Author Topic: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)  (Read 68237 times)

0 Members and 2 Guests are viewing this topic.

whatsanenigma

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1998
Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #345 on: March 28, 2014, 03:34:41 PM »

I am sooooo sorry this happened to you. My daughter wants to be a costumer. She has already made a lot of nifty stuff. If she and the group she went with had suggested something like this I would have done my standard "my daughter is being unusual mode" - nod, smile and say "alright honey - do you need help with anything?"

I have helped - with making a set of articulated dragon wings. :-)

I hope you mother is a little more supportive now. To late for the prom, but still.

I think she accepts my costuming a little more now, which is better than outright attacks and dismissal. Unfortunately I'll never get to do anything like what I wanted for prom, as there's precious little tolerance for that kind of self expression at "adult" formal events.

I work at a university.  Once a year (I'm not sure of the time frame) they have a "second chance prom", which got started as a way to allow GLBT people of any age who missed their own proms due to not being able to go with the person of their choice a "second chance", but it's open to anyone who missed out on prom or just wants to redo it or whatever.  I've never been, but I get so tempted.  I might very well do it next time.

Maybe there is something like that near you.

Firecat

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2566
Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #346 on: March 28, 2014, 04:20:55 PM »

I am sooooo sorry this happened to you. My daughter wants to be a costumer. She has already made a lot of nifty stuff. If she and the group she went with had suggested something like this I would have done my standard "my daughter is being unusual mode" - nod, smile and say "alright honey - do you need help with anything?"

I have helped - with making a set of articulated dragon wings. :-)

I hope you mother is a little more supportive now. To late for the prom, but still.

I think she accepts my costuming a little more now, which is better than outright attacks and dismissal. Unfortunately I'll never get to do anything like what I wanted for prom, as there's precious little tolerance for that kind of self expression at "adult" formal events.

I work at a university.  Once a year (I'm not sure of the time frame) they have a "second chance prom", which got started as a way to allow GLBT people of any age who missed their own proms due to not being able to go with the person of their choice a "second chance", but it's open to anyone who missed out on prom or just wants to redo it or whatever.  I've never been, but I get so tempted.  I might very well do it next time.

Maybe there is something like that near you.

You could also check for a geek prom or a goth prom near you. Both have been held in my area. One of the local science fiction conventions also does a masquerade ball.

Amanita

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1450
  • San Francisco I miss you!
Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #347 on: March 28, 2014, 05:02:44 PM »
Sounds like fun:)

Elfmama

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 6188
Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #348 on: March 28, 2014, 05:31:41 PM »
I am very wary of sending DH to the store for me, detailed list or not.  Because he WILL buy something else than what I said I wanted.

One time was when we were living with the ILs for a short time.  It is important to remember for this story that MIL used no spices, herbs, or other flavoring in her food, not even salt, pepper, garlic, or onions, so I couldn't use the things that were already on-hand. ("Only stinky foreigners eat onion and garlic!"  ::) ) They were going out for the evening, so I decided to make pizza, a food that never appeared on her table.

I sent DH for this:

Flour
Salt
Packet of dry yeast
1 onion
1 bulb garlic
can of tomato paste with Italian seasonings
8 oz pkg of sliced ham, or smaller if they had one.
8 oz Mozzarella cheese, any brand but Kraft

We were living on a VERY tight budget, and this was intended to minimize the expense. 

I did get the flour and salt, but everything else he decided to get what he thought I ought to want.  I got:

A cake of yeast, kind of a damp cube.  A form that I'd never used before and haven't seen since, probably because it didn't rise properly.
No onion
No garlic
Tomato paste with garlic and onion
Bottle of Italian herbs
1 pound of sliced deli honey-baked ham
1 pound Kraft mozzarella

He had excuses for all of it.  "I got that kind of tomato paste so I didn't have to get garlic and onions.  And deli ham tastes better than packaged.  And that was the only kind of yeast and mozzarella I could find.  What do you mean, an onion is cheaper than Italian seasoning?"  He'd spent at least twice what I'd budgeted, even more than the price of a delivery pizza.

And MIL had the utter gall to say "Why are you making such a fuss over a lousy pizza?"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
It's true. Money can't buy happiness.  You have to turn it
into books first.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Piratelvr1121

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 11108
Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #349 on: March 28, 2014, 09:21:13 PM »
I remembered something.  Okay I will start off by saying I think I've wanted to be a redhead ever since I saw "Annie" and as many of my movie/book idols growing up were redheads (Pippi, Anne Shirley, Ariel, etc) I was sure that red hair was prettier than any other color.  Or actually it was this odd notion that if I had red hair I'd be more like these characters. My natural color was a dark brown with reddish highlights. 

Well I wasn't allowed to color my hair while living at home, even after an aunt pointed out when I was 17 that I was already getting gray hairs.

So sometime in my freshman year, I bought a kit and I can't remember if I'd asked this girl to help me or she'd volunteered but either way, she wasn't allowed near my head again with a coloring bottle again.  I ended up with patches of the new color amongst my natural color and it looked AWFUL!  I mean I had figured that since she could see my whole head better than I could, and she'd colored her hair before with good results, she'd know what she was doing.

Though...in looking back I sometimes wonder if she did it on purpose and seemed to see me as competition, despite the fact that when he was free before he and I had hooked up, she had no interest in him at all.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

Harriet Jones

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 6716
  • Yes, we know who you are.
Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #350 on: March 29, 2014, 07:40:57 AM »
Anglicans sometimes eat a whole meal with their salad fork....

(Yeah, that one was told to me by an Anglican priest.)

Now this one, I do not get -- even though I'm English, though not brought up Anglican as such. (I'm not bugging folk for an explanation -- as is often observed, jokes cease to be very funny when explained, if they have to be !)

Anglicans don't have many non-Biblical prohibitions, but it's sometimes thought of as an "upper crust" religious sect. So, where one religion might ban alcohol or gambling, Anglicans would be horrified at someone eating a meal with the wrong fork. Sort of a play on making formal etiquette a religious requirement.

As an addition to that, it's okay in the UK to eat a main course with only your fork so long as it is only your fork. You cannot switch between knife-and-fork and just fork. Then pudding is ALWAYS eaten with a fork. Lots of people will say that they use spoons (and very sensible that is too) but if one was U it was a fork or go without.

I'm not sure I understand this -- does this mean you have to hold the knife through the whole course even if you happen to be done with the part of the course that needs the knife?

Bethalize

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4770
    • Toxic People Survival Checklist
Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #351 on: March 29, 2014, 07:51:29 AM »
I'm not sure I understand this -- does this mean you have to hold the knife through the whole course even if you happen to be done with the part of the course that needs the knife?

No, once you put your knife down (and switch your fork to your right hand) it stays down. If you are sitting down and can use your knife you must keep it in your right hand and your fork in your left.

Harriet Jones

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 6716
  • Yes, we know who you are.
Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #352 on: March 29, 2014, 08:01:37 AM »
And never pick it up again?  ;)   It seems weird that if you missed cutting off a piece of gristle, you'd be considered gauche if you had to pick your knife up again.

PastryGoddess

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4835
    • My Image Portfolio and Store
Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #353 on: March 29, 2014, 08:45:26 AM »
And never pick it up again?  ;)   It seems weird that if you missed cutting off a piece of gristle, you'd be considered gauche if you had to pick your knife up again.

Indeed.  I'll take being gauche over eating gristle any day of the week

perpetua

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2156
Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #354 on: March 29, 2014, 11:28:03 AM »
And never pick it up again?  ;)   It seems weird that if you missed cutting off a piece of gristle, you'd be considered gauche if you had to pick your knife up again.

Indeed.  I'll take being gauche over eating gristle any day of the week

Don't forget though, we don't do the putting-our-knife-down-and-swapping-hands thing. So - and having to think about how I eat is really weird when I'm not actually eating - I don't think my knife would be put down anyway, it would be in my hand all the time I was eating.

SoCalVal

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2505
Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #355 on: March 29, 2014, 01:57:52 PM »
And never pick it up again?  ;)   It seems weird that if you missed cutting off a piece of gristle, you'd be considered gauche if you had to pick your knife up again.

Indeed.  I'll take being gauche over eating gristle any day of the week

Don't forget though, we don't do the putting-our-knife-down-and-swapping-hands thing. So - and having to think about how I eat is really weird when I'm not actually eating - I don't think my knife would be put down anyway, it would be in my hand all the time I was eating.

I've never done the swapping hands thing either, except once.  I'm a lefty (but dual-handed) so my knife is in my left.  However, I probably would still do it that way if I were right-handed.  In my ethnic heritage, we eat with the fork in our left and the spoon in our right (the spoon is the vessel to bring food to the mouth).  Knives are, oddly, nowhere to be found.  Frankly, I don't care if having the knife in my left is considered gauche.  After I tried swapping hands the one time, I found it incredibly annoying and realized I really don't care if someone has a problem with me eating knife in left and fork in right (and no one has anyway but, if someone did, that's their blood vessel to burst -- it's not my problem if they have a problem with what I find to be an odd rule).  I, as a rule, eat with a salad fork or a teaspoon anyway (I find standard fork tines and spoons to big for my comfort for my mouth).

I'd add a stop-helping-me story to get us back on topic, but I can't think of one.



Bethalize

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4770
    • Toxic People Survival Checklist
Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #356 on: March 29, 2014, 05:54:19 PM »
And never pick it up again?  ;)   It seems weird that if you missed cutting off a piece of gristle, you'd be considered gauche if you had to pick your knife up again.

Don't forget that at a plated dinner you wouldn't put your knife down. You'd only put it down for things like buffet suppers (or "fork" suppers).

Katana_Geldar

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1861
Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #357 on: March 29, 2014, 06:00:52 PM »
I find I actually can do the hand swapping, which I'm told is actually American. It's an acceptable way of eating so I'm not fussed.

JustEstelle

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 980
Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #358 on: March 29, 2014, 06:29:35 PM »
Could we move the table etiquette posts to their own thread, please?

Shalamar

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1230
Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #359 on: March 29, 2014, 06:40:37 PM »
I'm a little odd in that I like cheese when it's started to get a bit dried out and hard, especially Swiss cheese.   My husband knows this, and yet ...

Me:   Where's that piece of Swiss cheese that was in the fridge?
Husband:   *virtuously*.  It was getting dried out, so I ate it.
Me:   But I LIKE dried out cheese!
Husband:   Oh.   Right.