Gift Ideas - token-ish?

[GreenHall]

My dad is getting married in April.  He is not registered anywhere, I asked and they don't want anything.  I feel like I should give some sort of token gift at least.  They don't  need anything, and anything they might want they can buy a higher end version of than I can.

I'm thinking about a nice bottle of ...something.  Something that would be celebratory in nature for now, or for an anniversary.  Any ideas?  Should I just go to my local liquor store and ask for advice (especially since I am now cutting this so close?)  I don't know much about wine, or good liquor.

*I was considering a picture like a cousin got for her wedding with a bride and groom image made from the names of the people in the wedding, but I'm not certain the image would be as identifiable with 2 grooms - the big white dress image is definitely a shortcut to saying 'wedding'!

[TootsNYC]

In these situations, we go for:
    -incredible champagne (sometimes Dom Perignon for the name value w/ people who will value it; other times a brand recommended by the wine shop, since we don't know wine)
    -incredible coffee (Kona, or other)

Incredible wine would be good as well. Maybe something that's supposed to age well by 5 years? w/ a note about the anniversary?
   And yeah, I'd go to the local wine shop that has a pretty good rep. Maybe ask around about the wine-shop recommendation, instead of a specific-wine recommendation.


The other option is to give something incredibly emotional--like a framed pic of you w/ Dad and the new-spouse-to-be, if you happen to have a shot. Something that indicates, "We accept you as a member of our family!"

It's tight timing, of course, but maybe a calligrapher could make a wall hanging w/ their names? And maybe all the other family members' names around the outside, like a "family cloud" instead of a "family tree'?
   I hesitate to give these sorts of "decor" art, because it's so easy to miss in terms of taste, and it's the sort of thing people can't pretend to appreciate unless they actually hang it up.

[Kaypeep]

I'd get them a gift certificate for a very nice restaurant.  If you really want to splurge, a gift certificate to a weekend away (B&B or something like that.)  When my uncle got married for the 4th time, my family (mom, bro and sis and I) all chipped in together and gave them a GC for a weekend away at a very nice resort.  It's something we couldn't have swung on our own, but combined together it was a nice treat.  If you have some other family who may be thinking the same as you about giving something, maybe you can go in on it together.

As a non-drinker (a social drink once in a while) I don't care for wine or spirits as a gift.  I have 2 bottles of champagne and too many other bottles of assorted wine and spirits for years which have been gifts over the years.  I have no idea when I'll ever open them.  Every dinner party I have people bring their own wine or beverage of choice so I never get a chance to use them.  Unless you know your dad and FSM will enjoy a bottle of something, I'd avoid that as a gift. 

[Harriet Jones]

Going with something consumable is a good idea.   Is there some sort of treat they like?  What about a gift card towards a favorite activity?

[lowspark]

I've said this before but when people tell me they want nothing, I take them at their word. So I would not get them any kind of framed picture or artwork or anything like that. Now, something consumable? Sure. As long as you know that it's something they would like to consume. So if your dad's a scotch drinker, for example, don't get him a bottle of tequila, regardless of how high quality it is. Get him scotch.

So if you're going with wine, I'd just go with the recommendation of a good liquor store. But first, if possible, if you don't already know their wine preferences, I'd either look to see what kinds of wine they have in their current stock or just ask. Just as in the scotch example, if they prefer dry reds, no matter how expensive and fabulous the bottle is, if you buy them a sweet white it won't be as appreciated.

And just a comment on champagne. Not everyone likes it. I don't drink champagne at all because I really don't like any fizzy drinks. I don't drink any kind of coke and to me, champagne is just a carbonated white wine. So again, make sure it's something they would normally like to drink.

[TootsNYC]

I like the restaurant gift certificate.

[whatsanenigma]

I think that 99% of the time, a donation to a charity is not a good gift. 

This situation might fall in that 1% where it might be a good gift.  Put the "proof" that you did it into a very personal card and I think you would be good to go.

As long as you know for a fact they both support that charity, of course.

[BigBadBetty]

I agree with the suggestions for a restaurant gift certificate. I don't know where you live, but several cities in the U.S. has a group called <City Name> Originals. You can buy a gift certificate that you can use at any of the independent restaurants that belong to the group. Here's an example from Nashville: http://nashvilleoriginals.com/gift-certificates/.

[purple]

You could purchase and name a star in their honour?

[katycoo]

I have 2 bottles of champagne and too many other bottles of assorted wine and spirits for years which have been gifts over the years.  I have no idea when I'll ever open them. 

Regift the champagne.  Unlike other wines its not really designed to be stored.

There are exceptions, of course, but proper cellaring is required.  May as well giove them to someon who'll drink them before they're off.

[ktanne]

POD on re-gifting Champagne if you receive a bottle that you know you'll never drink.  I LOVE Champagne, and hate seeing a bottle go to waste 

One of my favourite wedding gift ideas for those that do drink wine, is a bottle of red that is recommended for cellaring for 5-10 years... buy a nice presentation box, and either hand letter onto the box, or print a sticker, with the date of the wedding and a note to drink on the 5th/6th/10th/ whichever anniversary.  (Obviously you could do the same with a white - there are some great Australian Chardonnays that benefit from 3-4 years cellaring) 

For those that don't drink, and that have everything material they need, I often give handmade token gifts.  Usually food.

[Rohanna]

Do they support a charity? Normally they say not to "gift" charitable donations but I think personally it would be okay if it's one they like and they asked for no gifts.

[cicero]

I've said this before but when people tell me they want nothing, I take them at their word. So I would not get them any kind of framed picture or artwork or anything like that. Now, something consumable? Sure. As long as you know that it's something they would like to consume. So if your dad's a scotch drinker, for example, don't get him a bottle of tequila, regardless of how high quality it is. Get him scotch.

So if you're going with wine, I'd just go with the recommendation of a good liquor store. But first, if possible, if you don't already know their wine preferences, I'd either look to see what kinds of wine they have in their current stock or just ask. Just as in the scotch example, if they prefer dry reds, no matter how expensive and fabulous the bottle is, if you buy them a sweet white it won't be as appreciated.

And just a comment on champagne. Not everyone likes it. I don't drink champagne at all because I really don't like any fizzy drinks. I don't drink any kind of coke and to me, champagne is just a carbonated white wine. So again, make sure it's something they would normally like to drink.

i agree with this. I would get them *something* but not a wall hanging/artsy photo etc. a nice bottle of wine (ask in the store), or other liquor (are they scotch/whiskey/vodka people?), a GC to a nice restaurant, or to a store/hobby/movie theater you know they like, etc. This isn't a young couple just starting out who can "always" use an extra set of glasses or doodads. I assume your father is at least 40, it's not his first marriage, and they really don't want or need additional *stuff*

when my dad got married for the third time (first time he was widowed, second time divorced/ she was twice divorced, second marriage lasted about a minute), they specifically asked for no gifts, had a tiny wedding. after a year, i guess they decided they are staying together and threw a nice big party - I think we got them fancy wine IIRC.

[Lady Snowdon]

I agree with those who suggest a consumable of some sort.  I occasionally make flavored vodka, and there are some great recipes online for that, if they're into mixed drinks at all.  A food treat of some kind, like truffles or the brand of coffee you know they love but hardly ever buy, would be great as well.  Something to say, "I recognize this day is special to you, and here's something special from me". 

[GreenHall]

THanks all for the insight.
THey do drink wine and liquor, which is why I though a nice bottle would be a good gift.
The places that personalize bottles don't seem to have images to see how noticible it is. 
I found a very shiny bottle Johnnie Walker Gold that seems promising...