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Author Topic: Gift wish-list for the in laws.  (Read 4528 times)

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Carotte

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Gift wish-list for the in laws.
« on: December 01, 2014, 05:37:53 PM »
So, my SO's sister sent me a mail asking a few things about Christmas one of them being, do I have a wish-list for Christmas ?, since she's Santa secretary and all (secretary to her parents really).
I hadn't thought about it, I've been with my SO for 2 1/2 years, both christmases were apart, each in our families, this year we're seing both (and hosting his side) and gifts have never come up until now.
I have no idea what price range they're looking at for this and don't really have a wish list - SO gave me mine a month ago, my mom took me on an ikea field trip last week -

Is my best bet creating a quick pinterest board with things in multiple price-range? That way they'll either get me a specific thing if they agree with it or at least get a good idea of what I like? 

LadyL

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Re: Gift wish-list for the in laws.
« Reply #1 on: December 01, 2014, 05:46:34 PM »
Yep, I'd provide some sort of list or link with a few gifts around $20, $40-50, $75, and maybe one $100 gift.

MommyPenguin

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Re: Gift wish-list for the in laws.
« Reply #2 on: December 01, 2014, 06:26:22 PM »
That makes sense to me.  Or you could also make an Amazon wishlist, because Amazon lets you add items from other sites, and you can mark off an item as bought even if you didn't buy it through Amazon.

Maybe it's just my family, but we have a lower price range than what LadyL mentioned, so I'd try to have several gifts under $20, maybe more like $10, if that's an option.  Books or DVDs are usually good at that level.
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Alicia

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Re: Gift wish-list for the in laws.
« Reply #3 on: December 01, 2014, 06:55:45 PM »
Why not ask your so?

Carotte

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Re: Gift wish-list for the in laws.
« Reply #4 on: December 01, 2014, 07:13:23 PM »
Why not ask your so?
I'll try to get hold of him to see what he thinks but I don't think he'll be any help...
I don't know if he ever was in a situation like that and looking at his siblings wont help, the sister is now maried with her high school sweetheart so whatever they did for now-husband back then won't have anything to do with 2 years girlfriend- civil partnership.. partner.
I'll have to actually find things I might want and that will be the hardest  :P, I'm not used to that!
And a something for them too.

Carotte

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Re: Gift wish-list for the in laws.
« Reply #5 on: December 01, 2014, 07:18:20 PM »

Maybe it's just my family, but we have a lower price range than what LadyL mentioned, so I'd try to have several gifts under $20, maybe more like $10, if that's an option.  Books or DVDs are usually good at that level.

Ah yeah, I was going for this kind of price range too. I know what they gift their son and it's clearly way above my family medium, but i'm seing this more like a token gift anyway, we're hosting them after all so it would be weird to show up without anything I guess.

TootsNYC

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Re: Gift wish-list for the in laws.
« Reply #6 on: December 01, 2014, 07:32:03 PM »
2 years, and you and SO are living together? It wouldn't surprise me if they gave you a present much on the lines of what they gave their son-in-law.

So I'd put a variety of price points.

purple

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Re: Gift wish-list for the in laws.
« Reply #7 on: December 01, 2014, 07:33:37 PM »
I know how awkward you must feel.

This is the 9th Christmas where I've been with my husband and every year since the very first his relatives have asked me what I would like to receive from them as a Christmas gift.  This sort of thing was never done in my family (no gifts were given at all, actually).  Add to this that I'm one who doesn't like wish-lists, registries and the like, and add also the whole 'how much do they want to spend' and the awkwardness factor was through the roof!

For the very first time this year, I found a way to respond that makes them happy and me happy.  This is what I did.  I didn't ask for anything specific.  I just said, 'well at the moment I'm really into perfume, baking and cat-chasing and racing boats' and I left it at that.  So, they're happy because they have some ideas to think about and I'm happy because I didn't have to actually ask for something specific (which I just think is rude and I can't get past it).  Also, no money is mentioned at all so they can get something for however much they want to spend.

KenveeB

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Re: Gift wish-list for the in laws.
« Reply #8 on: December 01, 2014, 07:43:40 PM »
I keep an Amazon.com wishlist at all times. I use it when I want to buy a quick treat for myself during the year, and I can share it with my mom and anyone else who asks at my birthday and Christmas. I'd put one together real quick with a wide range of prices and send SIL the link. It won't look like you're asking for "this one thing in particular from them", but "here's stuff I'm interested in."

Tea Drinker

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Re: Gift wish-list for the in laws.
« Reply #9 on: December 01, 2014, 09:44:05 PM »
You could also just tell them that no, you don't have a wishlist, but you really like chocolate, or that you don't have a specific wishlist, but if they want to buy something for both of you, kitchenware in white, blue, or stainless steel would be good. That's a made-up example based on your mention of the Ikea expedition.
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Chipmunky

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Re: Gift wish-list for the in laws.
« Reply #10 on: December 02, 2014, 09:38:50 AM »
My mother asked for lists from DH and I. As predicted, with regards to DH's list (we both have amazon wish lists), she's asking me to tell her which items he wants most, order them to be sent to her house, and she'll write a check for me (same with stuff for grandma, aunt and uncle, and nieces).

In Laws (before they were in laws) used to ask for gift lists. As did BIL and almost SIL. We also got lists from BIL and SIL. We'd pick out a few items from the lists, but I'm crafty and made SIL a scarf in her favorite football team colors last year (she loved it, along with the crystal we'd gotten them as a Christmas/engagement gift). FIL is always hard to shop for. SMIL likes crafty gifts, and aside from that, prefers a donation to the animal shelter in her honor.

FIL and SMIL never paid attention to the lists we provided at their request. After the effort I put in last year (hand knitted scarf for SMIL, painting I did of their dogs, homemade fudge for FIL, hand painted ornaments), only to receive obvious last minute, no thought gifts (DH got a bottle of salad dressing, I'm not kidding), I'm done with putting in a lot of time and effort into handmade gifts for them.

tinkytinky

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Re: Gift wish-list for the in laws.
« Reply #11 on: December 02, 2014, 10:07:36 AM »
Do you have anything that you collect or a hobby? for instance, if you like a certain ball team, tell them that. That gives them an idea for items, not a price. You can get anything from stocking caps to leather coats to autographed balls, etc. so they can pick their own price, while getting you something that you can treasure. If you have a hobby like knitting, they can get you anything from needles and yarn with pattern books to carrying cases etc.

Give them the general idea, as opposed to the specific thing. Make it simple.

EllenS

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Re: Gift wish-list for the in laws.
« Reply #12 on: December 02, 2014, 10:12:01 AM »
I know how awkward you must feel.

This is the 9th Christmas where I've been with my husband and every year since the very first his relatives have asked me what I would like to receive from them as a Christmas gift.  This sort of thing was never done in my family (no gifts were given at all, actually).  Add to this that I'm one who doesn't like wish-lists, registries and the like, and add also the whole 'how much do they want to spend' and the awkwardness factor was through the roof!

For the very first time this year, I found a way to respond that makes them happy and me happy.  This is what I did.  I didn't ask for anything specific.  I just said, 'well at the moment I'm really into perfume, baking and cat-chasing and racing boats' and I left it at that.  So, they're happy because they have some ideas to think about and I'm happy because I didn't have to actually ask for something specific (which I just think is rude and I can't get past it).  Also, no money is mentioned at all so they can get something for however much they want to spend.

I think this is a really gracious way to handle it. Because, ultimately, good gift-giving is about knowing the person. It's very easy for family, especially in-laws, to only know you in one context - family events - and not have a good feel for what you're like or what you enjoy independently.

TootsNYC

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Re: Gift wish-list for the in laws.
« Reply #13 on: December 02, 2014, 10:25:32 AM »
There's also a middle ground between the "this item exactly" and "this category":

Something like, "I like 3/4-sleeve dressy T-shirts for work, and I like stripes or solids. I wear a large/medium/whatever. XYZ brand fits me well."

"I'm always on the lookout for a new gourmet taste treat, of something I can use to jazz up dinner, like chutneys or sauces or spice mixes. I do/don't like spicy stuff."

So, sort of specific, but leaves them lots of room to feel that they've added some of their own personality to it. And being that general leaves them open to go buy from Target or Saks, whichever they want.

TootsNYC

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Re: Gift wish-list for the in laws.
« Reply #14 on: December 02, 2014, 10:26:15 AM »
Oh, and...the one thing about aiming low in terms of price point: they can always buy more than one present if they were intending to spend more.