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Author Topic: MIL and my clothes  (Read 8849 times)

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Ms_Cellany

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MIL and my clothes
« on: March 03, 2015, 04:06:20 PM »
Just went on a cruise with The Sweetie and her mother. The cruise was fabulous, the MIL a bit wearing at times.

<bg>MIL runs cold, so she tends to bundle up, and if she feels cold, she'll go on (and on, and on...) about how she's "Freezing! Freezing to death!" at temperatures that I find comfortably brisk.</bg>

Early in the cruise, I was wearing a tunic, leggings, and sandals. MIL was wearing multiple layers and kvetching about the cold. Then she asked if I was cold. (No, I'm fine.) How could I not be cold!?! It's freezing! To death!

I finally said, "I'm comfortable. Thank you for asking," with a "this discussion's over" tone.

(The Sweetie said MIL later complained to her about how I "blew her off."  The Sweetie told her, "Well, you were grilling a grown woman about her clothing. That's not cool.")

Best part? She didn't mention my clothes for the rest of the two weeks!





« Last Edit: March 03, 2015, 04:12:04 PM by Ms_Cellany »
Bingle bongle dingle dangle yickity-do yickity-dah ping-pong lippy-toppy too tah.

EllenS

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Re: MIL and my clothes
« Reply #1 on: March 03, 2015, 04:11:21 PM »
Well done.
I always wonder about interactions like that. Does she want you to commiserate and join the kvetch party? Or does she want you to cluck over her and mother her?

greencat

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Re: MIL and my clothes
« Reply #2 on: March 03, 2015, 04:14:59 PM »
Good for your sweetie for handling it.

You might be able to say, if she goes that route again, "I'm sorry to hear your circulation isn't so good anymore.  I'm perfectly comfortable right now."

Mustard

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Re: MIL and my clothes
« Reply #3 on: March 03, 2015, 04:25:40 PM »
I remember my late MIL looking me up and down, before saying:'the young can wear anything'..

ladyknight1

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Re: MIL and my clothes
« Reply #4 on: March 03, 2015, 04:42:01 PM »
I get similar conversations from colleagues who are both older and younger. I run warm. I always have. I dress for my office temperatures and add layers as needed.

Well done, Ms_Cellany!
“All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost."
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Ms_Cellany

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Re: MIL and my clothes
« Reply #5 on: March 03, 2015, 05:43:49 PM »
Side effect of the conversation: On one of the land excursions, I took a calculated risk and didn't take a jacket with me. I told The Sweetie that if I got cold, I wouldn't dare mention it.


Luckily, the day stayed nice.
Bingle bongle dingle dangle yickity-do yickity-dah ping-pong lippy-toppy too tah.

BeagleMommy

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Re: MIL and my clothes
« Reply #6 on: March 04, 2015, 02:07:24 PM »
Good for you and your Sweetie!  I run into this a lot with my mother (though not to the extreme you did).  Mom and I both run cold.  DH and DS run warm.  We keep our house at a reasonable temperature but if I get cold I throw on a sweater.

Mom regularly lectures me about DS not wearing a jacket (and gloves, scarf and hat) even though our weather has been sometimes brutally cold.  He does wear a jacket when it is below freezing but if he's going to work he feels his chef's coat is enough.  ::)  The boy runs seriously warm!

I started saying "Mom, how do I make a twenty-three-year-old wear a coat?

artk2002

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Re: MIL and my clothes
« Reply #7 on: March 04, 2015, 03:04:16 PM »
You've never heard the expression "Put on a sweater; your mother is cold"?
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bow lines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.

scotcat60

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Re: MIL and my clothes
« Reply #8 on: March 08, 2015, 08:27:01 AM »
Recently, during a very cold spell in London UK I saw a man who was wearing Bermuda shorts and flip-flops, and a girl who looked as if she had forgotten either her skirt or trousers. Her tights were tight in every sense of the word, and you could see the thong she was wearing beneath them. Everyone else, including me, was bundled up like a fugitve from Ernest Shackletons Polar expeditions.

Some people's thermoregulatory systems are different from others.

Dazi

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Re: MIL and my clothes
« Reply #9 on: March 08, 2015, 11:06:57 AM »
I've never understood this attitude.  Everyone's comfort zone is different.  There are many factors that shape it...your own internal thermostat, overall health, certain medical conditions, medication, how much body fat you have, age, where you grew up, etc.

It used to surprise me that our Canadian, Great Britain, and Northern US visitors would go swimming at the beach on chilly days from December through February (from maybe the 50s- low 70s).   Then I had a relative marry into our family that grew up in the tropics.  Even in 80° weather she wears long pants, long sleeve shirts, and has a jacket because she is cold...I've only seen her wear lighter clothing when it hits 100° here.

When I was younger,  I ran very hot.  Even when it snowed, my mom had to fight me to take my winter coat with me.  Now that I've lost so much weight, I run cold. I dress in layers and at least have a sweater with me at all times.
Meditate. Live purely. Quiet the mind. Do your work with mastery. Like the moon, come out from behind the clouds! Shine. ---Gautama Buddah





ladyknight1

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Re: MIL and my clothes
« Reply #10 on: March 08, 2015, 03:19:09 PM »
I have a handful of colleagues who will ask me if I'm cold, because they are cold!
“All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost."
-J.R.R Tolkien

Minmom3

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Re: MIL and my clothes
« Reply #11 on: March 08, 2015, 10:31:25 PM »
And then there's me, still in peri-menopause, still not properly thermo regulating, so I may ask others if they/re warm/cold, because I don't know if it's REALLY that hot/cold or if it's me having a hot/cold flash.  Drives me nuts...  At night, when I go to bed, I'm usually chilled (until summer really arrives) and I bundle up and have ALL the covers on me.  In the middle of the night, if I'm lucky, I'll warm up just enough, and wake up just enough, to kick off enough covers to cool back down before I'm fully awake, and I'll go back to sleep and be good the rest of the night.  If I'm not lucky (all too frequently), I will wake up sweating like a pig, and I'm wide awake, hot as hell, and I don't get back to sleep for sometimes 2 hours....  Such a giant nuisance when that happens.
Double MIL now; not yet a Grandma.  Owner of Lard Butt Noelle, kitteh extraordinaire!