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Author Topic: Why did I say yes? Now I'm a nervous wreck! Update! Wedding was yesterday!  (Read 11380 times)

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Alicia

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Re: Why did I say yes? Now I'm a nervous wreck!
« Reply #15 on: February 09, 2015, 11:49:00 AM »
As part of my work i do about  five wedding  a year. My tricks.
1. On my peice of paper with the wording the couple wants  i put smiles every line or two to remind me to pause and smile. This relaxes me and makes the whole thing look better.
2.I practice several times in full outfit. Particularly focused on name pronounced correctly. I have couples  record for me how theye say their names  so i get it right.
3.I like to focus on the ties or earrings  of the couple. That way close to face but not face and makes me less nervous. 
4. I remember that after i do this i get cake.

TootsNYC

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Re: Why did I say yes? Now I'm a nervous wreck!
« Reply #16 on: February 09, 2015, 12:56:46 PM »
Also, 50 to 75 people isn't really as many people as you might think. It's just a couple of families; think of it that way, maybe.

SamiHami

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Re: Why did I say yes? Now I'm a nervous wreck!
« Reply #17 on: February 09, 2015, 01:05:27 PM »
Such wonderful suggestions! Thank you all so much. I'll be meeting with the bride soon to go over the vows so I'll be able to get a good head start on rehearsing.

You all are so supportive and I appreciate that.  :)

What have you got? Is it food? Is it for me? I want it whatever it is!

JoW

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Re: Why did I say yes? Now I'm a nervous wreck!
« Reply #18 on: April 22, 2015, 12:41:55 PM »
At age 50 you probably wear glasses for reading.  Leave the bifocals in your car.  Wear just your reading glasses.  That way the whole audience will be out of focus for you and that will make them easier to ignore. 

I'm speaking from experience.  My first public speaking engagement was a high school awards ceremony.  The audience was 300 parents and grandparents, all waiting for the only part they considered important - the part where their kid got an award.     I'm near-sighted.  I took my glasses off to read the speech and didn't see the audience. 

SamiHami

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Re: Why did I say yes? Now I'm a nervous wreck!
« Reply #19 on: April 22, 2015, 01:08:05 PM »
That's an idea! I usually wear contacts but recently got glasses-my first pair of bifocals. Maybe I should do just what you said and take some readers with me. It's coming up pretty soon. I'm looking forward to it and dreading it all at once. :)

What have you got? Is it food? Is it for me? I want it whatever it is!

Wintergreen

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Re: Why did I say yes? Now I'm a nervous wreck!
« Reply #20 on: April 23, 2015, 05:56:33 AM »
Not a tip, but thing to remember.

Most of the time, especially in such happy family settings, people there want you to succeed, they don't hope for your failure. They are not there to look and find mistakes or errors in what you do.

This was big thing for me to hear, it think it was one of our lecturers or something, who talked about this regarding presentations and such we have to do in our studies. That the reality is, most people will be nice, not hostile. Sure, jerks exist. But, in a family setting where most likely guests are happy to attend the wedding and are supportive, it's even more unlikely.

Another Sarah

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Re: Why did I say yes? Now I'm a nervous wreck!
« Reply #21 on: April 23, 2015, 09:57:59 AM »
I get stage fright all the time, and it's horrible. I totally sympathise OP!
Other posters are right - don't focus on the people - focus on the couple or find an object to stare at over their heads.
Try to focus your mind on the positive of stage fright - the urge to get it right. Make sure you know exactly what you need to say and if you get a nervous twinge, think to yourself, that's me reminding me what to say. I know what to say. so I'm OK.
 
Two tricks I use to calm my nerves before going onstage:
1) Take a deep breath, in through the nose, for a slow count of five. hold for a slow count of five. breathe out through your mouth for a slow count of five. Try and measure your breath so there's none left at all when you've finished. Do it five times.
2) Tense every single muscle in your body, all at once, fists, shoulders, jaw, eyelids, everything. Hold for a minute then, starting from the top of your head, relax each muscle in turn, going from your face to your neck, down your arms, torso and finally your legs. Finish by wriggling your toes!

SamiHami

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Well, the wedding was yesterday. It was great! I felt good in my new dress and jewelry. The weather cooperated (lucky, since there was a tropical storm advisory) and the setting, a horse farm, was stunning. We got there a little late, because the directions were not good (they were included in the wedding invites). It was in a town about 1.5 hours from where we live, so we were totally lost. It was so far out in the country that we couldn't pick up a cell phone signal to call or try to map our way there. But, since we had bad directions, so did everyone else. We found our way there and everything was fine. It actually started about 20 minutes late because we had to wait for the other lost guests to arrive.

Aside from that little mix up it was wonderful. We were under the canopy of a great old oak tree. The bride was truly beautiful. I got through it all without any nerves; no turning red, no shaking, nothing. It was just fun and I love that I was part of such a happy event on Mother's day, since my Mom passed away a week ago Friday. It got me out of my own head and thinking about other people.

I don't have any juicy crazy/tacky wedding stories to share! Oh well!  ;D The worst think was that after it was all over, I realized I had my sunglasses pushed up on top of my head throughout the ceremony.   8)  I asked DH why he didn't point it out so I could take them off. His answer? "Why would you bother? You always have them on your head like that."  Argh!  But if that's the worst thing to happen, then that's not so bad.

What have you got? Is it food? Is it for me? I want it whatever it is!

JeanFromBNA

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Re: Why did I say yes? Now I'm a nervous wreck!
« Reply #23 on: May 11, 2015, 02:14:57 PM »
Glad it went well.  Did you have them on your head for the photos?

SamiHami

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Re: Why did I say yes? Now I'm a nervous wreck!
« Reply #24 on: May 11, 2015, 02:19:58 PM »
Yes  :-[

What have you got? Is it food? Is it for me? I want it whatever it is!

mandycorn

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I wouldn't worry about it. My sister's officiant had auto-tinting lenses in her glasses, so you can't really see her eyes in any pictures. I think it's better to be able to see your eyes, even with the sunglasses headband. Plus, it sounds like a really happy event, so I'm sure they'll remember the ceremony fondly and not worry about the sunglasses.

And congratulations on a successful wedding!
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