Author Topic: How to respond to an evite when only half of the couple can attend?  (Read 943 times)

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gellchom

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I just received an evite to a casual bat mitzvah to be held in a park (both services and reception).  I don't object to the evite -- maybe years ago I would have, but honestly all I thought was that it was really cute and saved money and paper, and it seemed to fit with the nature of what they are planning. 

My question is how to respond properly.  I plan to attend, but my husband will be out of town.  The invitation came to my email account but was addressed to both of us.  When I clicked on the RSVP tab, it just gave me the option of accepting or declining for both of us.

I clicked "Accept" and used the comment space to explain the situation. 

I know I got the job done, assuming that they read the comment.  But I can envision a site that automatically tallies the responses and counts ours as 2 anyway, which would mess up the hosts.  (On this site, there was an option to correct the names, so I changed it to just mine, and maybe that will help, too, but anyway I haven't always seen that option.)

Can anyone think of the best way to respond in this situation?  This isn't the first time I've been faced with it, and I imagine it will only be increasingly common.  I hate to respond in a way that sort of seems to criticize or at least point out a flaw in their invitation.

Thanks in advance for your good ideas!

camlan

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Re: How to respond to an evite when only half of the couple can attend?
« Reply #1 on: April 17, 2014, 04:32:15 PM »
I think you did the best you could with what the site offered you.

If you still think there may be an issue, you can shoot off a short email along the lines of, "Not sure if this was clear on my RSVP, but DH will unfortunately not be able to attend."

Then I'd just forget about it. You will have done everything you possible could do to alert the hosts that only one of you will be attending.

People need to accept the consequences of their choices, and an RSVP system that doesn't allow for only some of the guests to accept is one such choice.
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says, “I’m possible!” –Audrey Hepburn


bah12

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Re: How to respond to an evite when only half of the couple can attend?
« Reply #2 on: April 17, 2014, 05:30:23 PM »
I believe that on evite when you are invited together with someone "Jack and Jill"...they are counted as one person.  When "bah and DH" are invited, I still have to "add guest" to get the count to be accurate.

 I think that explaining the situation in the comments is sufficient.

MurPl1

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Re: How to respond to an evite when only half of the couple can attend?
« Reply #3 on: April 19, 2014, 10:52:34 PM »
I rarely see evites anymore for events.  And I suspect it's partly due to issues like this - it's somewhat confusing to all parties.

SoCalVal

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Re: How to respond to an evite when only half of the couple can attend?
« Reply #4 on: April 20, 2014, 05:08:59 PM »
I think you did the best you could.  It would behoove the hosts to read the comments to get an accurate count.



lowspark

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Re: How to respond to an evite when only half of the couple can attend?
« Reply #5 on: April 21, 2014, 02:45:43 PM »
I agree, you did fine and they'll figure it out. The evites I've received always had a way to say how many, IIRC. Last evite I got was for a super bowl party and I remember specifying two people.

Anyway, I would bet on them reading the comments -- I read them as a guest so surely the host does. That's half the fun of using evites in my opinion! (I say this having never used evites to host a party because I vastly prefer paper ones in snail mail.)  8)