I'd say the two are equally strong considerations in why the etiquette rule exists, though.


StillandSilent

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Re: No dinner?
« Reply #63 on: February 13, 2014, 06:59:15 AM »
I'm surprised that those places allow fod at all.  I just imagine a bunch of little kids slamming pizza and pop, the jumping around and....yeah, barf time.

shhh its me

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Re: No dinner?
« Reply #64 on: February 13, 2014, 07:18:50 AM »

With that said, my family member isn't the first I've noticed doing this type of thing lately.  I really hope this isn't turning into some trend because I have also read about it on money saving websites "just have cake!".  Although I'm pretty sure the advice is meant for the reader to take in consideration the time of day they are planning to just have cake.

PB&J and bologna sandwiches cost that much?

I'm not sure that peanut butter would fly these days.

I can see the appeal of a cake only party for logistics - you don't have to prepare a meal and clean it up in addition to the rest of the party stuff, you don't have to worry about food allergies and picky children demanding alternate meals, or figure out quantities based on how many parents and siblings show up, or need to serve something that also appeals to the parents.  *But*, if you want to do that, you have the party at 2-4 on a Saturday afternoon, not 6-8 in the evening.

I even think you can do a shorter party at dinner time from 6-7 and serve only cake.

I don't think even that would be appropriate. It's right in the middle of the dinner hour, and that one hour party is likely to take up two hours of your time or more, when you include getting the kid ready, driving to and from, and parking, which ends up covering most of the dinner period. If you have to get fast food and feed the kids in the car because you don't have time to cook and eat due to the party, or you need to make dinner the day in advance so it's ready the moment you get home, it's still an imposition on the guests for the convenience of the host. 

Bottom line - if your party overlaps the usual dinner period, even if it's short, you still need to serve dinner. And with kids, the limits are tighter than for adults, because kids tend to be worse at handling being hungry and cranky.
I don't think it would be ideal but the duration for a child's birthday party would be a big  "no dinner"  clue(it would be better to actually say "cake and ice cream " or whatever.)   Similar to a one hour cocktail party would indicate no meal light apps only.

mj

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Re: No dinner?
« Reply #65 on: February 13, 2014, 09:07:55 AM »
Unless they said "no dinner" or "only cake and ice cream", the one hour 6 - 7 party would really confuse me.  But I'm with a pp that noted that a 1 hour party is still a 2 hour event for the guests, so it's eating directly into the dinner hour. 

A 2 - 4 party would go over much better with just cake.

StuffedGrapeLeaves

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Re: No dinner?
« Reply #66 on: February 13, 2014, 09:46:36 AM »
I'm surprised that those places allow fod at all.  I just imagine a bunch of little kids slamming pizza and pop, the jumping around and....yeah, barf time.

I am not sure about this specific place, but the bouncy places in our area usually do one hour of play, and then one hour of pizza and cake at a separate room during a two-hour party.  So they are not eating and playing at the same time. 

Winterlight

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Re: No dinner?
« Reply #67 on: February 13, 2014, 10:12:18 AM »
Unless they said "no dinner" or "only cake and ice cream", the one hour 6 - 7 party would really confuse me.  But I'm with a pp that noted that a 1 hour party is still a 2 hour event for the guests, so it's eating directly into the dinner hour. 

A 2 - 4 party would go over much better with just cake.

Agreed. That's not really enough time to do anything- games or presents or whatever. 2-4 makes more sense, especially considering the ages of the guests.
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Polly

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Re: No dinner?
« Reply #68 on: February 13, 2014, 05:10:05 PM »
Good grief. I don't have children but I have encountered them on occasion :-) and I cannot begin to imagine how cranky a room full of tired, hungry three-year-olds might be. Kids that age (and older) need to eat every couple of hours - missing a meal and being out till 9pm just sounds crazy. If it were an adult party to which children allowed to come along, and the hosts didn't have children I'd not be too surprised as if you haven't experienced children you might have no idea how often they need to eat and sleep. But to have this arrangement at a children's party is odd and probably rude, I think.

Every time I am around young children I am just dumbfounded by the amount of eating and sleeping that goes on! Even when a friend visited me last year with her 9- and 11-year-old, the days were just organised around food! Then another friend came with her 2.5-year-old and we could barely leave the house without having to rush back for naps/food. As someone who eats and sleeps pretty much when I feel like it, sometimes not at all, sometimes loads, I just found it baffling! But now I know - kids need to eat and sleep, it's pretty natural :-) 

TootsNYC

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Re: No dinner?
« Reply #69 on: February 13, 2014, 05:16:56 PM »
I don't have children but I have encountered them on occasion :-)


 :D :D


I know what you mean about "the amount of eating and sleeping that goes on." Sometimes I think that babies live about 4 days in one of ours (wake, play, eat, sleep = one day), and toddlers who still take naps live at least 2.

metallicafan

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Re: No dinner?
« Reply #70 on: February 13, 2014, 05:25:43 PM »
Good grief. I don't have children but I have encountered them on occasion :-) and I cannot begin to imagine how cranky a room full of tired, hungry three-year-olds might be. Kids that age (and older) need to eat every couple of hours - missing a meal and being out till 9pm just sounds crazy. If it were an adult party to which children allowed to come along, and the hosts didn't have children I'd not be too surprised as if you haven't experienced children you might have no idea how often they need to eat and sleep. But to have this arrangement at a children's party is odd and probably rude, I think.

Every time I am around young children I am just dumbfounded by the amount of eating and sleeping that goes on! Even when a friend visited me last year with her 9- and 11-year-old, the days were just organised around food! Then another friend came with her 2.5-year-old and we could barely leave the house without having to rush back for naps/food. As someone who eats and sleeps pretty much when I feel like it, sometimes not at all, sometimes loads, I just found it baffling! But now I know - kids need to eat and sleep, it's pretty natural :-)


Organized around food indeed.  My boys are 10 and 6 and they are already eating me out of house and home.  ;D

Take2

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Re: No dinner?
« Reply #71 on: February 13, 2014, 11:41:27 PM »
I would not have taken either of my kids to a kid venue party 6-8pm at age 3, that sounds like a nightmare! And even if they generally eat dinner at 5, they don't generally then do strenuous activity for a long stretch right after, and they are going to get hungry. Not to mention sugaring them up right at bedtime with cake. There is so much wrong with that plan! I am glad everyone survived.


I know what you mean about "the amount of eating and sleeping that goes on." Sometimes I think that babies live about 4 days in one of ours (wake, play, eat, sleep = one day), and toddlers who still take naps live at least 2.

My son actually believed this as a toddler and preschooler. He referred to every waking as "morning" and asked for breakfast after every nap. After waking from his nap, he would refer to the morning as "yesterday," and in the morning, he would refer to after nap as "tomorrow." He would get mad if something was promised "today" and then happened after nap. He was almost 4 when he thoroughly outgrew this quirk, in spite of our best efforts to fix it sooner. Mostly we laughed that he had 2 days to our one...but it also caused quite a bit of confusion.

The Wild One, Forever

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Re: No dinner?
« Reply #72 on: February 14, 2014, 08:01:16 PM »
I would not have taken either of my kids to a kid venue party 6-8pm at age 3, that sounds like a nightmare! And even if they generally eat dinner at 5, they don't generally then do strenuous activity for a long stretch right after, and they are going to get hungry. Not to mention sugaring them up right at bedtime with cake. There is so much wrong with that plan! I am glad everyone survived.


I know what you mean about "the amount of eating and sleeping that goes on." Sometimes I think that babies live about 4 days in one of ours (wake, play, eat, sleep = one day), and toddlers who still take naps live at least 2.

My son actually believed this as a toddler and preschooler. He referred to every waking as "morning" and asked for breakfast after every nap. After waking from his nap, he would refer to the morning as "yesterday," and in the morning, he would refer to after nap as "tomorrow." He would get mad if something was promised "today" and then happened after nap. He was almost 4 when he thoroughly outgrew this quirk, in spite of our best efforts to fix it sooner. Mostly we laughed that he had 2 days to our one...but it also caused quite a bit of confusion.

OK, this is absolutely adorable!    ;D
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bloo

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Re: No dinner?
« Reply #73 on: February 15, 2014, 09:16:44 AM »
I would not have taken either of my kids to a kid venue party 6-8pm at age 3, that sounds like a nightmare! And even if they generally eat dinner at 5, they don't generally then do strenuous activity for a long stretch right after, and they are going to get hungry. Not to mention sugaring them up right at bedtime with cake. There is so much wrong with that plan! I am glad everyone survived.


I know what you mean about "the amount of eating and sleeping that goes on." Sometimes I think that babies live about 4 days in one of ours (wake, play, eat, sleep = one day), and toddlers who still take naps live at least 2.

My son actually believed this as a toddler and preschooler. He referred to every waking as "morning" and asked for breakfast after every nap. After waking from his nap, he would refer to the morning as "yesterday," and in the morning, he would refer to after nap as "tomorrow." He would get mad if something was promised "today" and then happened after nap. He was almost 4 when he thoroughly outgrew this quirk, in spite of our best efforts to fix it sooner. Mostly we laughed that he had 2 days to our one...but it also caused quite a bit of confusion.

OK, this is absolutely adorable!    ;D

That is adorable! ;D

That is also why we would sometimes cringe when our childless friends would let our young kids know of some treat coming up in a day or so. Since very young kids don't have the concept of 'time' nailed down very well, we could very well hear the plaintive bleating for 'treat!' for days!  ::)