Hi all! First time poster here
I was hoping to get some opinions on something that's been bothering me. I've recently encountered a very big dilemma that had plagued me for weeks. It's resolved now, but I would like to know if my actions about it were justifiable or was I in bad form for the decisions I made.
I've been working for a company since it opened office, more than five years ago. During my tenure, I had several promotions that granted me a status high up in the command chain, and because of these factors, I believe I became a valued member of the staff.
However, eventually I tendered my resignation due to circumstances unimportant to this story. We have a standard 45-day-notice policy which I complied with upon my resignation. However, for about 25 of those days, my resignation had been unattended to because my boss was in and out of the country, tending to a sudden severe illness (we had to wait for him to give a go-signal on whether or not my resignation would be accepted, as I was perfectly willing to stay if they were willing to make an offer to keep me (To be clear, my resignation was NOT a ploy for an income boost--I was willing to stay even if they changed nothing. Resigning was just something I was on the fence about wanting to do)). When he was well enough to return, he decided to accept my resignation, but my last day was coming up MUCH too soon to find and train a replacement, etc. So they asked me to extend for a month more.
The thing about that extension was that it would not only make me work on the busiest month of the year (December, right about Christmastime to be specific), but I would have to train my replacement, too. On top of that, for the past few months, I had been dealing with personal matters that were frankly nothing short of emotionally painful and draining AND I had no prospects yet for a new job (which is frightening for me because I am a mother of two).
To be honest, leaving at the end of my notice would have been better for me (difficult financially, but preferable to allow me to work on my personal issues), but I did love my job and the people I worked with so, as a gesture of good will, I agreed to extend, but with a condition: if they wanted me to extend, they would extend me until the end February or I won't agree to the extension at all. (I did love what I did, but I certainly wasn't going to allow them to use me for THEIR convenience just because they hadn't prepared for my resignation properly. Plus the Jan-Feb extension would allow me ample time to save up, pay off my company loans, and look for a replacement job.)
So they agreed, and things worked out okay for December and January. But with February coming up, I started searching for a replacement job (I expected to be looking for a good month or two with the job market as bad as it is). Long story short, after a while, I stumble upon the perfect replacement (JUST that job, and no other from the good twenty that I applied for).
Now, herein lies the dilemma: the new job wants me to start first week of February. I tell them I can't do that and manage to negotiate to start third week of February. Of course, when I told my current company, they predictably kicked up a huge fuss about it, particularly because it was myself who said I should stay until the end of February (And I get that. I do. But my thought process was: I should prioritize my job security and, consequently, my family's future over giving this company, who no longer values me as an employee anyway, two additional weeks of convenience).
Anyway, it's all been resolved now, but I would like an honest opinion about my actions: should I have honored my word with my old job to the letter (this meant turning down the only job offer I received so far (and it's a REALLY good job)) or were my decisions justifiable?