Author Topic: International Etiquette - The Malawi 'verbal smackdown'  (Read 2836 times)

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Yvaine

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Re: International Etiquette - The Malawi 'verbal smackdown'
« Reply #15 on: April 17, 2014, 08:53:20 AM »
Would they rather Madonna not spend her money helping educate their children?  She doesn't have to do that.

The "President's" sister was an incompetent director for one of the school and so was fired.  Sounds like sour grapes.

I would file this under "no good deed goes unpunished."


True, but if you're doing charity for charity's sake, then expecting to be lauded and treated differently than others reflects very poorly on you.  In other words providing charity and then demanding kudos goes against everything that philanthropy stands for. 
I'm not saying that people shouldn't be recognized for their philanthropy, but demanding it as your due isn't right. 

Also, Madonna didn't have to travel to Malawi to find poor and disenfranchised children who need assistance.

I agree.  Giving really ought to be something someone does out of the goodness of their hearts, not because it will make them look good to others.   And maybe Madonna truly is doing it because she genuinely wants to help these people!  We really have no way of knowing her true intentions.

But giving does tend to ring truer when a person gives humbly and doesn't seek accolades and approval.  In fact it would seem all the more genuine if a giver wished to remain anonymous to the public, either giving it  in a way so no one at all knew the source of the donation or only giver and receiver knew the identity of the one giving the charity.   It seems to take away from the altruism of the giving when a person pounds their own chest about giving large sums to others.

On the other hand, sometimes a celebrity calling attention to an issue helps get it into the public eye and might get it more on other potential helpers' radar.

Piratelvr1121

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Re: International Etiquette - The Malawi 'verbal smackdown'
« Reply #16 on: April 17, 2014, 09:24:32 AM »
Well that's true.  Though I do think a matter of fact "I gave to this cause because I find it truly worthy", or something to that effect, would suffice, and wouldn't sound (at least to me) that anyone was expecting a ticker-tape parade for their charity. 
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

JoieGirl7

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Re: International Etiquette - The Malawi 'verbal smackdown'
« Reply #17 on: April 17, 2014, 02:57:44 PM »
Well that's true.  Though I do think a matter of fact "I gave to this cause because I find it truly worthy", or something to that effect, would suffice, and wouldn't sound (at least to me) that anyone was expecting a ticker-tape parade for their charity.

Why do you feel she is asking for that?

And how would it have been possible for someone like Madonna, who is so much in the public eye to uikd a bunch of schools in a third world conutry without anyone knowing about it.

I really don't think she is doing it for show.  It's easy enough to write a check and let others handle it and never out your feet on the ground.

Goosey

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Re: International Etiquette - The Malawi 'verbal smackdown'
« Reply #18 on: April 17, 2014, 03:02:23 PM »
Well, she was basically there to take pictures. It was definitely a publicity promotion. I'm not saying that's all bad, because it does highlight the need in the country. But, I do also doubt that she was there 100% out of the kindness of her own heart. And if she was, why would she care that the red carpet wasn't rolled out for her? Especially highlighted against what she was there to do (help ease the suffering of the less fortunate), complaining about not getting the VIP treatment seems petty.

JoieGirl7

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Re: International Etiquette - The Malawi 'verbal smackdown'
« Reply #19 on: April 17, 2014, 04:22:51 PM »
Well, she was basically there to take pictures. It was definitely a publicity promotion. I'm not saying that's all bad, because it does highlight the need in the country. But, I do also doubt that she was there 100% out of the kindness of her own heart. And if she was, why would she care that the red carpet wasn't rolled out for her? Especially highlighted against what she was there to do (help ease the suffering of the less fortunate), complaining about not getting the VIP treatment seems petty.

Seems to me the person doing the complaining is Banda.

Her sister getting fired from a cushy position at which she as ineffective seems the most likely motive for the temper tantrum.

Piratelvr1121

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Re: International Etiquette - The Malawi 'verbal smackdown'
« Reply #20 on: April 17, 2014, 04:33:12 PM »
Well that's true.  Though I do think a matter of fact "I gave to this cause because I find it truly worthy", or something to that effect, would suffice, and wouldn't sound (at least to me) that anyone was expecting a ticker-tape parade for their charity.

Why do you feel she is asking for that?

And how would it have been possible for someone like Madonna, who is so much in the public eye to uikd a bunch of schools in a third world conutry without anyone knowing about it.

I really don't think she is doing it for show.  It's easy enough to write a check and let others handle it and never out your feet on the ground.

Honestly? Bias.  Madonna has quite a reputation for thinking VERY highly of herself and doing a lot to stay in the limelight and keep public attention on herself that it's hard to trust her motives.  That she expected the red carpet treatment kind of emphasizes that.

Unfair, perhaps, but sometimes it is hard to look past a person's MO when that person has a history of wanting people to pay attention to her and wanting a bit of ego-stroking.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

JenJay

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Re: International Etiquette - The Malawi 'verbal smackdown'
« Reply #21 on: April 17, 2014, 07:17:06 PM »
I thought Madonna's note was very nice, it was much more humble than I expected. I don't see how taking a moment to hand-write a thank-you is "overly personal" and complaining about it makes the other side look silly.



Piratelvr1121

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Re: International Etiquette - The Malawi 'verbal smackdown'
« Reply #22 on: April 17, 2014, 09:19:52 PM »
That is kind of odd, as a handwritten note from a busy celebrity I imagine would be quite rare, as one would expect they'd typically get a PR person to send a printed note or form letter.

But I suspect it may be one of those things where, when you don't like a person everything they do annoys you.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata