Author Topic: Noisy Neighbors  (Read 4536 times)

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Laurel

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Noisy Neighbors
« on: June 04, 2014, 01:45:02 PM »
This is not an enormous problem, however it is something that I would like to address at some point.

Our neighborhood was built in the 70s, does not have any CCRs, and is primarily middle class folk, in the late 20's to 40's age range, but not many kids running around.  We bought our house 5 years ago, and have put a lot of effort into renovating the inside and making it look pretty nice from the front. Uphill Neighbors bought their house about 3 years ago. Uphill Neighbors are 30 something triplet men who own the house together.  We have always been cordial, but not particularly friendly.  When they cut down a huge tree near the lot line, they asked if we minded beforehand.  When we tore out some huge junipers and relandscaped, I asked if they minded if I planted a few small bushes and perennials on the 4 foot strip between their driveway and our lot line.  They were happy to have someone take over landscaping the area that had previously just been juniper overgrowth.  So we are on fine terms.  I have a veggie garden in our back yard, and I've given them kale, zucchini, peas, tomatoes and flowers from the garden in the past.

They almost always have 5-7 cars in their driveway, what with the 3 brothers, plus girlfriends and buddies staying over all the time.  They also pretty regularly have gatherings.  While I wouldn't call them parties (it's not as though lots more people are showing up), they get together in the back yard and play lawn games, have fires, etc.  Their primary lawn game is something called "corn hole" where you throw bean bags at a sheet of plywood with holes cut in it, trying to get them through.  It's noisy.  Accompanying the constant thuds of bean bags hitting plywood, you also get loud, drunk-sounding "WOOOOOOHHHH!!!!s" pretty regularly.  These tournaments go on for 3-7 hours usually, well into the night.  If this was happening once or twice a year, I totally understand, but it is happening at least a couple times a month, sometimes mid-week, and usually lasting past midnight.  Additionally, someone there invariably brings a dog that barks at ours through the fence (our dogs are not barkers, but get agitated when dogs are yapping at them) and also barks randomly throughout the evening. This makes it so we cannot let our dogs out into the yard if we are not out there supervising them, and the dogs spend most of the time they're inside being agitated due to the on and off barking.  Our bedroom is also right next to the neighbor's back yard, so we are unable to go to bed (at a normal hour) with our windows open on hot summer nights, because their yelling is so loud.

The neighbors on the other side of us can hear them and have asked us if we know what the heck is going on with them, and last weekend during one of their gatherings, the neighbor behind us (kittycorner to their back yard) was giving them the stinkeye from his bedroom window. 

We kind of hoped that they would default on the home, or move, but none of that has happened, and since we intend to stay in our house for the foreseeable future, I would love to come up with a way to nicely tell them to (Oo, I just used a rude phrase that the moderators won't be happy about. ) without coming off as the grumpy neighbor who hates fun (we also occasionally have barbecues, but they're always on weekends, infrequent, and much quieter), and starting a war with them.  They seem reasonable, but the last thing I'm interested in is bringing out their inner crazy.

bah12

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Re: Noisy Neighbors
« Reply #1 on: June 04, 2014, 02:00:06 PM »
Are your houses so close together that you can see someone giving them stinkeye from inside their house?

So, a few things....when you live in close proximity to other people, I do think you need to be a bit more vigelent that others are around and be more respectful to the noise you make, how your space looks, etc.  At the same time, if you live in close proximity to other people, I think you need to be aware that you will likely hear your neighbors at some point.

I think that there's reasonable compromise here.  Where I don't think you can ask them to reduce the frequency of their parties, I do think it's reasonable to ask them to not play loud games or yell after 10pm on the weekends and maybe a little earlier (like 9pm) on weekdays.  Just approach them calmly the next time you see them outside and let them know that the noise, late at night, is bothersome.  Kindly ask them to keep it down and wait to see if they do.  (No point in continuing to let the irritation build to the point it becomes a bigger deal than it needs to be).

I don't think you should say anything about the cars.  They are in their driveway and on their property, so nothing wrong there.

And again, I'm not sure what the use is in hoping that a problem will just disappear.  Defaulting on their home hurts your property value, so I'm not sure why that's a good scenario for you.  And waiting for them to decide to move seems fruitless when you can simply just talk to them. Plus you don't know who your next neighbors will be.

You already seem to have a friendly relationship with the brothers, so be proactive, bring the noise to their attention nicely and start out with the assumption that once you talk about it, they'll be more considerate.  It may just be them not realizing how much they disturb the neighbors.

BeagleMommy

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Re: Noisy Neighbors
« Reply #2 on: June 04, 2014, 02:04:00 PM »
I would start by simply asking them.  Something like "Hey, Dudes, you may not be aware of this, but the walls of these old houses are pretty thin.  We can hear everything going on in your backyard and the last party got pretty noisy.  We'd appreciate it if you could keep the noise to a minimum.".  If they don't comply you can always call the police to make a noise complaint.

Cali.in.UK

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Re: Noisy Neighbors
« Reply #3 on: June 04, 2014, 02:07:34 PM »
You sound like a great neighbor to have - I wish I had neighbors that shared their home grown kale! Well it's good that you both seem to have a cordial relationship so far, and since they asked you already about cutting down the tree, it seems like they are hopeful to keep the peace as well.
Maybe you could try to catch one of them (not when they are drinking with friends over) and just mention something like, "Hey neighbor, how are you? I just wanted to mention the weeknight noise that you might not be aware of. When you guys are out in your backyard, the noise carries over quite distinctly and on weeknights it makes it pretty difficult to sleep. If you guys could try to end the backyard games at (x time) on week nights we would really appreciate it."
And you could even bring some more veggies with you if you think it would ease any possible tension?
Also, side question: are there any noise ordinances in your neighborhood?

Laurel

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Re: Noisy Neighbors
« Reply #4 on: June 04, 2014, 02:11:44 PM »
Are your houses so close together that you can see someone giving them stinkeye from inside their house?

So, a few things....when you live in close proximity to other people, I do think you need to be a bit more vigelent that others are around and be more respectful to the noise you make, how your space looks, etc.  At the same time, if you live in close proximity to other people, I think you need to be aware that you will likely hear your neighbors at some point.


The houses are on 1/4 acre lots, so we are fairly close.  The neighbor behind us's bedroom window (DH and I have deemed him "creepy neighbor" because he always peeks out of his bedroom window) is just easily visible from our yard (we have planted trees that should start screening the view soon), so DH said that he saw him glaring.

I totally expect to hear normal noise from neighbors.  That's people living.  Marathon lawn games on a regular basis are obnoxious, but the yelling is so over the top, and I'm not sure where a dog barking regularly is considered acceptable neighborly behavior.  Sure, occasional barking makes sense, but just leaving your dog outside when it's obviously making lots of noise?

Laurel

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Re: Noisy Neighbors
« Reply #5 on: June 04, 2014, 02:13:48 PM »
I would start by simply asking them.  Something like "Hey, Dudes, you may not be aware of this, but the walls of these old houses are pretty thin.  We can hear everything going on in your backyard and the last party got pretty noisy.  We'd appreciate it if you could keep the noise to a minimum.".  If they don't comply you can always call the police to make a noise complaint.

I have considered calling the police.  My biggest concern is asking them to stop making noise, having them ignore me, and then calling the police and having them know it was me, and then becoming a target for whatever in the future.

Mister E

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Re: Noisy Neighbors
« Reply #6 on: June 04, 2014, 02:16:04 PM »
Ask them politely to please keep the noise down. If that doesn't work then call the police (every single time they're noisy and it's late) and let them deal with it. That's what I'd do anyways.

Ed.

TootsNYC

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Re: Noisy Neighbors
« Reply #7 on: June 04, 2014, 02:19:07 PM »
Oooh, how about this?

Call the police. Arrange to be around where you can witness the cops arriving. When the cops leave, go over and ask what was up.
    When they tell you someone called in a noise complaint, say, "Wow, they called the cops? Well, I guess you guys can get pretty loud. And a party now and then is easy to overlook, but if there are lots of loud parties, people run out of patience. I've wondered if I could say something, myself.  Well, anyway, thanks for letting me know what was up. I hope you guys can enjoy the rest of the party." And stroll home.

bah12

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Re: Noisy Neighbors
« Reply #8 on: June 04, 2014, 02:21:07 PM »
I would start by simply asking them.  Something like "Hey, Dudes, you may not be aware of this, but the walls of these old houses are pretty thin.  We can hear everything going on in your backyard and the last party got pretty noisy.  We'd appreciate it if you could keep the noise to a minimum.".  If they don't comply you can always call the police to make a noise complaint.

I have considered calling the police.  My biggest concern is asking them to stop making noise, having them ignore me, and then calling the police and having them know it was me, and then becoming a target for whatever in the future.

You're projecting way too much.  Why are you so sure that they'll ignore you?  Especially when you haven't yet tried to talk to them?  They were considerate about the tree and aside from the backyard noise/games, seem to be pretty friendly overall.  Don't be afraid to confront them.  That's the easiest and most appropriate solution at this point.

Calling the police first is jumping the gun.  And being afraid of talking to them, because they might ignore you and retaliate, seems like too much considering the background you gave. 

bah12

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Re: Noisy Neighbors
« Reply #9 on: June 04, 2014, 02:22:09 PM »
Oooh, how about this?

Call the police. Arrange to be around where you can witness the cops arriving. When the cops leave, go over and ask what was up.
    When they tell you someone called in a noise complaint, say, "Wow, they called the cops? Well, I guess you guys can get pretty loud. And a party now and then is easy to overlook, but if there are lots of loud parties, people run out of patience. I've wondered if I could say something, myself.  Well, anyway, thanks for letting me know what was up. I hope you guys can enjoy the rest of the party." And stroll home.

You're kidding right?

Mister E

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Re: Noisy Neighbors
« Reply #10 on: June 04, 2014, 02:22:16 PM »
OK I totally understand your concern. But if you have to call the cops and the neighbors choose to be jerks about it and decide to "target" you somehow I'd call the police then too assuming it's illegal behavior. That's what the police are there for. I wouldn't let them intimidate me no matter what.

Ed.

Mister E

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Re: Noisy Neighbors
« Reply #11 on: June 04, 2014, 02:27:48 PM »
The thing is you don't know they'll be unreasonable until you ask.

Ed.

veronaz

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Re: Noisy Neighbors
« Reply #12 on: June 04, 2014, 02:28:37 PM »
Quote
does not have any CCRs,
???

CCRs.....?   What does that mean?
« Last Edit: June 04, 2014, 02:31:01 PM by veronaz »

Perfect Circle

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Re: Noisy Neighbors
« Reply #13 on: June 04, 2014, 02:33:42 PM »
Oooh, how about this?

Call the police. Arrange to be around where you can witness the cops arriving. When the cops leave, go over and ask what was up.
    When they tell you someone called in a noise complaint, say, "Wow, they called the cops? Well, I guess you guys can get pretty loud. And a party now and then is easy to overlook, but if there are lots of loud parties, people run out of patience. I've wondered if I could say something, myself.  Well, anyway, thanks for letting me know what was up. I hope you guys can enjoy the rest of the party." And stroll home.

I really wouldn't do that. That's incredibly PA way of doing and wasting police time. I would talk to the neighbours nicely. You never know, they might be perfectly reasonable.
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veronaz

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Re: Noisy Neighbors
« Reply #14 on: June 04, 2014, 02:37:09 PM »
Oooh, how about this?

Call the police. Arrange to be around where you can witness the cops arriving. When the cops leave, go over and ask what was up.
    When they tell you someone called in a noise complaint, say, "Wow, they called the cops? Well, I guess you guys can get pretty loud. And a party now and then is easy to overlook, but if there are lots of loud parties, people run out of patience. I've wondered if I could say something, myself.  Well, anyway, thanks for letting me know what was up. I hope you guys can enjoy the rest of the party." And stroll home.

I really wouldn't do that. That's incredibly PA way of doing and wasting police time. I would talk to the neighbours nicely. You never know, they might be perfectly reasonable.

POD.   (bolded)  I was thinking cowardly and childish.

Talk to them, face to face.