Author Topic: You are NOT invited to our wedding notice?  (Read 3720 times)

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mom2four

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Re: You are NOT invited to our wedding notice?
« Reply #15 on: April 28, 2014, 12:24:34 PM »
"So are most church weddings - in Denmark at least. Here it is not at all rude to attend a wedding ceremony even if you haven't been invited. Of course, you shouldn't crash the party afterwards."

We Danes call that attending a "stare wedding". We go to church to stare at the bride and groom and then go home. Perfectly acceptable.

purple

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Re: You are NOT invited to our wedding notice?
« Reply #16 on: April 28, 2014, 11:28:29 PM »
I could be wrong, but it is my understanding that churches are open to everybody all the time.

Margo

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Re: You are NOT invited to our wedding notice?
« Reply #17 on: April 29, 2014, 08:02:42 AM »
I think it depends on the church, and (I assume) local laws and customs.
Here in the UK churches (at least CofE churches) are generally public rather than private and church services are open to all.

Twik

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Re: You are NOT invited to our wedding notice?
« Reply #18 on: May 01, 2014, 12:01:38 PM »
I could be wrong, but it is my understanding that churches are open to everybody all the time.

While that may have been true at one time, they are normally locked now when not in use, for obvious security reasons. My mother still finds that hard to accept.
My cousin's memoir of love and loneliness while raising a child with multiple disabilities will be out on Amazon soon! Know the Night, by Maria Mutch, has been called "full of hope, light, and companionship for surviving the small hours of the night."

Lynn2000

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Re: You are NOT invited to our wedding notice?
« Reply #19 on: May 07, 2014, 04:08:41 PM »
I think it's a good idea to have a phrase in the back of one's mind for times when someone, perhaps in all innocence and good intentions, assumes they'll be invited to your wedding.

I could totally see this happening with my family. If I ever were to get married, I think I would want a very, very small wedding, like a dozen people total. In my family it's traditional to have a big white wedding with all the extended family. So I could see people saying, when they hear about my (hypothetical, future) engagement, "Congratulations! When's the wedding? I can't wait to see it!" with big smiles and everything. And I think it would be good if I could immediately say, "Thank you! Not sure when yet, but I think it's going to be just a very small wedding," in kind of a tone that suggests they (and many other people) might not be invited.

Okay, this is basically the definition of 'borrowing trouble,' but I could completely see my dad casually giving out the date and location to people and inviting them to "come on over"--the more, the merrier. I would almost want to issue an edict that said, "If you did not receive an invitation from me or my partner directly, you are not invited, please do not attend. Invitations issued from my dad do not count!"

Of course I never would. But I can see how some people in similar circumstances would be tempted. Combine "going against tradition in this circle" with "casual communication" and you can get a mess.
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BeagleMommy

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Re: You are NOT invited to our wedding notice?
« Reply #20 on: May 09, 2014, 09:10:29 AM »
Are wedding announcements no longer used?  Now, DH and I had the BWW so we had no need for announcements (nearly everyone who was invited showed up), but it used to be that people who were not invited to the wedding received a printed announcement stating something like:

Mr. & Mrs. Bride's Family announce the marriage of their daughter Brunhilda to Sigfried Smith, son of Mr. & Mrs. Groom's Family.  The wedding was performed on February 32, 2014 at Church.

Is this not done any more?

Kaymar

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Re: You are NOT invited to our wedding notice?
« Reply #21 on: May 09, 2014, 09:51:35 AM »
Are wedding announcements no longer used?  Now, DH and I had the BWW so we had no need for announcements (nearly everyone who was invited showed up), but it used to be that people who were not invited to the wedding received a printed announcement stating something like:

Mr. & Mrs. Bride's Family announce the marriage of their daughter Brunhilda to Sigfried Smith, son of Mr. & Mrs. Groom's Family.  The wedding was performed on February 32, 2014 at Church.

Is this not done any more?

I've never seen one... if you're looking for anecdata :)  It's not something I will be doing after my small wedding.

Krism

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Re: You are NOT invited to our wedding notice?
« Reply #22 on: May 09, 2014, 10:18:29 AM »
Are wedding announcements no longer used?  Now, DH and I had the BWW so we had no need for announcements (nearly everyone who was invited showed up), but it used to be that people who were not invited to the wedding received a printed announcement stating something like:

Mr. & Mrs. Bride's Family announce the marriage of their daughter Brunhilda to Sigfried Smith, son of Mr. & Mrs. Groom's Family.  The wedding was performed on February 32, 2014 at Church.

Is this not done any more?

I'm familiar with putting these types of announcements in the local paper but not necessarily printing and sending them to people.

ladyknight1

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Re: You are NOT invited to our wedding notice?
« Reply #23 on: May 09, 2014, 10:20:09 AM »
My FIL's family uses both wedding announcements and birth announcements for the large, widespread family. It's nice.

LtPowers

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Re: You are NOT invited to our wedding notice?
« Reply #24 on: May 12, 2014, 09:53:49 PM »
Is this not done any more?

In another recent thread some have expressed a view that announcements are so rare these days that some people might see it as a gift-grab.

All that notwithstanding, announcements are still the proper way to ... well, announce a recent marriage.


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