Updated: spoke with DH about it and he not only thinks we should send a card, but he also wants to sign it.
I'll be mailing it out to her today. Thanks for all the advice, all.
purple, the brothers' relationship is pretty volatile, so this is the way it has been for years.
I'm so glad! I believe she will appreciate your thoughtfulness.
And kudos to your DH for taking the high road in this situation.
This is a really positive mature update. I think you and your DH sound like compassionate people doing something nice.
Wish you all the best and hope there is no nasty motives assigned to you for doing something mature and considerate