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Author Topic: Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .  (Read 10587 times)

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jpcher

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Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .
« on: September 26, 2015, 03:57:23 PM »
DD#2 is standing up for a wedding in October of next year. Bride picked out the dresses and asked for the BMs to order and pay for them now. Wedding shop won't put in the order until all the dresses are paid for in full.

The dresses are non-refundable/returnable . . . from Davids Bridal store (a large chain, right?)

Plus, Bride chose shoes and asked for them to be bought now too . . . specific style and will be dyed.

I'm thinking that a year in advance is overkill to pay (non-refundable) in full for something like this. What if DD#2 gains/looses weight? What if the couple breaks up? What if DD#2 grows a corn on her foot and the shoe size will no longer be comfortable?



Is ordering dresses/shoes a year in advance normal?

Harriet Jones

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Re: Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .
« Reply #1 on: September 26, 2015, 04:00:58 PM »
That seems a little early.  How long does the shop say it will take to get them in?

Dazi

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Re: Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .
« Reply #2 on: September 26, 2015, 04:13:38 PM »
Unless the style is bring discontinued, that is crazy. IME, you may put down a deposit on a dress that early, but typically they are not ordered until 6-12 weeks out. Even 12 weeks out is a bit iffy, but that can allow for returns or alterations if needed.
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JoieGirl7

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Re: Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .
« Reply #3 on: September 26, 2015, 10:46:05 PM »
Seems like a horrible idea. And why would a chain like David's need to order them all at once and have them paid in advance all at once?

Are the bridesmaids paying the store directly?

Whole thing seems a bit off.

lmyrs

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Re: Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .
« Reply #4 on: September 27, 2015, 12:42:48 AM »
They'd have to be ordered all at once because they need to make them all with the same bolt of fabric so they all match. Different bolts will have subtle differences that can be noticeable when they're all side by side.

But a full year out is pretty long. I don't think 6 months is too long though. Regardless of the time, it's generally advised to order a size bigger or so and then have it altered shortly before the wedding. Ordering big allowsbyou to put on some weight and you can always take a dress in. It's harder to let one out.

rose red

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Re: Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .
« Reply #5 on: September 27, 2015, 08:28:31 AM »
Seems like a horrible idea. And why would a chain like David's need to order them all at once and have them paid in advance all at once?

Probably got this request before and something happened during the year and David didn't get paid the full amount. I'm sure any bridal store has seen and experienced it all :P Even non-professionals here think it's a bad idea to order so early.

peaches

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Re: Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .
« Reply #6 on: September 27, 2015, 11:25:43 AM »
Wedding shop won't put in the order until all the dresses are paid for in full.

The dresses are non-refundable/returnable . . . from Davids Bridal store (a large chain, right?)

This is all believable and in fact sounds reasonable to me.

That doesn't mean the dresses have to be ordered a year before the wedding. That part is unusual, and unnecessary IMO. It's the bride's idea.

I think the bridesmaids should have a say in this. I would give some pushback, if I were a bridesmaid. I would be asking "Why can't we do this six months in advance?"

I looked at the David's Bridal website, and they can deliver bridesmaid's dresses in 6 to 8 weeks. (There would still need to be time for alterations.) I can imagine a salesperson encouraging brides to order as early as possible. But in my experience, 6 months out from the wedding is about right. (That's for placing the order; discussions about style, color, etc. could be going on before that.)






« Last Edit: September 27, 2015, 11:43:53 AM by peaches »

Zizi-K

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Re: Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .
« Reply #7 on: September 27, 2015, 01:07:28 PM »
I think that ordering BM's dresses a year in advance is pretty common for some retailers -- but not for David's bridal. The whole point of buying from there is that you can get things pretty quickly. Also, if you lose or gain weight, my understanding is that they tell you not to have them resized, but rather to exchange the dress for another size in the store. (that's what they told my sister) David's Bridal are known for being very reasonably priced, and part of that is that they are not really made to be taken apart.

I would suggest that your DD call David's directly to find out what their policy is in case of weight gain/loss. Then she'll know whether to order now (knowing she has a safety net), whether she can hold off (I have my doubts about the color matching question being a big issue), or whether she will have to watch what she eats for the next year.

shortstuff

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Re: Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .
« Reply #8 on: September 27, 2015, 02:41:45 PM »
I just dealt with David's for my wedding, and most of what OP wrote is not my experience.  YMMV, especially since this is a chain that can have different store/regional managers.  For me and my bridesmaids:

It took 2-4 months for my girls' dresses to come in, so ordering in advance is a good idea.  1 year is really in advance, but maybe the bride has a reason, like just checking it off her list.  It's worth DD asking about.  Who knows, maybe there's an "end of season sale" or a soon-to-be discontinued dress that bride wants to get. 

Bridesmaids dresses are "special occasion," and not exchangeable or returnable. 

Ordering together to get the same bolt of fabric, so the colors match - I've done it for designer dresses, but I never thought it was a big deal for David's.  It was not something the salespeople mentioned to me or my girls.

I used David's because the girls are all spread out over 2 states, and they each went to the store at their convenience and ordered their dress.  I had registered my wedding date and dress color with the store, so they linked the info and the store updated me when the dresses were available.  I've never heard of a store telling everyone to buy their dress all together.  I never even had that at the boutique where I got a designer BM dress.  How would the store even know, anyway, considering they could try on in store and then order online? 

It might be worth thinking about, too, is that David's has "their own" brand of dresses, but they also carry other designers, so that could change a lot of the info we're discussing here. 

Cali.in.UK

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Re: Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .
« Reply #9 on: September 27, 2015, 03:52:11 PM »
I actually got my MOH dress at David's bridal and when I was looking at options (we had a color and length but could choose our own dresses within the guidelines) and there was one style that I thought was super pretty but they did not have the color I wanted at the store. This was about 10-12 weeks before the wedding. The sales rep checked on the computer and said, "oh sorry, that dress has to be ordered 18 weeks before the deadline." I was shocked! 18 weeks seemed crazy to me. And it was one of their 5 top selling bridesmaids design dresses so it wasn't as if I was ordering some random, discontinued item. So maybe David's Bridal has weird rules about ordering in advance/extra long wait times?

Syfygeek

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Re: Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .
« Reply #10 on: September 27, 2015, 06:51:37 PM »
If the entire wedding party pays and orders the dresses, plus shoes, I'm pretty sure the bride gets a discount. And if not on her dress, on the grooms outfit and guys fixed from the formal wear shop that is probably next door to David's.

David's will tell you it takes months to get a dress in, but you can order on line and get it in as little as 4 weeks, as long as you don't go thru the store.

Also, OP, when your dd tries on a dress, and if it fits, they will say it's stretched out from being tried on so much and strongly encourage you to order at least one size larger. And when it arrives and is too big, the alterations will be  really expensive, starting at 75 bucks for a hem.

And yes, I did work there, how can you tell?
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Ceallach

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Re: Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .
« Reply #11 on: September 27, 2015, 09:49:27 PM »
If I was in the bridal party I would be mildly irritated at having to purchase the dress so far in advance.   But I would accept the bride's decision if she had her heart set on those dresses.

From a business perspective I don't think the shop is unreasonable to want payment.   If you don't want to pay now don't buy now... unfortunately in this case the bride wants you to buy now!
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Hmmmmm

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Re: Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .
« Reply #12 on: September 28, 2015, 09:15:07 AM »
A year in advance is way to far out for BM dresses. But maybe these are "true custom order" dresses. I once had that happen in a wedding I was in. The manufacturer required all the dresses be paid for up front. And they would not order the fabric for the dresses until payment had been received for all. But even then, the dresses were picked out probably 9 months ahead and then all payments were made about 6 months before wedding and we received the dresses 2 months prior to finalize fitting. The last BM dress I ordered was for DD and her's required 6 months in advance and we paid half down at ordering and the other half pre-fitting.

If I were your DD, I'd ask why they were placing the orders so far in advance. It might be one of those silly "how to plan a stress free wedding" advices to make sure you don't end up with a BM who let's you know 4 months pre-wedding that she doesnt' have the money for her dress.

wordgirl

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Re: Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .
« Reply #13 on: September 28, 2015, 10:22:26 AM »
Also, OP, when your dd tries on a dress, and if it fits, they will say it's stretched out from being tried on so much and strongly encourage you to order at least one size larger. And when it arrives and is too big, the alterations will be  really expensive, starting at 75 bucks for a hem.

And yes, I did work there, how can you tell?
LOL. They said this exact thing to me. IIRC, word-for-word!

Fortunately, bride found a set of bridesmaid dresses she liked in a consignment shop and miraculously, there was a dress to fit each maid. Mind didn't even have to be altered.

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Is this normal? Bridesmaid dresses . . .
« Reply #14 on: September 28, 2015, 11:03:58 AM »
Considering that a friend of mine got engaged at the end of May and got married on the weekend after Labour Day, complete with a MOH and two bridesmaids?  A year out seems like a really long time to order dresses.  We were getting ours through Sears, though, rather than a traditional bridal store.
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