There are certain decisions that I can sympathize w/ the idea that the groom should butt out.
Wedding colors--oh, of course, intellectually I can see that he has as much right to choose as the bride, but it would be really frustrating to suddenly have to negotiate through that.
My friend went to register for china and discovered that her husband had strong opinions and insisted on being included in the decision. OK, fine, but then it turned out that he wanted something very different from what she'd had her heart set on. They ended up with something she didn't really love. And when they moved to a smaller space, they put it in storage bcs she didn't like it enough to find room for it in their place.
I was really sad on her behalf.
Her groom was a little competitive in lots of things--her mom made bookmarks that said "Susie and Sam," and he got all "why isn't my name first on half of them?" My friend finally pointed out that she'd be Mrs. Sam Smith for the rest of her life, and they'd be Mr. and Mrs. Sam Smith, and he'd be first on the tax returns; he could let her have the stupid bookmarks.
He also fully expected to go wedding-dress shopping with her. She finally made him ask the women in his office what they thought about that idea.
Wedding colors — he chose.
China — we're not registering for any, but he chose the dishes we bought when we moved into the house we bought together. Were they my absolute favorite? No. Were they his #1 choice? Also no. We compromised on something that both of us liked, that happened to be very different from either of our first choices.
Wedding dresses — he went with me to all the stores and saw every dress. The one I chose happened to be both of our favorites, and I wouldn't have even tried it on had he not pointed it out.
So far in planning this whole thing, the only time he has annoyed me with his opinion is when he is ambivalent but tries to be funny by saying "but it's your
wedding, my opinion doesn’t matter on this!"
I wouldn't be marrying him if he had no opinion on our
wedding. He wouldn't be marrying me if I wanted to make all of the decisions. The couple (or bride) in the OP isn't me, and maybe that works for their relationship
, but frankly, I feel bad for the both of them and immensely frustrated by the media who seem to think that couple is normal and we are not.