• May 25, 2015, 09:39:46 PM

### Author Topic: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)  (Read 80367 times)

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#### Puppies&Kittens

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##### Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #135 on: March 10, 2014, 01:42:40 PM »
Quote
I hope you don't feel badly about that.  How were you supposed to know?  Youre not a mind-reader.  If I saw a pie, and nobody told me otherwise, I'd presume it was a dessert item.

Really?  That's I interesting to me.  Are you American?  Do you have a much bigger tradition of sweet pies than savoury?  I'm British, and I'd find a savoury pie as likely as sweet.

Not the OP, but in my experiences pies brought to share at a potluck are dessert items.  I've made and had savory pies before but I usually don't bring them to potlucks

Or if you are bringing it to a potluck, for heaven's sake, *label* it.   Or bring a card stating the contents.

#### mime

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##### Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #136 on: March 10, 2014, 02:11:26 PM »
Former short-term girlfriend who demanded wanted to help me renovate my house.

I collect stamps.   A former girlfriend licked all of my mint stamps and stuck them to album pages because she was helping me while I was at work.

I just read this one to my stamp collecting DH. "Where is she buried?", he would like to know.

I'm not a stamp collector, and don't know any, but my *gasp* upon reading that was audible enough for my coworkers to wonder what was wrong!

#### learningtofly

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##### Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #137 on: March 10, 2014, 02:30:37 PM »
I used to date a guy who was a Grill Master.  He used a dry rub, lots of smoke, and took his time.  These ribs were heavenly.  So at a big family summer party, his BIL decided to help him.  BIL took several (refrigerated) bottles of BBQ sauce, dumped them over everything, and set it on the table.  Now BF had been planning to heat up the sauce, and serve it on the side for those who wanted it.

But now we had icy cold ribs slathered with the sauce.  I was so angry. BF's way, people had a choice.  BIL's way, it was his way or no way.

Oh my jaw just dropped.  DH does ribs like that and they are heavenly.  I think anyone who dumped cold sauce on them would be chased off the property with a grill brush.

#### Slartibartfast

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##### Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #138 on: March 10, 2014, 02:33:57 PM »
Quote
I hope you don't feel badly about that.  How were you supposed to know?  Youre not a mind-reader.  If I saw a pie, and nobody told me otherwise, I'd presume it was a dessert item.

Really?  That's I interesting to me.  Are you American?  Do you have a much bigger tradition of sweet pies than savoury?  I'm British, and I'd find a savoury pie as likely as sweet.

We really just don't "do" savory pies in the US.  Most people would know what chicken pot pie and maybe shepherds pie are, but those are very definite exceptions - and (apart from chicken pot pie) pretty much any savory pie you might find here would be considered a British (i.e. "ethnic") dish.  We definitely don't do the combination of meat + sweet that y'all have over there - an English friend brought some mince pies to a Christmas party and nearly everyone thought they were really odd.  (I loved them, but then I do love sweet dishes in just about every variety . . .)

#### Piratelvr1121

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##### Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #139 on: March 10, 2014, 02:35:01 PM »
Quote
Doesn't any woman or child that goes in to the ER with bruises/broken bones not directly attributable to something like a car accident get asked that question.

Couple years ago I fell and hurt my shoulder and wrist…….no broken bones but got very sore so I went to ER next morning.  At intake, I was asked if there was domestic violence in the home.  I understand it’s something they’re trained to ask and they’re just trying to help.

In my experience of taking kids to ER they will ask several times what happened because they want to be sure they get the same question each time.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

#### Sara Crewe

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##### Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #140 on: March 10, 2014, 02:41:43 PM »
Quote
I hope you don't feel badly about that.  How were you supposed to know?  Youre not a mind-reader.  If I saw a pie, and nobody told me otherwise, I'd presume it was a dessert item.

Really?  That's I interesting to me.  Are you American?  Do you have a much bigger tradition of sweet pies than savoury?  I'm British, and I'd find a savoury pie as likely as sweet.

We really just don't "do" savory pies in the US.  Most people would know what chicken pot pie and maybe shepherds pie are, but those are very definite exceptions - and (apart from chicken pot pie) pretty much any savory pie you might find here would be considered a British (i.e. "ethnic") dish.  We definitely don't do the combination of meat + sweet that y'all have over there - an English friend brought some mince pies to a Christmas party and nearly everyone thought they were really odd.  (I loved them, but then I do love sweet dishes in just about every variety . . .)

But mince pies don't contain meat ( which isn't to say they are necessarily vegetarian lard and suet may be in the recipe)

#### jedikaiti

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##### Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #141 on: March 10, 2014, 02:44:47 PM »
Quote
the hostess who took the honey-glazed spiral ham brought by her brother or brother in law, trimmed it down and served it as slices of ham because no one needed the fat or the sugar!
I read this to DH. His jaw dropped and he turned red with rage! (He blushes easily, and is a teddy bear.) We loves us some Honey Baked Ham.

Back on topic: In this case, the help offered was very good, and could have been badly needed by someone else.

I'm pretty sure I've told this before. I had fallen off a horse, and was badly bruised all up one side. About a week later, when all the bruises were beautifully colored, I sneezed. That's how I found out I had broken a couple of ribs in the same fall. Of course, it was the middle of the night, and DH was asleep, and I had to wake him up to take me to the ED.

He gets mad when I am hurt - mad because I am hurt, not mad at me. When he is really mad, he looks dangerous, as if he might explode violently any second. It can be really scary to anyone who doesn't know him. So, during intake, he is sitting back, angry, while I am talking to the very nice male nurse. He noticed the old bruises and my explosive-looking DH, and leaned in to quietly ask me, "Do you need a safe place to stay tonight?" Deity bless him! It made me laugh, which hurt. But I thanked him warmly all the same.
<Snip>
Doesn't any woman or child that goes in to the ER with bruises/broken bones not directly attributable to something like a car accident get asked that question.

I went to the ER with a leg cramp (it really was that bad) and got asked "Are you safe in your home" before they would let DH see me.
What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

"The problem with re-examining your brilliant ideas is that more often than not, you discover they are the intellectual equivalent of saying, 'Hold my beer and watch this!'" - Cindy Couture

#### Editeer

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##### Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #142 on: March 10, 2014, 02:56:10 PM »
What kills me is the number of "helpful" people who can't understand why a person was upset over having their possessions destroyed because they were "just trying to help." How oblivious can someone be?

This gives me chills because I had an ex who specialized in this kind of thing. It went like this:

X destroys something of mine.
I object.
X spits: "I was just trying to help!!!"
X now has an excuse to be angry at ME. And I am guilty for making X mad.

#### RubyCat

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• Posts: 591
##### Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #143 on: March 10, 2014, 03:04:00 PM »
Quote
the hostess who took the honey-glazed spiral ham brought by her brother or brother in law, trimmed it down and served it as slices of ham because no one needed the fat or the sugar!
I read this to DH. His jaw dropped and he turned red with rage! (He blushes easily, and is a teddy bear.) We loves us some Honey Baked Ham.

Back on topic: In this case, the help offered was very good, and could have been badly needed by someone else.

I'm pretty sure I've told this before. I had fallen off a horse, and was badly bruised all up one side. About a week later, when all the bruises were beautifully colored, I sneezed. That's how I found out I had broken a couple of ribs in the same fall. Of course, it was the middle of the night, and DH was asleep, and I had to wake him up to take me to the ED.

He gets mad when I am hurt - mad because I am hurt, not mad at me. When he is really mad, he looks dangerous, as if he might explode violently any second. It can be really scary to anyone who doesn't know him. So, during intake, he is sitting back, angry, while I am talking to the very nice male nurse. He noticed the old bruises and my explosive-looking DH, and leaned in to quietly ask me, "Do you need a safe place to stay tonight?" Deity bless him! It made me laugh, which hurt. But I thanked him warmly all the same.
<Snip>
Doesn't any woman or child that goes in to the ER with bruises/broken bones not directly attributable to something like a car accident get asked that question.

I went to the ER with a leg cramp (it really was that bad) and got asked "Are you safe in your home" before they would let DH see me.

Where I work, we are required to screen each patient for domestic violence or neglect as part of our admission process. We are also required to screen for depression and suicide risk. Some people are taken aback, and at least one was offended at first, but I try to explain that we ask these questions of everyone and are not singling them out.

#### squeakers

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##### Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #144 on: March 10, 2014, 03:11:47 PM »
Quote
I hope you don't feel badly about that.  How were you supposed to know?  Youre not a mind-reader.  If I saw a pie, and nobody told me otherwise, I'd presume it was a dessert item.

Really?  That's I interesting to me.  Are you American?  Do you have a much bigger tradition of sweet pies than savoury?  I'm British, and I'd find a savoury pie as likely as sweet.

We really just don't "do" savory pies in the US.  Most people would know what chicken pot pie and maybe shepherds pie are, but those are very definite exceptions - and (apart from chicken pot pie) pretty much any savory pie you might find here would be considered a British (i.e. "ethnic") dish.  We definitely don't do the combination of meat + sweet that y'all have over there - an English friend brought some mince pies to a Christmas party and nearly everyone thought they were really odd.  (I loved them, but then I do love sweet dishes in just about every variety . . .)

But mince pies don't contain meat ( which isn't to say they are necessarily vegetarian lard and suet may be in the recipe)

They are supposed to have meat.  Now they are mainly a fruit pie but when they were still called "minced meat pies" they were made from delicious meat. http://whatscookingamerica.net/History/PieHistory/MincemeatPie.htm
"I feel sarcasm is the lowest form of wit." "It is so low, in fact, that Miss Manners feels sure you would not want to resort to it yourself, even in your own defense. We do not believe in retaliatory rudeness." Judith Martin

#### Coralreef

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##### Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #145 on: March 10, 2014, 03:21:52 PM »
The EX was known to interfere with cooking.  He would lower the oven temperature if you turned your back.  Then complain the meat wasn't cooked enough.  Also adding ingredients that didn't belong to the dish.  He would do that everywhere and anywhere, not just at home.

DD and her DH will follow instructions to the letter, so they're the only ones allowed in my kitchen for now.

[/right

#### zyrs

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##### Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #146 on: March 10, 2014, 04:01:34 PM »
Former short-term girlfriend who demanded wanted to help me renovate my house.

I collect stamps.   A former girlfriend licked all of my mint stamps and stuck them to album pages because she was helping me while I was at work.

I just read this one to my stamp collecting DH. "Where is she buried?", he would like to know.

I believe she is still alive - we did end up breaking up soon after though.

#### Sara Crewe

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• Posts: 2931
##### Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #147 on: March 10, 2014, 05:01:15 PM »
Quote
I hope you don't feel badly about that.  How were you supposed to know?  Youre not a mind-reader.  If I saw a pie, and nobody told me otherwise, I'd presume it was a dessert item.

Really?  That's I interesting to me.  Are you American?  Do you have a much bigger tradition of sweet pies than savoury?  I'm British, and I'd find a savoury pie as likely as sweet.

We really just don't "do" savory pies in the US.  Most people would know what chicken pot pie and maybe shepherds pie are, but those are very definite exceptions - and (apart from chicken pot pie) pretty much any savory pie you might find here would be considered a British (i.e. "ethnic") dish.  We definitely don't do the combination of meat + sweet that y'all have over there - an English friend brought some mince pies to a Christmas party and nearly everyone thought they were really odd.  (I loved them, but then I do love sweet dishes in just about every variety . . .)

But mince pies don't contain meat ( which isn't to say they are necessarily vegetarian lard and suet may be in the recipe)

They are supposed to have meat.  Now they are mainly a fruit pie but when they were still called "minced meat pies" they were made from delicious meat. http://whatscookingamerica.net/History/PieHistory/MincemeatPie.htm

I know that traditionally (as in centuries ago) they had meat, but in the UK, the mince pies we eat in bulk each Christmas don't and I certainly wouldn't say they were supposed to (I suppose this is another UK/US difference like expecting coffee cake to taste of coffee)

#### nayberry

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##### Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #148 on: March 10, 2014, 05:06:18 PM »
Quote
I hope you don't feel badly about that.  How were you supposed to know?  Youre not a mind-reader.  If I saw a pie, and nobody told me otherwise, I'd presume it was a dessert item.

Really?  That's I interesting to me.  Are you American?  Do you have a much bigger tradition of sweet pies than savoury?  I'm British, and I'd find a savoury pie as likely as sweet.

We really just don't "do" savory pies in the US.  Most people would know what chicken pot pie and maybe shepherds pie are, but those are very definite exceptions - and (apart from chicken pot pie) pretty much any savory pie you might find here would be considered a British (i.e. "ethnic") dish.  We definitely don't do the combination of meat + sweet that y'all have over there - an English friend brought some mince pies to a Christmas party and nearly everyone thought they were really odd.  (I loved them, but then I do love sweet dishes in just about every variety . . .)

But mince pies don't contain meat ( which isn't to say they are necessarily vegetarian lard and suet may be in the recipe)

They are supposed to have meat.  Now they are mainly a fruit pie but when they were still called "minced meat pies" they were made from delicious meat. http://whatscookingamerica.net/History/PieHistory/MincemeatPie.htm

I know that traditionally (as in centuries ago) they had meat, but in the UK, the mince pies we eat in bulk each Christmas don't and I certainly wouldn't say they were supposed to (I suppose this is another UK/US difference like expecting coffee cake to taste of coffee)

the Mince pies we have at christmas  are evolved from these, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mince_pie   many years ago, ie cromwellian times, they had meat but by the time the victorian era came about they'd changed to be the sweet pies we know nowadays

#### aiki

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##### Re: Stop helping me! (Share your stories)
« Reply #149 on: March 10, 2014, 05:09:51 PM »
Quote
I hope you don't feel badly about that.  How were you supposed to know?  You`re not a mind-reader.  If I saw a pie, and nobody told me otherwise, I'd presume it was a dessert item.

Really?  That's I interesting to me.  Are you American?  Do you have a much bigger tradition of sweet pies than savoury?  I'm British, and I'd find a savoury pie as likely as sweet.

We really just don't "do" savory pies in the US.  Most people would know what chicken pot pie and maybe shepherds pie are, but those are very definite exceptions - and (apart from chicken pot pie) pretty much any savory pie you might find here would be considered a British (i.e. "ethnic") dish.  We definitely don't do the combination of meat + sweet that y'all have over there - an English friend brought some mince pies to a Christmas party and nearly everyone thought they were really odd.  (I loved them, but then I do love sweet dishes in just about every variety . . .)

But mince pies don't contain meat ( which isn't to say they are necessarily vegetarian lard and suet may be in the recipe)

They used to - but I think that's only done by historically inclined foodies today.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/foodanddrink/10476667/Potted-histories-mince-pies.html
"A true gentleman is one who is never unintentionally rude."  - Oscar Wilde