Author Topic: "Stealing" a Baby Name  (Read 33780 times)

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bah12

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Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #30 on: March 28, 2014, 11:02:45 AM »
I would be more sympathetic to your friend has she told you that she loved the name Charlotte and suddenly you said "Oh! What a great idea...that will by my daughter's name!"  And even then, I would have said it was silly of her to lay claim to a name (or at the least tell everyone about it) before she was even expecting.

Her telling you it was "her" name after you told her you were considering it means not stolen.  Her having a fit about it is insane and not something I would waste much energy worrying about.

rose red

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Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #31 on: March 28, 2014, 11:19:09 AM »
Remind her that you did not steal the name. You said the name first.

If you are brave enough, ask her if there's something else going on. Sounds like this is about more than a name. Like a PP, I find it suspicious that she claimed the name after you mentioned it.

bopper

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Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #32 on: March 28, 2014, 11:28:21 AM »
"We live so far apart that it won't be an issue, and if anyone says anything you can say "We both independently came up with that name and decided we didn't care what other people thought and they could be Charlotte-cousins.""

jaxsue

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Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #33 on: March 28, 2014, 11:46:31 AM »
Your "friend" needs to find a chair and have a seat.  You are pregnant, she is not. So basically she has made your pregnancy choices all about her.  Really?  Really?

This conversation is a gift, you now know more about her than you did before.  Use that information wisely.

ITA!

OP, when my mom was expecting my oldest brother, my aunt and uncle were also expecting. My parents were going to name him David, but my aunt/uncle had their son and named him that. My parents, not wanting the confusion of 2 David Smiths (last name changed) in the family, named my brother Daniel. Ironically, we saw this cousin TWICE in our lives!  ::)

Name your baby the way you want to. Ignore her; she's being ridiculous.

shhh its me

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Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #34 on: March 28, 2014, 11:52:48 AM »
  No one owns names but I would have some sympathy for a person who made up a name, was resurrecting one thats fallen out of use or spent months researching and most importantly TOLD YOU FIRST.

Evil me would be imagining , slowly pick up the spray bottle I have for seedlings and give her a squirt in the face every time she mentioned.   

HGolightly

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Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #35 on: March 28, 2014, 12:02:00 PM »
The odds are high that she will even change her mind IF the time comes. Her future partner might have an opinion about that. Years ago having the " what if? " conversation with my hubby he and I each had a beloved name for a boy and a girl. Guess what? Neither our daughter nor son have those names.  When we had dd we had a boys name picked out. Guess what? We did not use that boys name for our son. For him, we chose a name that happens to be the same as the son of an acquaintance. Things change. Use Charlotte because the world needs more Charlottes :) Congratulations and good luck with everything! And nap because naps are wonderful

Elisabunny

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Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #36 on: March 28, 2014, 01:02:18 PM »
Your "friend" needs to find a chair and have a seat.  You are pregnant, she is not. So basically she has made your pregnancy choices all about her.  Really?  Really?

This conversation is a gift, you now know more about her than you did before.  Use that information wisely.

ITA!

OP, when my mom was expecting my oldest brother, my aunt and uncle were also expecting. My parents were going to name him David, but my aunt/uncle had their son and named him that. My parents, not wanting the confusion of 2 David Smiths (last name changed) in the family, named my brother Daniel. Ironically, we saw this cousin TWICE in our lives!  ::)

Name your baby the way you want to. Ignore her; she's being ridiculous.

We had a similar situation.  A cousin gave their son a family name we had been considering.  Since they have the same last name, we struck it off our list of possibilities. 

However, we have two nephews named Joe.  My eldest daughter's name and a male cousin's are homophones.  There are various other cousin pairs with very similar names. 

And for non-family names, when I was growing up, my church class had nine girls.  One-third of them were named Elizabeth/Elisabeth.  Somehow, we all survived.  ::)
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Alli8098

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Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #37 on: March 28, 2014, 01:14:01 PM »
We have two Jessica's in our family.  My first cousin whom I used to babysit, and my DD.  And no, I did not name DD after my first cousin.  We really liked the name and of course after DD was born Jessica is what suited her.  My cousin lives in another state and there has been no confusion having two Jessica's in the family.  I think my grandmother is tickled to have a granddaughter and great-granddaughter with the same first name.

Your friend and her potential DD won't die if you use the name Charlotte.

The Wild One, Forever

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Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #38 on: March 28, 2014, 01:19:16 PM »
When my cousin got pregnant with her second child, the boy name she wanted was the same as my son's.  It's an old fashioned family name, and I was a little taken aback, but she had enough going on in her life at the time, so of course, I didn't make an issue of it.  On the maternal side of my family, we cousins are as close as siblings, and our children are also very close, so it would have been a little confusing at times, but no big deal.

Then, she found out she was having a girl.  The name they chose?  The very same unusual name we had picked for a girl when we were expecting Son!  I love the name, and I was tickled that I obviously have such good taste.    ;)  (She did choose a different middle name, however, and the entire name is beautiful.)  I can't remember if I had ever told her what our "girl" name was, but I am thinking they came up with it entirely on their own. 
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Winterlight

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Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #39 on: March 28, 2014, 01:40:46 PM »
She's being ridiculous. Ignore her with a clear conscience.
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z_squared82

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Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #40 on: March 28, 2014, 02:03:10 PM »
She's being silly.

Funny aside, my sister-in-law and I are in a race to have a baby girl so we can claim the name Juanita. It's my grandma's name and her mom's name.

Funnier thing? They aren't trying and I have no man in my life so that "race" is at a snail's pace with pit stops. :)

blueyzca01

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Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #41 on: March 28, 2014, 02:14:41 PM »
I have a sister Chris, a male cousin Chris, and an Aunt Kris.  No one is confused and no one felt usurped. 

Tell your friend to get over her bad self.  Seriously.
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jayhawk

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Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #42 on: March 28, 2014, 02:21:39 PM »
Just want to add my agreement.  Congratulations on your pregnancy and Charlotte is a lovely name.


Your "friend" needs to find a chair and have a seat.  You are pregnant, she is not. So basically she has made your pregnancy choices all about her.  Really?  Really?

This conversation is a gift, you now know more about her than you did before.  Use that information wisely.

The bolded above is the best thing I've read all day. Stealing it for future use.

MrsVandy

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Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #43 on: March 28, 2014, 02:27:33 PM »
Your friend is being ridiculous. She may want that name now but who knows what she'll want once she actually has a baby girl. I always wanted to name a baby girl Claudia, but now that I'm having my baby girl that won't be her name. Now my Dh and I agreed on Claire. A coworker likes Clara and is expecting as well, but she's not finding out the sex, is due months after me and doesn't care that the names are very similar.




Tia2

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Re: "Stealing" a Baby Name
« Reply #44 on: March 28, 2014, 02:40:39 PM »
I have a friend who from a young age knew exactly what unusual name she wanted to give her future daughter.

She then married a man with a daughter who had exactly that name.  Needless to say, when she had her little girl, she picked another name.

I do think naming a child the same thing as her older half sister who spends at least part of her time in the same household is probably the one situation where isn't really OK.