Another parking question: What would Ehell do?

[perpetua]

The parking threads have got me thinking about a situation I used to run into many years ago.

Back in a past life - so this is no longer an active issue, just presented for discussion - my ex and I used to go out car-booting on a Sunday morning and on the way we would stop at our local McDonald's to grab some breakfast to take away.  This particular branch was in the town centre (ie, not a drive through or even with its own parking). Parking was extremely limited, since it was on a small and narrow street, and there were perhaps 5 or 6 bays in the whole street and we'd often have to drive around the block a few times before we got a space. Around the corner, not far away at all but far enough that you wouldn't want to walk it with two hands' full of Maccy D's and a drinks tray, was a street with completely unlimited parking which was always empty.

I used to insist that once we'd been in and grabbed what we needed, we moved the car to the other street to eat it, so that other people who wanted to run in could have the space.

He, on the other hand, liked to sit in the space we were already in and eat rather than move the car maybe a hundred feet around the corner which took literally ten or fifteen seconds. His rationale was that he wasn't doing anything wrong and the space was now his to use as he pleased for however long he pleased. Mine was that just because you can do something, doesn't mean you should; I thought this was really inconsiderate, especially considering that ten minutes before we'd been driving around waiting for a space to open up so *we* could park and run in, and wouldn't it be nice not to put other people through that?

We rowed about it pretty much every week (because by that time we were at the stage of butting heads just because we could).

What would EHell do in this situation?

[knitwicca]

Why not drop the passenger off to order and get the food while the driver circled around? Then find a quiet place to park and eat?

[veryfluffy]

I probably would have parked the car in the other street to start off with, then eaten my food in the restaurant.

[I'mnotinsane]

Was he driving?  If so, you should have driven and then you could have moved it without discussion.

[perpetua]

Was he driving?  If so, you should have driven and then you could have moved it without discussion.

Not all the time, no. In any case, it was our car, we jointly owned it, and I don't subscribe to the 'driver always calls the shots' theory.

Why not drop the passenger off to order and get the food while the driver circled around? Then find a quiet place to park and eat?

We did that sometimes if we couldn't find a space. But this discussion always related to when we *could* find a space.

I thought it was very inconsiderate to sit there taking up a space that someone else clearly needed, when we could have moved the car literally a couple of hundred feet around the corner before we started eating.

[m2kbug]

I think this can go either way.  If you stayed in the restaurant to eat, it would have been the same thing, a car taking up a much coveted spot.  I'm in the same boat as you, however, that I think I would have preferred to move to the other parking lot and left the space for someone else.  I don't think your husband was wrong, though.  Unless there are signs noting that these spots are for picking up only with a time limit, you are fine to stay there as long as you need. 

[perpetua]

I think this can go either way.  If you stayed in the restaurant to eat, it would have been the same thing, a car taking up a much coveted spot.  I'm in the same boat as you, however, that I think I would have preferred to move to the other parking lot and left the space for someone else.  I don't think your husband was wrong, though.  Unless there are signs noting that these spots are for picking up only with a time limit, you are fine to stay there as long as you need.

Oh yeah, technically we would be within our rights to park there and eat. I just think it's really inconsiderate when there's another option available and there are people driving around waiting for spots.

[kherbert05]

I would have parked on the the other street and eaten in the restaurant or just done the walk. But I'll park at the Zoo spend the morning there, then walk all over Herman Park and the Museum District.

[shhh its me]

   I don't think its rude.  I might  say  inconsiderate but I would definitely say unkind..

[JenJay]

I probably would have wanted to move just because it's more pleasant to sit and eat in a quiet, empty lot rather than a busy curb with people coming and going. I do agree that it was very considerate of you to suggest moving to eat, however, I agree with him that it's appropriate to stay in the spot as long as you're eating and still a customer of the place the spots are for. I think this is a case of "what we should do" versus "what we have to do", where one way may be better but that doesn't make the other way wrong.

[perpetua]

I do agree that it was very considerate of you to suggest moving to eat, however, I agree with him that it's appropriate to stay in the spot as long as you're eating and still a customer of the place the spots are for.

Just a slight misunderstanding there: This wasn't a 'parking lot' for McDonald's and the spaces aren't for customers of McDonalds. The McDonald's was on a street in the centre of town and they were parking spaces on the street. It's not a McDonald's 'lot', like you get in America, or a 'strip  mall' with a McDonalds on it with its own parking spaces. That's why I thought it was inconsiderate. The spaces aren't for customers of McDonalds. They're parking spaces in the street that the McDonalds happens to be on and they were *very* limited.

[JenJay]

I do agree that it was very considerate of you to suggest moving to eat, however, I agree with him that it's appropriate to stay in the spot as long as you're eating and still a customer of the place the spots are for.

Just a slight misunderstanding there: This wasn't a 'parking lot' for McDonald's and the spaces aren't for customers of McDonalds. The McDonald's was on a street in the centre of town and they were parking spaces on the street. It's not a McDonald's 'lot', like you get in America, or a 'strip  mall' with a McDonalds on it with its own parking spaces. That's why I thought it was inconsiderate. The spaces aren't for customers of McDonalds. They're parking spaces in the street that the McDonalds happens to be on and they were *very* limited.

Often times here you'll see signs "For X customers only 8a-6p" (or whatever time) and I thought that's what you were in. I can see where it would be frustrating for the other businesses and their customers to have McD's customers sitting in the spots for 30+ minutes a pop, especially if they were just sitting and eating in the car.

I think that does tip it for me, since it would be so easy to move to the empty lot and doing so would be such a considerate gesture for the other people hoping to park, I do think I would expect us to do so and I would be annoyed if the person with me refused just because "I don't have to".

It might not be technically rude, but I know I'd feel incredibly rude and uncomfortable sitting in one of the limited spots for any longer than I needed to, and I wouldn't consider eating a "need" since it would be so easy to eat elsewhere. I could see sticking around if it would be a long enough drive to another spot that my food had cooled, the ice in my drink was melting, etc., but that's not the case here. I vote with you. 

[perpetua]

Exactly, plus actually I think that sums up why I didn't like it. We were no longer customers the second we left the premises with the food. If we were in there eating, that's different; we're still customers. But for a takeaway, you're only a customer for the time it takes you to get your food, not to eat it.

(I still think the set up is being misunderstood a bit though; the other businesses don't own the spaces any more than McDonald's does. It's a street with lots of shops on it and a few parking bays along the street, not a mall/business car park. The spots aren't 'for the businesses')

ETA:

Here it is

It's just a town centre street, see the McD's on the left there. Where the lorry is parked, maybe 2 or 3 cars can get in there. There is another bay a bit further up the street with a similar amount of spaces. The double yellow lines on the rest of the road mean 'no parking'.  What the ex wanted to do, once we'd gone in and got our food and come back out, was sit in the car in that space where the lorry is until we'd finished our food, while other people circled around the block unable to park.

[JenJay]

Exactly, plus actually I think that sums up why I didn't like it. We were no longer customers the second we left the premises with the food. If we were in there eating, that's different; we're still customers. But for a takeaway, you're only a customer for the time it takes you to get your food, not to eat it.

(I still think the set up is being misunderstood a bit though; the other businesses don't own the spaces any more than McDonald's does. It's a street with lots of shops on it and a few parking bays along the street, not a mall/business car park. The spots aren't 'for the businesses')

No, I understood what you meant. Anyone is free to use any of the spots for whatever reason. I only meant that, with parking on that street being so limited, it would be especially annoying for the owners and customers of the other businesses on that block to have someone sitting in one of the few spots, eating. Probably less annoying for someone who just wanted to get out and walk around, as the could more easily park anywhere within 1/4 mile or whatever distance they're comfortable walking.

It reminds me of the debate over whether or not it's okay to park right in front of a gas pump, get some gas, and then leave your car and go into the convenience store to buy some snacks or use the restroom. Granted you were pumping gas, so had a legit reason to be in that spot to begin with, and technically you're still a customer of the business in general, but if there are only X number of spots for pumping gas, and other spots nearby for people to use for whatever reason, I think it's incredibly rude to leave your car taking up a gas spot while other people just sit and wait for you to leave. Same as the situation you describe, if someone just wants to be in the area in general and can park anywhere (as you two were while eating), it seems rude to take up one of the few spots that people who want to do immediate business right there are waiting for, even though the spots are for anyone. Does that make more sense?

[perpetua]

Yeah, that makes total sense.

I'm really unsure about the petrol station example. It is a similar thing but something always stops me pulling away from the pump in case they think I'm trying to drive off without paying or something (here, you go into the shop to pay *after* you've pumped the petrol. There are some places that you pay by card at the pump but it's not usual). Plus I'm not sure if anyone else can start pumping until you've paid for it and it's 'cleared' anyway.