Wedding Bliss and Blues > Paper Trail

Got a "Send Out Cards" thank you note

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gellchom:
... And I am really put off by it. 

Maybe some of you already know about this, but I didn't. 

We got a letter today in a printed (address, return address, and even the postage, with the cancellation including a plug for the company) envelope. 

The card inside was completely printed, even the signature.  On the back was more advertising for the company.  I can't tell whether the couple even wrote the text; it looks like it could have been an auto-generated text where they customize a few fields.  It was obviously never touched by the couple themselves.  I googled the company for just a minute before finding out that that's exactly what it is (and an MLM business at that): they print, stuff, and mail greeting cards and such.

(Side issue: I cracked up, as I always do, at their thanking me for "the beautiful stemware ... [Groom] and I absolutely love the crystal wine glasses ..." that I chose from the registry.  I recognize that makes it harder to effuse about a gift, but, sheesh, surely there's a way to be enthusiastic other than by complimenting your own good taste.)

Anyway, I think this is another terrible idea that marketers assure couples is The Perfect Way to thank your guests efficiently, or something.  And maybe there are people who don't think it looks so bad, and it isn't a big deal, of course -- it was still a prompt (very prompt, in fact) thank you for the gift, which is the point, after all. 

Maybe this kind of thing would be okay for something like Xmas cards from a business.  But for personal correspondence, including thank you notes?  To me, it looked absolutely awful.  It screams, "Look!  We found a way to spend as little time and trouble as possible thinking about you and expressing gratitude!"  Even an email would have been more personal -- it would have come from them, at least, and without all the advertising. 

I'm not posting to bash this couple, just to warn anyone considering doing this to be aware that no matter what you yourself may think of it, at least some of your guests will have this reaction, too, so if you want to avoid that, just write your own notes.

greencat:
Thank you notes should be handwritten, but a thank you note is better than no thank you note at all.

gellchom:
Greencat, pardon me, but I don't understand the point of your post.  Perhaps you missed the part where I explicitly acknowledged, "it was still a prompt (very prompt, in fact) thank you for the gift, which is the point, after all."

(This kind of reminds me of another string going on right now, "I knew you were going to say that." I absolutely knew that there would be a response to my post saying something like "what's important is that you were thanked.")

No one is disputing that.  But it isn't the point.  Not thanking people at all isn't even an option for anyone even remotely mannerly.

The point here was criticism of outsourcing thank you notes to a company (in a way that entails minimal personal involvement) rather than writing and sending them yourself. 

(My husband just walked in and said, "Did you see that thank you note from Bride?  Did they even write that?")

greencat:
I was, in large part, agreeing with you.  Anything short of at handwritten thank-yous are a bit tacky, although the example you received with the advertising is egregiously tacky.  I wonder if the couple knew that the notes were going to include all the ads?

gellchom:
I see.  It's even worse than that it was not hand written (or even signed) and included ads.  To me, the worst part is that the couple outsourced the whole thing.  All they did was fill in a few fields.  They never even touched or even saw it.

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