Author Topic: "Stealing" a Baby Name  (Read 35264 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

DaDancingPsych

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1857
Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #75 on: April 01, 2014, 12:48:28 PM »
I didn't read all the replies, but I agree that your friend is being crazy in thinking that she owns a name. I am sad that she is getting upset, because this could have been a cute name story. "My mom's best friend's daughter is also named Charlotte. It wasn't planned that way, they just both liked the name, but it's a fun connection!"

VorFemme

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 13186
  • Strolls with scissors! Too tired to run today!
Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #76 on: April 01, 2014, 01:14:42 PM »
Stealing something usually means that the person who originally had it no longer has it or the use of it...

The name is still out there and can be used - although I can see why first cousins the same age with the same name in the same town MIGHT be confusing - it's happened before in families, I'm sure (there have been several stories about that situation in this very thread).

Non-relatives who have mother who were friends growing up but now live a continent or half a continent away?  Not really an issue.  Besides, when the baby is born, it might be a boy named Charles instead of Charlotte.  It might be a girl who looks much more like an Emma than a Charlotte.
Let sleeping dragons be.......morning breath......need I say more?

MyFamily

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4610
Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #77 on: April 01, 2014, 02:18:06 PM »
A friend just reminded me of a story.  My friend's mentor's wife (Leah) was killed in a tragic accident - it was horrible - she had kids who were in their late teens, early 20's and then a child as young as only a few months old.  My friend was pregnant at the time, and the name they'd picked out (before the accident) for a girl was Leah.  When their daughter was born, they realized that many people would assume they were naming their daughter after Leah, and they realized it would be very important to her children to be the ones to first name their children after their beloved mother.  So, they picked a different name.  No one asked them to not name their daughter Leah, no one suggested it would be a bad idea, but they didn't even want to potentially hint at causing Leah's family any pain.


"The test of good manners is to be patient with bad ones" - Solomon ibn Gabirol

bansidhe

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2073
    • The Menagerie
Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #78 on: April 07, 2014, 07:55:25 PM »
I love the names Angharad, Bronwyn, and Aisling.  Maybe I'll use them for the next cats who show up here.  I wonder how many women named Lara [from Dr. Zhivago] and Demelza [from Poldark] are out there.

<--- That's my Aisling.  :)

I was almost named Lara, but my parents changed their minds at the last minute and I got stuck with Jennifer.  :-\

Pertaining to this thread - OP's friend needs to get over herself.  OP mentioned the name first, and they don't even live in the same part of the country.

POD. Friend is being absurd.
Esan ozenki!

Arizona

jackie jormp jomp

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 120
Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #79 on: April 07, 2014, 10:19:51 PM »

...either get over it or die mad.
Oh my lord I am stealing this amazing phrase.

Shopgirl

  • Jr. Member
  • *
  • Posts: 29
Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #80 on: April 13, 2014, 02:56:42 PM »
If she was pregnant with a baby girl I might feel differently but in this case you are good. You mentioned the name to her and she may never have a child or a girl.

My uncle tried to pull this with my mother. She wanted to name my brother after her father but uncle said she couldn't because if he had a boy he was planning on using the name. He wasn't married at the time (and wouldn't be for another 10 years) and never had any children. Glad my mother didn't listen.

Oh Joy

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1405
Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #81 on: April 13, 2014, 03:36:44 PM »
Never mind that 7,418 new baby girls were named Charlotte in the US in 2012 alone http://www.ssa.gov/cgi-bin/popularnames.cgi.  If she's going to be mad at you, she has a lot of other parents to be mad at.   ;)

camlan

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 8783
Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #82 on: April 13, 2014, 09:45:51 PM »
If she was pregnant with a baby girl I might feel differently but in this case you are good. You mentioned the name to her and she may never have a child or a girl.

My uncle tried to pull this with my mother. She wanted to name my brother after her father but uncle said she couldn't because if he had a boy he was planning on using the name. He wasn't married at the time (and wouldn't be for another 10 years) and never had any children. Glad my mother didn't listen.

I have five cousins named "Walter," after my grandfather. The only reason I don't have a brother named Walter is that my parents felt that Dad's oldest brother should be the first to be able to name a son Walter. Dad's other siblings didn't feel the same way, so there were 4 Walters before the eldest brother finally, after 5 girls, had a son. I do have a brother with Walter as his middle name.

We have large family get-togethers. Between the cousins and their children and one in-law, there are 9 men named Walter. We don't have any trouble telling them apart. There's Walt the 3rd, Evil Walt, Slimy Walt, Crazy Walt and Sam (he chose to go by his middle name).
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says, “I’m possible!” –Audrey Hepburn


Morty'sCleaningLady

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 3242
Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #83 on: April 17, 2014, 01:32:55 PM »
I have a sister Chris, a male cousin Chris, and an Aunt Kris.  No one is confused and no one felt usurped. 

Tell your friend to get over her bad self.  Seriously.

My cousin Chris married a Kris! 

And my uncle Joseph married a Patricia, same name as his sister.  Their eldest son, about 5 years older than me, was always Pat, same as his mom (and aunt).  Shocked at his wedding to learn that he was Joseph Patrick.  Joseph Patrick III came along two years later. 

You are expecting and she isn't.  She may never need the name.
Formerly Mrs.Bart

mime

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 808
Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #84 on: April 17, 2014, 05:26:54 PM »

OP, I'm just repeating others when I say the most amusing thing about this is that YOU first said you were thinking of using the name. It's like you're holding a candy bar, she yanks it from your hand, then insists you can't touch HER candy!  :o

Charlotte is a beautiful name. I have an Aunt (in her 60s) and a SIL (in her 40s) with that name; it seems to be a timeless name without having been over-used.

When it comes to name-stealing, of course I think it isn't even possible, but I completely appreciate the claim if the name is really unusual.

My son is 9 and I didn't know anyone at all with his name when he was born ("Levi", which may be uncommon, but not at all unusual). I was very happy about that. Now his name is growing steadily in popularity and I'm a bit disappointed because I liked it being unique. I never would have tried to prevent a loved-one from using it on their own child, though!

I wonder how a person would feel if someone had a unique naming approach that someone 'stole' rather than the specific name (like "I'm going to name all my daughters after Disney princesses... Tianna, Ariel, and Belle), then someone else, like her SIL, comes along and names her kids Jasmine and Aurora. I can imagine some people getting really territorial!


baglady

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4662
  • A big lass and a bonny lass and she loves her beer
Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #85 on: April 17, 2014, 08:11:54 PM »
I'm friends with two couples who both have daughters named Rebecca, born within weeks of each other. Rebecca B. was born in December 1975; Rebecca C. was born in January 1976. The couples are still close friends, and so are the daughters. There were never any hard feelings or accusations of "theft," although it did get a little confusing when the girls were younger and both going by Becky (Rebecca B. is Becca now). Rebecca B.'s parents took to calling Becky C. "B.C." She still answers to it.

Both families have been volunteering for years at a local music festival. One year, all the junior members of one of the volunteer crews -- except one -- were named Becky: two of them were my friends' daughters. They became known as "The Beckys," and the one who wasn't Becky would answer to the name.

My name is Beverly, and I have a sister named Linda and a brother named Michael. I was married to a Michael whose mom's name is Linda. Bagman's ex (we're friendly) is Linda and has a sister named Beverly and a brother named Tom. Bagman also has a brother named Tom, and in addition to his current girlfriend being named Beverly (me), his high-school sweetheart (also still friends) is also a Beverly (he refers to her as Bev the First). Oh, and I share my name with a late aunt -- for a while there when I was younger we were Big Beverly and Little Beverly.

My current circle of friends is awash in Daves, Sues and Gregs.

This is just what happens with common, classic or popular-with-their-generation names. And I'm not even from a culture where it's common to name children after living or dead relatives. It's not theft; it's "great minds think alike."
My photography is on Redbubble! Come see: http://www.redbubble.com/people/baglady

Allyson

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2066
Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #86 on: April 18, 2014, 02:33:31 PM »
I agree totally, baglady! that's too funny about the Beckys! I wonder if this "stealing a name" is a relatively modern phenomenon?  From what I've read, "popular" names used to be used for a much larger percentage of the population--so you really might have 20 percent of people named Mary and John. Today I think there's more variation, and much more concern about giving the kid a name that's not too popular.

It's fun to look at different generations/regions and see what names are popular everywhere and which change. Like you I know a ton of Daves, but no Sues or Georges. For me is Chris, Matt, Mike, and Sarah!

Carotte

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1196
Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #87 on: April 18, 2014, 05:43:58 PM »
Today I think there's more variation, and much more concern about giving the kid a name that's not too popular.


SO has a cousin who recently had a baby boy, they wanted something not too popular, they unknowingly choose one that is turning into the top 5 for this year.

gmatoy

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1406
Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #88 on: April 18, 2014, 07:45:22 PM »
I went to high school with a girl who was "LindaSue" and her parents had friends who name their daughter "Linda Jo". (Not the real names.) The girls were the same age and loved having someone to share their name. And everyone in our circle always said "Linda Jo" because that made it go with "LindaSue" better!

Elfmama

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 6301
Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #89 on: April 18, 2014, 08:48:18 PM »
Sister's first husband was Richard.  His father was Richard.  My grandfather was also Richard, and my younger brother was named after him.  When someone called the house during a family reunion and asked for Richard, Sister answered, "Which one?  We're having a special on Richards today, four for the price of one."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
It's true. Money can't buy happiness.  You have to turn it
into books first.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~