Author Topic: What do I say on my review?  (Read 3909 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Kiwichick

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1699
  • Is anyone else hungry now?
Re: What do I say on my review?
« Reply #30 on: March 17, 2014, 01:21:31 PM »
Quote
(bolded)  According to who?  As I pointed out, OP said Reviewing Manager wouldn't give specific examples or names.


The reason I went to this other manager is that she is one of the co-workers in my building ( I report to a manger in another building). She is one of the supposed coworkers that was having problems with me. 

^^ According to this.


Then what Iím missing is where OP said in her opening post that Reviewing Manager said that (name of manager) has had problems with her.  (Third time I've pointed that out.)  On top of that, various suggestions to OP about how to respond point out that OPís boss refused to give examples or name names.

But, more importantly, (as I already said) it might be better to focus on the work.

It's in the OPs first post 'She said that most of them have problems approaching me, and that they all feel that I am talking down to them'. Saying 'they all feel' that way includes the other manager.


POF

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2672
Re: What do I say on my review?
« Reply #31 on: March 17, 2014, 03:00:47 PM »
I can give you a similar situation:

I had an employee keep telling me that I over react to certain situations.  So I set her down and said .... what about my actions made you feel I was over reacting ? Did I yell, raise my voice, make threatening gestures, use inappropriate language ? No she said - you called in the person I was complaining about.   I asked her .. well how else could I help mediate this issue ? Her response ... silence.

I think you need to ask the manager.... ( and be prepared and OK to hear an honest perhaps not wanted aswer )
Do I belittle them verbally by my use of words, sighing, being inpatient ? Do I roll my eyes ? is it possible that they are upset becasue they have to wait a reasonable amount of time to get a question asked.

For you to think about... Is it possible that the things that I am being asked are not really my responsibility to answer ?

Sometimes these things are becasue people end up with unrealistic expectations of what other staff should be doing.  Good Luck !


earthgirl

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 177
Re: What do I say on my review?
« Reply #32 on: March 17, 2014, 03:06:06 PM »
OP, could you focus on the solution instead of the problem? Ask what your manager expects you to do differently in order for this not to be an issue? Or are you hesitant to do that because it would seem too much like you're admitting to doing something wrong in the first place? (which I would understand)

ShadowLady

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2862
  • My mind is like a steel trap-illegal in 13 states.
Re: What do I say on my review?
« Reply #33 on: March 18, 2014, 12:30:20 AM »
OP, could you focus on the solution instead of the problem? Ask what your manager expects you to do differently in order for this not to be an issue? Or are you hesitant to do that because it would seem too much like you're admitting to doing something wrong in the first place? (which I would understand)

That is why I was asking for examples on how I am talking down to them.  Wendy told me to stop doing that, but without an example of how I did that, how do I know what I did wrong?  I have tried thinking over my interactions with coworkers, and cannot think of what I have done to give people that feeling.

earthgirl

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 177
Re: What do I say on my review?
« Reply #34 on: March 19, 2014, 10:32:03 AM »
OP, could you focus on the solution instead of the problem? Ask what your manager expects you to do differently in order for this not to be an issue? Or are you hesitant to do that because it would seem too much like you're admitting to doing something wrong in the first place? (which I would understand)

That is why I was asking for examples on how I am talking down to them.  Wendy told me to stop doing that, but without an example of how I did that, how do I know what I did wrong?  I have tried thinking over my interactions with coworkers, and cannot think of what I have done to give people that feeling.

I understand, and it just might mean a difference in the language that you use.  Instead of saying, "What exactly did I do wrong?" you'd be saying "What exactly can I do right?"  So you're focusing on something positive in the future, instead of a (theoretically) negative event in the past.  Ask for your supervisor to model for you how she'd prefer you talk to people, and even if she can't/won't, you can certainly document on your evaluation that you've asked for suggestions on your communication style and are open to feedback.