Recently, my youngest stepson proposed to his GF. Neither Jeff nor his fiancee are frequent FB-ers, but they both have accounts and post occasionally. When Allie accepted Jeff's proposal, they didn't run immediately to FB to post about their engagement. Enter my DIL, Michelle.
Michelle and Rob, my oldest stepson, had a baby, Caitlin, a few months ago. Michelle is a very frequent FB-er. She posts a lot of photos of Caitlin. Nearly every day, there are more photos of Caitlin. The day after Allie and Jeff became engaged, Michelle posted a photo of Caitlin with the caption, "Caitlin is so happy to have a new aunt!" And then she congratulated Allie and Jeff on their engagement and tagged them in the photo of Caitlin. I should note: Allie and Jeff live in another state. They've seen Caitlin once since she was born. Caitlin is a baby, and she has no idea what an "aunt" is. So, the idea of Caitlin being happy about a new aunt is kind of silly.
DH and I were not happy that Michelle did this. We thought it wasn't her place to make a FB announcement about Jeff and Allie's engagement. It also seemed opportunistic to use their engagement as another chance to post a photo of Caitlin. Notably, Michelle did the same thing yesterday for some news that involves her sister. Caitlin is thrilled that Michelle's sister successfully defended her dissertation. Fortunately, Michelle's sister had already made her own announcement before Michelle did it. Jeff and Allie didn't get that courtesy.
We saw Jeff and Allie the day after they became engaged. I was there as the two of them tried to decide whether it was still worth posting their own engagement announcement on FB. Allie said, "Well, Michelle tagged us in that photo, so everyone already knows." I suggested that they could change their relationship
statuses. That would still be an announcement, but maybe a quieter one. Allie shrugged her shoulders and looked down.
When Michelle and Rob were engaged, no one posted about it before they did. They made a big, splashy announcement with numerous photos of the build-up to the big moment, which culminated in the presentation of the ring, which had several photos all by itself.
When Caitlin was born, no one posted about the birth on FB before Michelle and Rob. As excited as everyone was, we all waited until they made their announcement.
I think it was rude of Michelle to post about Jeff and Allie's engagement before they did. I also have an issue with the way Michelle did it. It seems attention-grabby to me, as if she is looking for an opportunity to post more photos of Caitlin. But more than that, I think she stole Jeff and Allie's thunder. Allie may have had wishes or dreams for how she might post her engagement announcement. She and Jeff may have had plans for how they wanted to do that together. They could still do that ... But it might not feel the same since Michelle announced it.
What do you think?