News: IT'S THE 2ND ANNUAL GUATEMALA LIBRARY PROJECT BOOK DRIVE!    LOOKING FOR DONATIONS OF SCIENCE BOOKS THIS YEAR.    Check it out in the "Extending the Hand of Kindness" folder or here: http://www.etiquettehell.com/smf/index.php?topic=139832.msg3372084#msg3372084   

  • November 23, 2017, 09:17:09 AM

Login with username, password and session length

Author Topic: Does this sound acceptable to wear as a guest?  (Read 8244 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Harriet Jones

  • Member
  • Posts: 8650
  • Yes, we know who you are.
Re: Does this sound acceptable to wear as a guest?
« Reply #15 on: July 10, 2015, 05:35:14 PM »
'Real' meaning you'd be turned away or just that the bride will throw a fit?

catwhiskers

  • Member
  • Posts: 357
Re: Does this sound acceptable to wear as a guest?
« Reply #16 on: July 15, 2015, 08:13:54 AM »
All the guests have been informed about the clothing requirements. I didn't ask how this was done, but there was nothing about it in our invite and I am not aware of a wedding website. I'm not going to ask because I don't want to stir up anything.

'Real' meaning you'd be turned away or just that the bride will throw a fit?

I can't imagine anyone turning away guests because of the colour/pattern of their clothing, so I hope not. Not sure about the second one either, OH says it's possible, but more likely that she would just seethe in silence on the day and then talk afterwards about how inconsiderate and selfish I am. I haven't met many of his extended family and that is not the impression I want to leave them with.

(Edited to finish the post as I manage to post it before I had finished writing it).

Oh Joy

  • Member
  • Posts: 1982
Re: Does this sound acceptable to wear as a guest?
« Reply #17 on: July 15, 2015, 08:49:49 AM »
catwhiskers, I've been meaning to post and praise you for your prudence in this situation.   The bride's (or maybe it's both members of the happy couple) request sounds ridiculous and you had to go out of your way to comply, but you're putting your respect for your OH and his family dynamics first.  There are times to stand up, and this isn't one of those.

Now, will your OH take you out for a special evening so you can wear your original ensemble?   :D


artk2002

  • Member
  • Posts: 13812
    • The Delian's Commonwealth
Re: Does this sound acceptable to wear as a guest?
« Reply #19 on: July 20, 2015, 10:12:34 AM »
I'd love to provide full information on the exact restrictions, but I don't want to get into identifying information. However, I can say that four colours and one type of pattern are on the list. Apparently three of the excluded colours are being used in the wedding party, and the other colour and the pattern, the bride just does not like.

This bride is entirely out of line. She needs to grow up -- her attitude towards her guests and their dress is extremely immature. So immature that I have doubts that she's grown up enough to be married. If she wants an audience dressed a certain way, she can hire some out-of-work actors and a good costume designer. You don't treat your loved ones and friends like extras in a movie.
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bow lines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.

Winterlight

  • On the internet, no one can tell you're a dog- arf.
  • Member
  • Posts: 10101
Re: Does this sound acceptable to wear as a guest?
« Reply #20 on: July 21, 2015, 03:45:22 PM »
The bride is being ridiculous, but I understand that this might not be a hill you want to die on, especially if this is the first time you're meeting some of your OH's family. I think you're being sensible.
If wisdom’s ways you wisely seek,
Five things observe with care,
To whom you speak,
Of whom you speak,
And how, and when, and where.
Caroline Lake Ingalls

catwhiskers

  • Member
  • Posts: 357
Re: Does this sound acceptable to wear as a guest?
« Reply #21 on: July 28, 2015, 01:40:26 PM »
The wedding was at the weekend. I wore the red/white/gold dress (in accordance with the colour requirements) as planned, and the bride's mother admired it. :) The anticipated other drama never happened. Everything went well and it was a lovely wedding.