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  • November 25, 2017, 03:54:40 AM

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Author Topic: I really hope it wasn't me who was out of line when I used this one.  (Read 10638 times)

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stargazergirl74

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This past weekend, I was at my son's little league game. I arrived early because he had warm ups, so I headed over to the bleachers to get a spot to sit. The way this particular field is set up is that there is only one set of bleachers, which is directly behind home plate. Supporters of both teams share, but pretty much keep to our own "side". The back stop wall is pretty high, which means if you sit on the first three benches, you wont be able to see anything. Also important: There is NO SHADE, so most folks bring an umbrella. This is not really an issue, as the bleachers are quite large and there is plenty of room for everyone to spread out. I picked a spot on the 4th bench up, and on the end because my dad was joining us. My dad had a stroke a few years ago, and although (thankfully) he is doing very well, his balance isn't quite what it used to be. For this reason, I didn't sit up any higher. Some time later (maybe 15 minutes), a couple arrives. At this point, it was me (with my two stadium chairs and an umbrella) and maybe about 5 other people scattered about. The woman stopped, looked at me and said,"Well, this is going to be a problem. You will either have to move or take down your umbrella". I looked around at the lack of people and asked why I would need to do that? She said that she was going to sit directly behind me on the 5th bench and my umbrella would be in her way. She then suggested that I move up higher. I told her that wouldn't be possible because someone was joining me and couldn't make it up there. She then suggested that I move down lower. I again told her that wouldn't be possible because we would not be able to see anything because of the height of the backstop wall. Then she suggested that I move to the other side. Needless to say, I declined to move or to put my umbrella down (it was quite warm here in sunny CA). They ended up sitting on the bench behind me and to the side. I was careful to keep my umbrella over myself and my dad so that it wouldn't get in front of them. For the record, these were not people who had any difficulty getting up and down the bleachers, so that wasn't the issue. There were a few huffs and whispered comments from them and I'm sure I will hear about it again at the next game since they are usually there. But really, I don't think I was out of line at all. If you want a particular seat, get there early. In the mean time, if anyone has any suggestions for responses if they say something in the future, I would love to hear.

Thanks!

Cherry91

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Re: I really hope it wasn't me who was out of line when I used this one.
« Reply #1 on: March 30, 2015, 01:23:05 PM »
IMO, you were fine. This is a "first come first seated" situation, and if there was plenty of space still left to sit in, the other woman had no right to demand you move seats.

I suspect the couple have certain seats they like to sit in at every game, to the point that they designate it their "spot" and manage to forget they don't actually have any real claim to it over other people watching...
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Tierrainney

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Re: I really hope it wasn't me who was out of line when I used this one.
« Reply #2 on: March 30, 2015, 01:40:40 PM »
So it sounds like the bleachers were about 80% (or more) empty when they arrived, but they wanted to sit directly behind you and complain?

Nope, I don't think you were the rude one here.
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lowspark

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Re: I really hope it wasn't me who was out of line when I used this one.
« Reply #3 on: March 30, 2015, 01:40:54 PM »
I think you handled it well. If she were already sitting there and then you sat in front of her, I could see her asking you to either move or take down your umbrella, but since you were there first, she is the one who will need to work around you, not vice versa.

Plus she was rather rude in her delivery if those were her words. She essentially ordered you to move as opposed to politely asking.
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stargazergirl74

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Re: I really hope it wasn't me who was out of line when I used this one.
« Reply #4 on: March 30, 2015, 01:57:38 PM »
So it sounds like the bleachers were about 80% (or more) empty when they arrived, but they wanted to sit directly behind you and complain?

Nope, I don't think you were the rude one here.
You are correct. The bleachers were nearly empty.

I think you handled it well. If she were already sitting there and then you sat in front of her, I could see her asking you to either move or take down your umbrella, but since you were there first, she is the one who will need to work around you, not vice versa.

Plus she was rather rude in her delivery if those were her words. She essentially ordered you to move as opposed to politely asking.

Exactly! I would NEVER go sit in front of someone and then put up an umbrella. Also, yes, those were her exact words. She did not ask. She demanded.

pattycake

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Re: I really hope it wasn't me who was out of line when I used this one.
« Reply #5 on: March 30, 2015, 02:01:56 PM »
I think you're good. You picked your place based on certain reasons or criteria, and were prepared to answer her with them. You got there early to choose your seating, they had lots of other alternatives. I say no worries!

TootsNYC

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Re: I really hope it wasn't me who was out of line when I used this one.
« Reply #6 on: March 30, 2015, 02:03:11 PM »
I think you're good. You picked your place based on certain reasons or criteria, and were prepared to answer her with them. You got there early to choose your seating, they had lots of other alternatives. I say no worries!

Seriously, you didn't need to defend your reasons for sitting there.

You should have simply look at her and said, "I was here first. There are plenty of other seats, even some just a few inches away."


NFPwife

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Re: I really hope it wasn't me who was out of line when I used this one.
« Reply #7 on: March 30, 2015, 02:37:18 PM »
I think you're good. You picked your place based on certain reasons or criteria, and were prepared to answer her with them. You got there early to choose your seating, they had lots of other alternatives. I say no worries!

Seriously, you didn't need to defend your reasons for sitting there.

You should have simply look at her and said, "I was here first. There are plenty of other seats, even some just a few inches away."

POD. It was nice of you to offer the explanation. (Sometimes I get torn between when offering an explanation is JADEing and when it's helping expand the person's perspective, that's probably a whole 'nother thread.) Good for you for not moving. If they say/ do anything PA in the future, I'd just ignore it.

Lynnv

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Re: I really hope it wasn't me who was out of line when I used this one.
« Reply #8 on: March 30, 2015, 03:13:05 PM »
If the bleachers filled up (which, based on you description they didn't), then I think it would be rude to block other peoples' lines of sight with umbrellas (or silly hats or potted palm trees).   However, in this case where there is both plenty of room to choose an unobstructed seat and a history and culture that accepts that umbrellas are a norm, I don't see where you were at all out of line.

I suppose an argument could be made that blocking a large group of the best seats in the stadium could be rude-but it sounds like you were down at the end, rather than right in the perfect spot.  And even then, with a place where umbrella use is accepted and seats are plentiful, that is a pretty tough argument to make.   
Lynn

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TracyXJ

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Re: I really hope it wasn't me who was out of line when I used this one.
« Reply #9 on: March 30, 2015, 03:17:32 PM »
I hope I'm not the only one that loved how this woman had all sorts of suggestions for where the OP could move, but couldn't seem to do that herself?

Really, once she suggested that you switch sides, I'd be very tempted to ask her why she couldn't do that?  But that would be really snarky and I'm not the confrontational type.

TootsNYC

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Re: I really hope it wasn't me who was out of line when I used this one.
« Reply #10 on: March 30, 2015, 04:40:55 PM »
I hope I'm not the only one that loved how this woman had all sorts of suggestions for where the OP could move, but couldn't seem to do that herself?

You are not! I also was amused by how many "other seat" options she could come up with for someone else.

stargazergirl74

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Re: I really hope it wasn't me who was out of line when I used this one.
« Reply #11 on: March 30, 2015, 05:59:06 PM »
I hope I'm not the only one that loved how this woman had all sorts of suggestions for where the OP could move, but couldn't seem to do that herself?

You are not! I also was amused by how many "other seat" options she could come up with for someone else.

LOL! I was so tempted to respond to each suggestions with, "No thank you, but you can sit there if you like."

Drunken Housewife

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Re: I really hope it wasn't me who was out of line when I used this one.
« Reply #12 on: March 30, 2015, 06:57:39 PM »
She was so rude that it is breathtaking to me. 

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Danika

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Re: I really hope it wasn't me who was out of line when I used this one.
« Reply #13 on: March 30, 2015, 08:32:39 PM »
She was so rude that it is breathtaking to me.

POD!

I'm sorry you had to endure listening to her rude comments under her breath when she couldn't strongarm you.

PastryGoddess

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Re: I really hope it wasn't me who was out of line when I used this one.
« Reply #14 on: March 31, 2015, 12:39:21 AM »
This is an instance when cultivating a good smirk would go a long way.