Get out of my bubble!

[goblue2539]

I'm one of those people who has a personal space bubble.  It is mine, and if I don't invite you into it, stay out.  Today, getting lunch at Boston Market, I had the misfortune to have a very rude lady behind me in line.  I was at the register trying to pay for my lunch and she started crowding me.  I looked at her, looked at the gap between us, and then turned back to the lady at the register.  Rude lady took this as her cue to move closer to me.  I didn't move over, but I know there had to have been something I could have said politely to get her out of my bubble.  Ideas for next time?

[Alida]

Elbows are very very useful in these situations.

"Oh, oops - I hadn't realized you were right on top of me!"

[goblue2539]

If only I'd had my purse on that side.....  

I knew I should've said something instead of just glaring at her, but I honestly couldn't think of anything that wouldn't land me in e-hell directly next to her. 

[ccnumber4]

Nope, no ideas, sorry.  I do know someone who uses this tactic as a control method.  

This kind of thing particularly bugs me at the pharmacy, by the way.  I was tempted to ask a lady once if she was really that fascinated by my choice of birth control.  Seriously, she literally stood right next to me.  When the pharmacist didn't intervene, I did ask her if she could move back behind the line until I was finished.  

[stacykk]

I'm interested in how people respond to this post because I have the same issues!

I've been know to step back away from people that enter my personal space or to leave places that are crowded because someone *might* enter my personal space and I will have no where to retreat to!

My friends keep asking me how I ever got a boyfriend with this problem!  

[goblue2539]

My friends keep asking me how I ever got a boyfriend with this problem!  

Easy.   You found a guy who let you learn to trust him before he invaded your bubble.  I'm still looking, so if you happen to meet another one.....   

[Clara Bow]

I am near to freeky about my personal space, I'm even a little funky with hubby about it on certain days. There is nothing that I would throw you in e-hell for wrong with saying "Excuse me, but you're really standing close to me and it's making me uncomfortable. Please move back." It's not rude to make requests of people, it's only rude to make demands (sometimes).
If you're really uncomfortable saying something, turn to the side and start coughing or sling your hair back over your shoulders, or your purse. That should get your point across.

[goblue2539]

If it had been someplace where I wouldn't have been moving away anyway in about a minute, I probably would have, but it would've been one of those tone of voice things.  Probably, "DO you mind?" 

But, I really love your idea Auntie, since I've had bronchitis this week.

[ccnumber4]

I second Alida's elbow solution!

[hobish]

I'm interested in how people respond to this post because I have the same issues!

I've been know to step back away from people that enter my personal space or to leave places that are crowded because someone *might* enter my personal space and I will have no where to retreat to!

I am the same way. The only place i can deal with it is at punk shows where for some reason i can just gear my head up for knowing that people will be touching me. Like Auntie Venom, it is even with Mr. HGish - he stands right in my space in stores & i will walk 2 feet.stop. take a step. stop. take a step. stop...until he realized he is doing it. I don't understand it. I wish i had some advice about the lady behind you ... if it were me i probably would have up & left, but i am a weakling in some situations.

[ShadesOfGrey]

"Excuse me, but you're really standing close to me and it's making me uncomfortable. Please move back." It's not rude to make requests of people, it's only rude to make demands (sometimes).

i am a big fan of direct, honest and polite.  this is perfect. Or "would you mind giving me a little more room?" although I dont think phrasing it as a question is as effective. 

[Cyndi]

LOL Oh my, I have this too! Funny though is that I don't mind it in choir where we're often packed together like sardines, though I tend to jiggle my chair a little loose to make a few more inches of space. I'm a clutz when I move around, so even when I make space I still bump my neighbors with my elbows. I'm always whispering "sorry! Oops!", but Joanie and Claudia are used to it and have even mentioned on days when I'm absent that they missed getting elbow-poked

But in public if I get crowded, I tend to back into the person and step on their foot or something "by accident" before saying "'scuse me".


Oh and the hairslinging trick - not a good idea for me to try. I could kill somebody with a braid! LOL

[goblue2539]

First, I'm really glad to know I'm not the only person on the planet with this problem.  Second, I can implement all of these next time so long as I manage to get my temper under control.  Usually by the time I trust myself enough to say something I've already moved from wherever I was.  You're all so great!

[HogwartsAlum]

I don't like it either, especially when I'm paying for something with my debit card.  I don't want anyone to look over my shoulder and see my PIN.  I just put my head way down over the thing so they can't look.  It might look stupid, but it works.

Or I just do it as credit.

[Pixie]

I HATE that!   I usually cough a bit and say, "Not too close, I have a cold."   That almost always works. The bad thing is, I really hate it when its children who get too close, I do NOT want to be touched and other people's children make me uncomfortable.   I guess I'm more afraid the parent will get angry if I accidentally trip over their kid.

I like my bubble, but sometimes I let Hubby in,  After all, just 20 short years ago, Hubby was a stranger!
I always let my kids in for hugs and cuddles!