Author Topic: Eating a present you gave someone  (Read 10720 times)

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Outdoor Girl

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Re: Eating a present you gave someone
« Reply #60 on: February 18, 2014, 07:16:26 PM »
I wouldn't have a big conversation with Grandma over it but I would immediately take out some of the cookies into a separate container and tell everyone that these were just for DD.  And if Grandma then questioned it, I'd explain.  'Last time you were here, DD only ate a couple of cookies and when she went to get one shortly after you left, they were all gone!  She was a bit upset so I figured if she got her own little container, she could ration them however she wanted to.'
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Bluenomi

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Re: Eating a present you gave someone
« Reply #61 on: February 18, 2014, 07:47:08 PM »
OP here, I've been trying to catch up on everyone's posts! I'll try answer the questions I can remember.

MIL always has shortbread at home. She has it every day with her tea. I have other biscuits in the house she can have while she's here but she always goes for hers, maybe out of habit. She might not have realise she ate the last ones, the container was still in the cupboard with the baking paper that had been wrapped around the shortbread in there. It's possible she thought there was one or two more left in there. But yes between her and FIL they eat over half the shortbread before they leave. She doesn't bring a full batch since she puts it in her carry on in the plane, it's around 20 pieces. They are only ever here for 2 days.

DD doesn't mind sharing her treat but MIL just helps herself, usually when neither DH or I are in the room. I came out at one stage on the weekend after changing the twins and both MIL and FIL are tucking into 2 each with their cups of tea. DD hadn't had any by that stage which would have been obvious since the package hadn't been opened.

I think next time some will go straight into a container for DD and her only. The rest I'll leave with the tea and let MIL help herself to those and not tell her where DD's are hidden. Luckily they keep for ages so if DD has her own stash they should last a while.

StarFaerie

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Re: Eating a present you gave someone
« Reply #62 on: February 18, 2014, 08:43:07 PM »
This could be a difference in meaning of words causing a misunderstanding.

Like when my mother says she made tomato soup for me, what she means is that she made a big batch of soup and it's the tomato one because I love her tomato soup so she made that one instead of her favourite of pea soup. But I don't get the whole batch, I get a small portion of the batch. It's for everyone, but specifically made because it's my favourite and hence "for me".

If that's the case, maybe a discussion with your DD about the different word meanings would help.

Hopefull

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Re: Eating a present you gave someone
« Reply #63 on: February 18, 2014, 09:56:35 PM »
I Think hiding a few for your daughter is a good plan for next time. But I do have a bone to pick with you. All this talk about shortbread and no recipe? Could you possibly give us the recipe? I love shortbread! Please :)
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CuriousParty

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Re: Eating a present you gave someone
« Reply #64 on: February 18, 2014, 11:13:01 PM »
Ah, I had a thought, given your update.

What is the likelihood that, really, MIL likes her own shortbread, and only her own shortbread, for her daily "treat," but feels it would be rude to say to you "I would prefer to have my own cookies while we are visiting so I'll bring them along." ?  The "I made them for DD!" would be a perfect cover - except for the fact that DD is now noticing.

If you think this might be the case, then I'd try the route of "You and DD make them here together", as that would address each part of the problem.  There would be a full batch,  sod DD would have more cookies, and MIL would have her daily snack.

Dindrane

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Re: Eating a present you gave someone
« Reply #65 on: February 18, 2014, 11:30:07 PM »
Even though their visits tend to be short, I would definitely suggest that your MIL make the shortbread with your daughter (and you, if you're around) if there's time for that. It would be a good chance to spend some time together, and if you're able to participate, you might be able to improve your own shortbread-baking skills.

And unless they wouldn't keep long enough or you'd have nowhere to store them, you could even make a double batch and just store the bulk of it for much later. Then you wouldn't even have to make shortbread every time your in-laws visit, but there'd still be enough that everyone gets to enjoy it.


Yvaine

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Re: Eating a present you gave someone
« Reply #66 on: February 19, 2014, 06:34:25 AM »
Ah, I had a thought, given your update.

What is the likelihood that, really, MIL likes her own shortbread, and only her own shortbread, for her daily "treat," but feels it would be rude to say to you "I would prefer to have my own cookies while we are visiting so I'll bring them along." ?  The "I made them for DD!" would be a perfect cover - except for the fact that DD is now noticing.

If you think this might be the case, then I'd try the route of "You and DD make them here together", as that would address each part of the problem.  There would be a full batch,  sod DD would have more cookies, and MIL would have her daily snack.

Ding ding ding! I think we have a winner.

bopper

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Re: Eating a present you gave someone
« Reply #67 on: February 19, 2014, 01:18:48 PM »
I would say "Can you put a piece or two aside for DD? She really likes them."

TootsNYC

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Re: Eating a present you gave someone
« Reply #68 on: February 19, 2014, 01:30:05 PM »
I would say "Can you put a piece or two aside for DD? She really likes them."

I wouldn't ask. I'd either announce somewhat casually, or I'd simply do it.

LadyJaneinMD

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Re: Eating a present you gave someone
« Reply #69 on: February 19, 2014, 02:05:16 PM »
Now I REALLY want some shortbread.  :-[

I was just thinking that!  I have a great recipe at home, too.
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Mrs. Tilney

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Re: Eating a present you gave someone
« Reply #70 on: February 19, 2014, 04:02:48 PM »
This could be a difference in meaning of words causing a misunderstanding.

Like when my mother says she made tomato soup for me, what she means is that she made a big batch of soup and it's the tomato one because I love her tomato soup so she made that one instead of her favourite of pea soup. But I don't get the whole batch, I get a small portion of the batch. It's for everyone, but specifically made because it's my favourite and hence "for me".

If that's the case, maybe a discussion with your DD about the different word meanings would help.

This is how I interpreted it myself. When I visit my parents, my mom will make foods "for me"...and I'm frequently not the one who has the most. Or, I sometimes make cookies for the office, and I keep in mind that one of my coworkers REALLY likes a certain type, so I make that "for her." And I eat a bunch of them myself. (And have, in fact, finished off the plate, if I go into the kitchen late afternoon and find a lone cookie sitting there!)

Alli8098

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Re: Eating a present you gave someone
« Reply #71 on: February 19, 2014, 04:09:06 PM »
This could be a difference in meaning of words causing a misunderstanding.

Like when my mother says she made tomato soup for me, what she means is that she made a big batch of soup and it's the tomato one because I love her tomato soup so she made that one instead of her favourite of pea soup. But I don't get the whole batch, I get a small portion of the batch. It's for everyone, but specifically made because it's my favourite and hence "for me".

If that's the case, maybe a discussion with your DD about the different word meanings would help.

This is how I interpreted it myself. When I visit my parents, my mom will make foods "for me"...and I'm frequently not the one who has the most. Or, I sometimes make cookies for the office, and I keep in mind that one of my coworkers REALLY likes a certain type, so I make that "for her." And I eat a bunch of them myself. (And have, in fact, finished off the plate, if I go into the kitchen late afternoon and find a lone cookie sitting there!)

I only make certain kind of cookies for the holidays and don't make them any other time of the year.  At one job I had our team lead loved one particular kind I made.  So the next year I put together the usual containers of cookies to put out for the team; then I packed her her own individual tin of her favorite cookies.  I figured that way she didn't have to try to rush to get one of her favorites before they were gone.  She had her own that she could enjoy and/or share at her leisure.

onikenbai

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Re: Eating a present you gave someone
« Reply #72 on: February 20, 2014, 02:45:26 AM »
I'm wondering if the reason that Grandma's shortbread tastes different is that there is a regional difference in ingredients - perhaps Grandma could be persuaded to make an extra batch during the visit as hers is just "perfect" and DD would love it even more if she got to watch Grandma make it.

That could be part of it but honestly, my mother and I use the exact same recipe and our results are like night and day.  Hers are soft and flakey; you could build houses with mine.  We use the exact same ingredients and neither of us uses any kitchen appliances, both being wooden spoon people.  We're not entirely sure what we do that makes it so dramatically different, but half the family prefers mine and half prefers hers.  I figure it's a matter of dough handling.

VorFemme

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Re: Eating a present you gave someone
« Reply #73 on: February 20, 2014, 08:58:32 AM »
Or one of you has cold hands (or a marble counter that stays cold) and the other has warm hands so that the fat melts a bit as it is being handled.

I learned from reading a book on Science in the Kitchen, that pie crust has to be worked with COLD fat to get a light & flaky crust.  The colder the fat (but not frozen) the better, to a degree.  Same with Southern (USA) style biscuits - made with soft flour.  The more you work the dough, the more the fat melts and the further from the desired degree of light & flaky the baked goods will end up.

Bread dough with yeast NEEDS to be worked with to get the most gluten to form for a lighter product.
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LadyL

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Re: Eating a present you gave someone
« Reply #74 on: February 20, 2014, 09:25:18 AM »
Or one of you has cold hands (or a marble counter that stays cold) and the other has warm hands so that the fat melts a bit as it is being handled.

I learned from reading a book on Science in the Kitchen, that pie crust has to be worked with COLD fat to get a light & flaky crust.  The colder the fat (but not frozen) the better, to a degree.  Same with Southern (USA) style biscuits - made with soft flour.  The more you work the dough, the more the fat melts and the further from the desired degree of light & flaky the baked goods will end up.

Bread dough with yeast NEEDS to be worked with to get the most gluten to form for a lighter product.

Yep I add extra shortening and put my pie crust in the fridge for as long as I can before baking and it is super flaky and light.