Author Topic: How do you sympathize? Do you?  (Read 6714 times)

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violinp

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Re: How do you sympathize? Do you?
« Reply #15 on: April 08, 2014, 03:07:28 PM »
My personal feeling is that the woman needs to get a grip. I cried when certain celebrities died, but I wasn't so incapacitated that others had to take on work I was supposed to do. There's a vast chasm of a difference between a relative dying and a talented person you never knew dying.
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Hillia

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Re: How do you sympathize? Do you?
« Reply #16 on: April 08, 2014, 03:18:13 PM »
My personal feeling is that the woman needs to get a grip. I cried when certain celebrities died, but I wasn't so incapacitated that others had to take on work I was supposed to do. There's a vast chasm of a difference between a relative dying and a talented person you never knew dying.

This.  If she tried to engage me directly with this attention seeking hysteria I would be hard put to not snap at her.  And I would be very, very irritated about having to cover her work so she could indulge herself.

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rose red

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Re: How do you sympathize? Do you?
« Reply #17 on: April 08, 2014, 03:20:32 PM »
Many years ago, I learned on the morning news that a person I was a fan of had died. I went to work and couldn't stop thinking about that person all day. So I understand strong emotions, but I can't understand being so devastated that you can't function and make sure everyone around you is aware of it.

As for Kurt Cobain, his death was many years ago. A fan might remember him fondly and with sadness on the anniversary, but what she's doing is over the top. Like others, I'm also wondering if it's a ploy for attention or an excuse to get off work.

I would just avoid/ignore her.

Outdoor Girl

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Re: How do you sympathize? Do you?
« Reply #18 on: April 08, 2014, 03:23:29 PM »
I would have no problem telling my supervisor that there was absolutely no way I was covering classes for this drama llama. 

If s/he is going to let her get away with this nonsense, s/he can cover the class.
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veronaz

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Re: How do you sympathize? Do you?
« Reply #19 on: April 08, 2014, 03:34:56 PM »
I'm reminded of the scene in the movie Airplane! where people are lining up to slap a hysterical passenger.   ;D
« Last Edit: April 08, 2014, 03:43:19 PM by veronaz »

Coley

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Re: How do you sympathize? Do you?
« Reply #20 on: April 08, 2014, 03:39:47 PM »
Sympathize? No. I wouldn't sympathize. This is not a personal loss. If I felt compelled to say something (and that's a big IF), I might say something empathetic like, "Tough day." And then I'd excuse myself quickly so as not to get sucked into the drama.

This person has gotten quite a bit of mileage out of her celebrity grief. If I were required to cover for her, I would need to know about payback for the coverage. As in, on what day this week will she be covering for me so I can recover my work time?

GSNW

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Re: How do you sympathize? Do you?
« Reply #21 on: April 08, 2014, 03:46:10 PM »

I'm not making excuses for her, because this is ridiculous, but does she have any family/friends? I only ask because perhaps she has no one in her life and she latches onto these random celebrities and thinks they have a real, emotional connection?


This is an insightful question because it's spot on.  She is single, and while she has many friends, her only family is clear across the country.  I would think that she would understand personal loss better because I know she lost both of her parents before the age of 30, which I can't imagine (I'm 33 and I definitely need my parents around!). 

She has told me before that the month of their deaths (they died the same month a few years apart) makes her sad, but there is no over the top stuff going on.  She's just a little subdued and most people might not even notice.

TootsNYC

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Re: How do you sympathize? Do you?
« Reply #22 on: April 08, 2014, 04:15:35 PM »
It may be that it's "safe" to be this emotional about these people, precisely because she doesn't know them.
   There may be something she gets from this that is not just "lots of attention."

But let's not armchair diagnose. Partly because it doesn't change how you respond. (though it might affect how much sympathy versus annoyance you feel)

sammycat

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Re: How do you sympathize? Do you?
« Reply #23 on: April 09, 2014, 12:52:48 AM »
She's attention seeking. I wouldn't give it to her.

She sounds incredibly annoying.

I know people who have lost real life family members and not carried on as much as this woman does for strangers.

Paper Roses

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Re: How do you sympathize? Do you?
« Reply #24 on: April 09, 2014, 01:15:17 AM »
Have any parents contacted the school to complain?  I can't imagine a teacher like that lasting long.  She's certainly not an adequate role model for them if she can't hold herself together over a celebrity - and that many of them?  That's just absurd.
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cicero

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Re: How do you sympathize? Do you?
« Reply #25 on: April 09, 2014, 02:52:49 AM »
and this is a teacher? wow. I'm sorry but this sounds way OTT. I never cried when a movie actor died. I was very deeply touched when former Prime Minister Rabin was murdered but I went to work the next day. I was sad when certain singers died - sad. as in "taking a moment of silence". not as in "can't work".

Maybe I'm cynical or mean but it wouldn't occur to me to say "sorry for your loss" (i would be thinking "it's not *your* loss!").

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Deetee

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Re: How do you sympathize? Do you?
« Reply #26 on: April 09, 2014, 03:32:38 AM »
You could tell you are busy filling out your pool.

https://www.dougstanhopescelebritydeathpool.com/

Then she would have something to look forward to when someone passes.

At the least it might stop her from bringing it up.

Sharnita

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Re: How do you sympathize? Do you?
« Reply #27 on: April 09, 2014, 06:33:12 AM »
7th graders love drama, her behavior is likely to be contagious. I certainly wouldn't validate it.

lowspark

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Re: How do you sympathize? Do you?
« Reply #28 on: April 09, 2014, 09:42:40 AM »
You could tell you are busy filling out your pool.

https://www.dougstanhopescelebritydeathpool.com/

Then she would have something to look forward to when someone passes.

At the least it might stop her from bringing it up.

Great site! Mickey Rooney's death cause made me laugh out loud.

ladyknight1

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Re: How do you sympathize? Do you?
« Reply #29 on: April 09, 2014, 09:57:01 AM »
I have a friend who is a major fangirl for many celebrities/music groups/sports players. She takes it too far, IMO, with weeks of posts about the loss, how she will remember them, etc. Yes, she has called out of work before because she was too upset.

I can't comprehend that level of emotional distress over a stranger. Mass disasters and tragedies get to me, but not the death of a celebrity.

I would never let it affect my professional life.

What can the administration do? And is a Nirvana t-shirt appropriate apparel for a middle school teacher?