Author Topic: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)  (Read 64675 times)

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MommyPenguin

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Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #480 on: April 16, 2014, 10:07:26 AM »
And I thought the time my DH used Pledge on the hardwood floors was bad!!!  ;D  Granted, they looked showroom new, but holy cow they were slippery!!!

I didn't know my husband had another brother!  What is it with these guys?
In Dave Barry's Complete Guide to Guys, he has a bit about guys cleaning. One of them is that, when asked to clean, they will "grab a spray bottle - any spray bottle - and a roll of paper towels..." I hope I've quoted it correctly.

(It's the funniest book I've ever read; DH and I quote from it all the time. The spray bottle is a frequent one. Others are "Did Elaine ever have a horse?" and "I can't believe the Jets called a draw play on 3rd and 17!") Muah ha ha! Now you have to read it!  >:D

I once read something that talked about a mom not getting much done during the day, so she filled little bowls with Pine Sol and hid them behind picture frames on top of high pieces of furniture, so that the house *smelled* like she'd gotten cleaning done that day.  (This may have been in the Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy?)  I remember reading that and thinking... but what if the little bowls accidentally got spilled?  Wouldn't the house being a mess be more significant than the smell of Pine Sol?  Or, if the house was clean, would the smell of Pine Sol make that much difference between "clean" and "not clean?"

mrs_deb

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Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #481 on: April 16, 2014, 10:15:39 AM »
In Dave Barry's Complete Guide to Guys, he has a bit about guys cleaning. One of them is that, when asked to clean, they will "grab a spray bottle - any spray bottle - and a roll of paper towels..." I hope I've quoted it correctly.


You laugh.  I owned a cleaning company for a few years...hired 99% women, but I did have a man once - during training, I went into a bathroom he was cleaning and saw him spraying disinfectant on the mirror.  Clear spray bottles clearly labeled, and glass cleaner = blue, disinfectant = green.  AND the disinfectant was mint-scented.  So kind of hard to mix up.

"Steve, that's not glass cleaner!  It's disinfectant!" I said.  His reply: "Ehhh...they're all the same."

Yeah...he didn't last long.

123sandy

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Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #482 on: April 16, 2014, 10:36:53 AM »


I once read something that talked about a mom not getting much done during the day, so she filled little bowls with Pine Sol and hid them behind picture frames on top of high pieces of furniture, so that the house *smelled* like she'd gotten cleaning done that day.  (This may have been in the Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy?)  I remember reading that and thinking... but what if the little bowls accidentally got spilled?  Wouldn't the house being a mess be more significant than the smell of Pine Sol?  Or, if the house was clean, would the smell of Pine Sol make that much difference between "clean" and "not clean?"
[/quote]


Pine sol in the drains makes it smell like you've worked hard all day...

nutraxfornerves

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Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #483 on: April 16, 2014, 10:47:31 AM »
When Mr. Nutrax and I were planning our wedding, we agreed on very formal invitations. He found a do-it-yourself invitation kit, complete with templates and stationary, that worked very well. While I was working on the invitations, he decided to helpfully take care of postage without consulting me. He was a stamp collector, so figured that he knew what he was doing.

First, it never occurred to him that wedding invitations might be heavier than one ounce, the amount allowed by a single first-class stamp. And  he didn't really think through what a formal invitation should look like. So he bought 100 of these stamps:


He was rather surprised when I said that, no, I was not going to mail out formal wedding invitations with Star Wars stamps, and look what happens when I put an invitation on your postal scale. I took an invitation to the post office to get the correct weight and buy stamps. When I joked with the clerk about the Star Wars stamps, he invited the people standing in line to comment. Opinion was pretty much evenly split on "cool" or "no way." A good time was had by all. Drab 58Ę stamps turned out to be just right.

However, I compromised. We included response envelopes. They all got Star Wars stamps.



Nutrax
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Carotte

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Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #484 on: April 16, 2014, 11:19:28 AM »
My SO's sister got lucky, she sent her wedding invitations around february (or at least bought the stamps then) so they were heart shaped St Valentine ones.

Shalamar

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Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #485 on: April 16, 2014, 11:22:56 AM »
Speaking of stamps, I have a "stop helping me" story.  This happened to my mother back when she was still working:

Mum:  *the last day before her week of vacation*  Boy, I'm swamped.
Colleague:  I'll help!
Mum:  Really?  That would be great!  This big pile of out-going correspondence has been stamped, but now it needs to be mailed.
Colleague:  Okay, I'll do it next week.
Mum:  Um, no, it really needs to be done either today or tomorrow, because postage is going up by 5 cents after that.  If you wait too long, we'll have to add additional stamps.
Colleague:  Fine - I'll do it tomorrow.

Annnnnd she forgot.  Mum came back to find the big pile of correspondence exactly where she'd left it, and she had to add another 5 cent stamp to each envelope. 

z_squared82

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Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #486 on: April 16, 2014, 01:22:52 PM »
So kind of a spin on ďhelpingĒÖ

BG: My father is a mechanic. This was his primary job for most of my life, but the economy and his industry took a down turn, so now itís part-time. I was helping out at his shop on a day he worked his primary job.  End BG.

A customer comes in to drop off a tiller for my dad to fix. Itís in the trunk of his car. I said, All right, Iíll help you get it out. Iím standing next to him, taking cues. I had my hand between the engine and the wall of the trunk when the customer moves the tiller and COMPLETELY SMASHED MY HAND between the engine and the wall. And then he scolds me for having my hand there! Dude, I said I was going to help, you saw me there, donít act surprised! Didnít apologize at all, basically implied that a woman shouldnít have anything to do with anything mechanical. I had the have the next customer right up his own service ticket and then drove myself to the hospital, thatís how out of commission my hand was. (My hand was not, thankfully, broken, but I did have a bruise the size of an egg for a week and a half.)

LadyClaire

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Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #487 on: April 17, 2014, 09:11:21 AM »
My husband has an obsession with cars having to be absolutely clean inside. Nothing should be in the car except things like window scrapers, the owner's manual, etc.

This results in him deciding to be "helpful" and taking things out of my car if he happens to notice something in there. Which often results in him doing things like removing packages I put in there to take to the post office the next day, or a bag of clothes I was going to return to the store, or a box of things I was going to give to a co-worker. I have told him repeatedly to stop taking things out of my car, but he still does it.

My car has been at the dealership for a month since it was one of the cars affected by the GM ignition switch recall, and since the car was having ignition problems GM gave me a rental until my car was fixed. They called this morning to tell me that my car is done. I just went out to grab the paperwork for the rental so that I can check how much gas it had in it when they gave it to me (they only asked the gas level match what it was when I took the car). The paperwork is gone. I called my husband..Oh, yes. He took the paper out of the car and put it on the kitchen table. I don't even get his logic with that one. Rental car paperwork should be IN the rental car. He could have put it in the glove box or the console but no..he took it out of the car and inside the house.

I am now going to have to just lock my car and keep the keys in my purse to stop him from his obsessive removal of things from my car.

alkira6

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Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #488 on: April 17, 2014, 09:38:18 AM »
My husband has an obsession with cars having to be absolutely clean inside. Nothing should be in the car except things like window scrapers, the owner's manual, etc.

This results in him deciding to be "helpful" and taking things out of my car if he happens to notice something in there. Which often results in him doing things like removing packages I put in there to take to the post office the next day, or a bag of clothes I was going to return to the store, or a box of things I was going to give to a co-worker. I have told him repeatedly to stop taking things out of my car, but he still does it.

My car has been at the dealership for a month since it was one of the cars affected by the GM ignition switch recall, and since the car was having ignition problems GM gave me a rental until my car was fixed. They called this morning to tell me that my car is done. I just went out to grab the paperwork for the rental so that I can check how much gas it had in it when they gave it to me (they only asked the gas level match what it was when I took the car). The paperwork is gone. I called my husband..Oh, yes. He took the paper out of the car and put it on the kitchen table. I don't even get his logic with that one. Rental car paperwork should be IN the rental car. He could have put it in the glove box or the console but no..he took it out of the car and inside the house.

I am now going to have to just lock my car and keep the keys in my purse to stop him from his obsessive removal of things from my car.

wow, that is odd.  I can't get my husband to clean out the trash in his car, let alone mine.  Maybe he can have a side job as a care detailer  >:D

shadowfox79

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Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #489 on: April 17, 2014, 09:43:21 AM »
This one came up at work yesterday - it wasn't in my building, but our Health and Safety Officer sent an email round about it.

One of our buildings is quite tall and, as a result, has disability rescue points on the stairs, since during a fire alarm the lifts automatically switch off. Yesterday there was a fire drill, and one woman in a wheelchair went and parked in the rescue point. However, some genius co-worker found her there, grabbed the handles, and pushed the chair at a run all the way down the corridor to the lifts - which, of course, weren't operating. So now we have two panicking colleagues in the wrong part of the building to be rescued.

The stories in this thread about people with disabilities are frankly unnerving. I don't know which is worse - people who are over-zealous or people who want to help but not make much effort. I will never forget a TV documentary with celebrities wearing blackout glasses to see if they could manage being blind. One girl offered to help one of them and walked her straight smack into a post.

siamesecat2965

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Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #490 on: April 17, 2014, 01:10:02 PM »
When my daughter was 3 she 'helped' me clean the toilet. With my toothbrush. And when I asked she told me proudly she had been 'helping' me for a long time. She told me her previous brush was pink. I had changed toothbrushes 3 weeks before.

Hehehe. A friend posted recently that heard "licking" noises coming from the bathroom. Went to investigate,and found his CAT licking his toothbrush. Someone kindly pointed out it may not have been the first time  >:D

siamesecat2965

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Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #491 on: April 17, 2014, 01:24:05 PM »
On the subject of "hand me downs" I will say all of the furniture in my apt, aside form my bed, is from my parents, who got a lot from grandma and my one great aunt. But, it was all mutually decided upon when I moved out. Mom said what do you need, i said, well, this and that, and so on, and we went around and she offered what she was willing to give up, and I took it.

She was thrilled when I moved as she had a gorgeous vanity that had been my grandmother's - but I had no room for. I told her i wasn't sure if it would fit in my new apt, but when i got there, and had my other furniture, it did.  I chose one, she sold the other, but the funny part is, wasn't until I had that, plus dresser and armoire, did I realisze i had chosen the vanity that matched the other two. They had been my grandparent's when they got married in the 1920's.

And now, she always asks me first, as I do her. if we want it, great, if not, we can dispose of it as we choose.

I have a cousin though, who is always trying to pawn her clothes off onto me and her SIL. she's lost weight, and her original size fits her SIL, and her in-between fits me. The problem is, SIL and I have different taste in clothes than cousin, and cousin also tends to wear things she likes, rather than what is actually flatering on her. and as we have the same body type, i very rarely take anything.

I live out of state, but her SIL is local, so she has a very bad habit of dumping bringing bags of clothing to SIL, and just leaving them, and when SIL doens't want any of it, she's now stuck with getting rid of it! And cousin gets irked sometimes when we DON'T take any of her stuff. Sorry, but i am a tad fluffy, and tapered, low rise ankle jeans in colored denim only make my posterior look like a giant piece of fruit.

I cleaned out my closet recently, but I emailed SIL and said i have this and that, are you interested? she said thanks, but no, so off to Goodwill it went.

Slartibartfast

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Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #492 on: April 17, 2014, 02:28:13 PM »
FIL runs a charity in which he collects books and brings them over to start libraries in several schools in Uganda.  (He's also building a high school, which is really cool, but the head of the school district loved the idea of a library and asked if he could help put one in each of the other 147 schools in the district as well.)  Not surprisingly, out of all the used books FIL ends up collecting, only about half are suitable to send - the other half are out-of-date college textbooks, half-used coloring books, moldy/mildewy/falling apart, too "adult" for a young audience, etc.

The problem is, he then goes through all these extra books and picks out the ones he thinks DH and I would like.  Which ends up being boxes and boxes of moldy physics textbooks (for DH) and 30-year-old Harlequin romances (for me) and sticker books with the gum all worn off the stickers (for Babybartfast).  I have no problem saying "no thanks," so the Harlequins have mostly stopped, but DH always accepts the textbooks because he does actually read that kind of stuff for fun.  Except we've now got a bookcase FULL of science and computer textbooks, many of which are falling apart / out of date / smelly / dirty, and DH won't let me throw them out  :-\

siamesecat2965

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Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #493 on: April 17, 2014, 03:09:46 PM »
My husband has an obsession with cars having to be absolutely clean inside. Nothing should be in the car except things like window scrapers, the owner's manual, etc.

This results in him deciding to be "helpful" and taking things out of my car if he happens to notice something in there. Which often results in him doing things like removing packages I put in there to take to the post office the next day, or a bag of clothes I was going to return to the store, or a box of things I was going to give to a co-worker. I have told him repeatedly to stop taking things out of my car, but he still does it.

 
I am now going to have to just lock my car and keep the keys in my purse to stop him from his obsessive removal of things from my car.

This would drive me nuts. Evilsiamsecat would be tempted to rig up my car with some sort of loud alarm and flashing lights, and water gun, that would go off ONLY when he went near the car, to ward him off. I keep a lot of stuff in my car too, and woe to anyone who'd remove it so it wasn't there when I needed it!

jedikaiti

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Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #494 on: April 17, 2014, 03:31:54 PM »
I think if I found I needed something from my car and my DH had removed it like that, I'd make HIM do the running around to get it and bring it to me!
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